Monday 12 Oct 2009 at 10:18 pm (GMT+01)
Isabelle suggested something: to have an article that would be a gallery of photos each person feels like posting. They don’t need to be pictures you took yourself, they can be anything you found interesting.
And also, to rate pictures posted. Maybe to say what you like about it or don’t like? I think it would be a good idea to also say a little about the picture when we post it.
Ok, I’ll start, I don’t have any pictures of my own except the Chambord chateau, but you’ve already seen them. Here are 3 I found on PP’s picture archives, I think I remember it’s Mr P who posted them:
401 Responses to “Photos?” »»
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testing –my comments aren’t posting at my website.
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Stiletto (Mr P?),
Wow, these are amazing shots. 8/10 from me.
Here is a funny one I found on the Internet:
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Stiletto,
Brilliant photos. 9/10
Isabelle,
Lol, poor pussy, very cute. 7/10
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Stiletto/Mr P,
Congrats on finding those bear/dog pictures. I’ll give them 9/10.
Isabelle,
Yours is pretty cool too. Let’s say 8/10.
Here’s one which will send Barb in an orgasmic frenzy of debauchery:
[WhyNot/Stiletto, please insert the pic I sent you.]
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Shitstirrer,
That’s the spirit. I give it a 10 and it is not even posted yet.
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Mr P,
“That’s the spirit. I give it a 10 and it is not even posted yet.”
Lolol, wait I’ll put the picture in now. I think you’ll like it.
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ShitStirrer,
“Here’s one which will send Barb in an orgasmic frenzy of debauchery”
LOLLLLL, is it Barb and her husband at a fancy dress party?
I must find some photos and post some!
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I found this one which I think is interesting: it’s in Paris, there is the Eiffel tower in the back, and in the front the small version of the statue of liberty on a tiny island on the Seine river.
(please post my photo here)
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Stiletto,
I love the bear/dog photos, I always tell my friends that my dog Yogi has an imaginary friend called Bobo the Brown Biscuit Eater (the bear who escaped from the circus).
Rory
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Rory,
“… my dog Yogi has an imaginary friend called Bobo the Brown Biscuit Eater (the bear who escaped from the circus).”
This sounds very nice. Can you do a photoshop montage of it?
Valérie
Your picture (in comment 8 ) is so strange. Is this real? There is a little liberty statue in Paris? It looks like New York and Paris have melted togther.
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Valérie,
“is it Barb and her husband at a fancy dress party?”
Could be, but the broad’s too small. I’d say it’s more likely to be her son and her daughter.
Great and unusual pic of Paris. Thanks, 9/10.
Stiletto,
“There is a little liberty statue in Paris? ”
Wouldn’t surprise me. Those French assholes steal all our ideas. Only, they can’t do it as well as us.
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Well I get on a plane to Japan in 3 1/2 hours (well actually to Heathrow but then to Japan) so when I get back I should have at least a handful of photos in-focus enough to post.
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Valerie, I have seen that view and I believe there are two more. I have a friend who is a history buff who lives on the Boulevarde Montparnasse who has collected references to Americans in Paris.
He’s totally French, but it is his little passion. He recently sent me this list:
Washington on a horse at the Place d’Iena
Bust of Jefferson at the place d’Etats Unis
Statue of Liberte on the Rue Guynemer Jardin des Tuileries
Statue of Liberte at the Pont de Grenelle (your picture)
Statue of Liberte at the Jardin des Buttes Chaumont
Statue of Thomas Jefferson at the Musee d’Orsay
Statue of Benjamin Franklin at the Place du Trocadero
Statue of Rosa Park at Espace sportif Place PronteauBatboy, I can’t wait to see your pics of Hong Kong.
I’ll try to take some interesting pictures of New York.
I posted a picture of the building my apartment is in in Manhattan a few years ago and no one believed that it was a real picture. I have to find it and post a picture of how the block looks now..
At the time of my photo, there was a great graffiti that read “Kill Yuppie Scum and Drink Their Blood”
spray painted across the front. There was garbage everywhere. Sometimes I get nostalgic…. -
Microdot,
“Washington on a horse at the Place d’Iena
Bust of Jefferson at the place d’Etats Unis …”No bust of asshole GW Bush?
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Microdot,
I had no idea of how many statues of American presidents and the Liberté there was in Paris, LOL. I knew there are many many streets named after American famous people or just the name of the country.
“Batboy, I can’t wait to see your pics of Hong Kong.”
Euh… I don’t think Hong Kong is in Japan, LOL.
Stiletto,
“No bust of asshole GW Bush?”
LOLLL, I don’t think there will be one ever. It is interesting that the revered American presidents are Jefferson, Washington and Franklin. I don’t think there will be Bush or Raegan or other idiots like them.
Here is one I really like. It’s taken from the top of an old building (I don’t know which one) and it shows a gargoyle looking at the roof line of Paris.
(Whynot, put the picture here please)
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ooops…I wrote too fast…JAPAN!! I guess he’s gone now. Anyone know where batboy went in Japan?
The gargoyle is on Notre Dame.I’m going to ask to have 2 photos inserted here.
One is a picture of all the potimarrons and aubergines I harvested today. The little green things in the copper colander are jalepeno peppers and there are two big beets…Detroit Red variety
The other picture is me with a lot of basel and my dog, JJ.
We had to do a lot of harvesting because it is going to freeze here tonight.
Tomorrow I have to dig up all of the potatoes.
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Valérie,
“it shows a gargoyle looking at the roof line of Paris.”
What an eerie stunning picture! The over-1000-years old creepy little monster looks like he’s thinking “I wonder who’s gonna murder whom tonight in some dark alley. From here I can see it all, and if need be, I got wings and can fly around silently like a bat. So long as I’m back here before sunrise. Come on, sun, go down, I can’t wait for the show to begin BWAHAHAHA!”. 9.5/10.
Microdot,
Goodness, your veggie garden is like Rungis market. Are you deep-freezing most of it to last through the winter? Ever thought of sending some of those pumpkins to Barb?
Freezing tonight? Do you mean… as in below 0°C? Shit, here it was 15°C last night in the garage and I thought *I* was freezing! Luckily T-Rex insists on sleeping between my legs and Ingrid leans against my side. They make wonderful hot-water bottles.
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Yes, it’s already just 3 out there and by dawn it should dip below zero. It will be colder tomorrow and the next night. I was out with the dog and it is super clear. You can really see the milky way here. I have been chopping and sawing wood for a few days and there is a fire in the cheminee tonight.
The beets and carrots go into a big box filled with sand. The potimarron go into the grenier. The aubergine turn into baba ganoug and get frozen. We are also slicing a lot of them and baking the slices, then freezing them for tarts this winter. I have bags of cherry tomatoes and green beans frozen.
The potatoes get dug up and washed and stored in the cave in flat wooden boxes.I’ll send a pumpkin to Barb if she promises to hatch it for me.
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Microdot,
“I’ll send a pumpkin to Barb if she promises to hatch it for me.”
I’m scared to think what might come out of it. Say, you look like you need to eat some of all the stuff you grow.
Valérie,
Your gargoyle pic is quite something. Now I feel challenged and need to find something really foul.
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Some wonderful pictures here, thank you all.
Here are a few photos of the Harbin International Ice and Snow Sculpture Festival. Harbin is in north-east China, close to Siberia. These pictures are from the 2003 festival. Many of these sculpures are gigantic.
Stiletto, I think you’ll particularly like the second one. By the way, thank you and you Mr P for finding these photos of this unusual encounter between a dog and a polar bear. I find them very moving. It makes you wonder about human capacity for tolerance and peace. 2 totally different species, the bear used to treat everything moving as prey, the dog trained to defend, and yet something magical happens, on the spur of the moment. One is black, the other white, one is 50 times the size of the other, free instead of being chained, but they share this communion of entente without having read philsophy, religious texts or having been told “it’s the right thing to do”.
End of rant, lol
(WhyNot/Stiletto… when you can
thank you)
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Kristina,
“Here are a few photos of the Harbin International Ice and Snow Sculpture Festival.”
Wow, these are spectacular. I had seen some before, many years ago. It must be quite something to watch the artists work on their sculptures.
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“Say, you look like you need to eat some of all the stuff you grow.”
Now, now, Mr. Shitstirrer…That sounds like something I would hear from the Blob while she was bragging on her sonny boy who lost 60 pounds, but she couldn’t see the difference. I hear he’s down to a double C size sports bra these days.
It’s not easy keeping my ass honed to perfection so I can have my throngs of adoring fundamentalist christian babes worship it. This anti christ thing is not as simple as the job desciption made it out to be. But, hey, a gig’s a gig and they have a great vacation plan and benefits! -
Microdot,
Benifits? Wow, can you please explain what work benifits are. In my distant memory, I recall work benifits, like getting Christmas off with pay. There’s more I have heard of too. Does it mean a health care plan?
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Kristina,
“Here are a few photos of the Harbin International Ice and Snow Sculpture Festival.”
This is amazing! I wonder how the sculpturs know what they are doing. They can’t step back to see what it looks like. They must have a team of people who look from a distance and tell them what to do.
Thank you for the polar bears, lol.
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Kristina,
Ohhh, these photos are so beautiful! I am loving seeing them on the computer screen but I don’t think I would like to see them in reality, LOL. I mean I would of course but only if there was a little heated cabin I could be in, LOL.
Moonlite,
Thank you for posting my comment on Mohamed’s blog.
“Does it mean a health care plan?”
I don’t know much of what is happening in your country, but it doesn’t seem that health care reforms are happening too well. It is a great pity.
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Valérie,
“I mean I would of course but only if there was a little heated cabin I could be in”
Yo, I can dig that. Hey, have you been following Snake Cunters blog? The dude is going totally apeshit.
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Mr. P, or anyone who knows,
What is the provenance of the photographs of the malamute and the polar bear?
Kristina,
Thanks for the pix of Harbin. I have not been there, in any season, but the sculptures are quintessentially Chinese. You can see the same techniques replicated in other mediums, jade and wood, in shops in Hong Kong and other places.
TLGK
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I accidentally came across some photos of tattooed ppl. Some of this stuff… well I find it really scary. Like the 2 examples below, especially the guy’s face even if it is less spectacular than the other dude’s back.
What on earth can drive ppl to mutilate themselves so? And pay money for it! I realize that in many “primitive” tribes, examples of self-inflicted mutilation abound, but ppl are caught in the culture of those tribes and don’t really have the choice to submit or not.
On the other hand, what *pressure* is there in modern western cultures to disfigure oneself? If one was inflicted this kind of treatment against their will, it would be considered extremely grave assault - in par with torture.
So… what gives? What am I missing?
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WhyNot,
These photos of people with tattoos are just horrible. The second one is very artistic and I could understand if it was painting that can be washed, like if you go to a carnival and dress crazily, but then the next day you are still yourself.
For the first one, I can see he is a handsome young man, but if he turned up at my front door for sex, I’d tell him to go fuck himself. I don’t want freaks. I can cope with a man disabled by nature, but not an asshole who thinks he’s cool looking like dracula.
You ask why they do this. I don’t know, but I think it is because they are fucking stupid and have life too easy. They should spend some time in Chechenya, they will not need to pay to have their stupid fucking faces carved for life, the Russian tanks will do it for free.
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whynot, where did you find the absolut restraint picture? Did I send it a few years ago?
Yes, it is a real photograph of a real person with an all over design based on Japanese tattooing, but it is definitelt painted.
How do I know? I designed it and did the application with a team of people back in 1996 for a photoshoot for an absolute vodka ad.
The design only covered the back of the person. The hook of the design “absolut restraint” was the shape of the bottle…the only part of the person which was not tattooed.
First, I did some drawings of Japanese designs and I came up with a composition we measured the model. I did the final line art to scale. We worked with a technique that enabled us to silk screen the line design on paper quite like cigarette paper with a special ink back wards.
Then the line art was applied in sections, transfered with alcohol.
Then, using the paints we manufactured…we painted the colors.
It took a few hours to do the application, but it was a very popular print ad for Absolut Vodka.
I did a bit of full “body art” in the mid 1990’s. It was an interesting form of expression.I worked a lot with tattoo designs for movies and stage and television, but I never had the impulse of actually get a real tattoo. I do know quite a few real tattoo artists and some of them are truly artists..
The impulse to decorate the body is an impulse that has been around as long as humans…
There are many traditions that developed independently of each other, but the tradition in western society started with the contact of British sailors when Captain Cooke (Mutiny on The Bounty) first voyaged into the South Pacific.The history is pretty sordid as tattooing became a mark of people who identified themselves as being outside of normal society.
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Stiletto,
“They should spend some time in Chechenya, they will not need to pay to have their stupid fucking faces carved for life, the Russian tanks will do it for free.”
LOLLL, I know it is sad, but the way you put it, I can’t stop laughing.
I think you say something right, people in this position have nothing much to worry about in real life even if they pretend to be “anti” everything. I wouldn’t be able to have the money to have tattoos like that put in, and even less the money to be off work for days or weeks because of it.
And I HATE needles! The worst ones are the dentist!
ShitStirrer,
“Hey, have you been following Snake Cunters blog? The dude is going totally apeshit.”
Yes, LOLLL, this guys is so full of himself that it is embarrassing just to read what he writes and to think he doesnt even realize how ridiculous he is.
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Microdot,
“whynot, where did you find the absolut restraint picture? Did I send it a few years ago?”
I found it in PP’s picture gallery. I don’t know where it comes from in the first place. There are so many pics in PP’s gallery that were never posted that I thought I peruse through them before exploring my personal photos and Internet public photos.
“The impulse to decorate the body is an impulse that has been around as long as humans…”
Of course. However, as Stiletto points out, there is a difference between “disguising” oneself for the purpose of fun (or commercial, as is the case for this one, since you say so) and permanently mutilate oneself for life.
Again, “primitive” tribes caught in their pagan beliefs might be trapped in such a syndrome, but what are the motivations for ppl living in modern western societies to do the same if not self-annihilating & self-complaisant ones - or utterly depressed, out of society’s margin sentiments (but having nevertheless the money to carry out such decisions)?
Stiletto,
“For the first one, I can see he is a handsome young man, but if he turned up at my front door for sex, I’d tell him to go fuck himself.”
Lol, love you baby.
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Kristina,
Very nice pictures. I never heard of the Harbin International Ice and Snow Sculpture Festival until now. That first pic is my favorite and is just amazing. Is the third picture of some ice castle with the colored lights inside? I saw a program of an ice castle/hotel they create every year. I think it was in Norway or Sweden.
TLGK,
I have no idea where those pictures came from. I remember when Stiletto talked about getting a dog and of course her love of polar bears. Shortly after hearing about her interest of a dog, I received those pictures so I had to forward them to Whynot. I think the email I received with pictures may have stated where they were taken, but I deleted it a long time ago.
Whynot, Microdot,
The history is pretty sordid as tattooing became a mark of people who identified themselves as being outside of normal society.
I have to agree with that statement. I never wanted one myself, but it is all the fad for younger people around here and some older people who want to make a statement. I think it is a decision based on wanting to be different from the norm, but some people can be obsessed. I have a friend from my hometown who is totally covered with tattoos. He has nothing on his face or neck and nothing on his hands or feet. If he is wearing a long sleeved shirt and long pants you would never know. His pictures were published in a tattoo magazine while he was wearing a thong. Viewing that rag was pretty wild. To some, he is a freak, but he is a funny guy in a sordid and sarcastic manner. He is borderline anarchist, but no less my friend because he has tattoos. In fact, my brother and I saw the magazine and never mentioned the tattoos, but were just commenting on how our heterosexuality was in serious jeopardy by seeing him in a thong. I also have a friend who got a tattoo of his girl friend’s name “Linda” on his arm. That relationship didn’t work too well and his wife, Mary is not too pleased.
The first tattoo picture is of some asshole in prison.
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A lot of people feel the power of symbols and also use tattoos as a rite of passage. I have seen so much tattooing that is attractive and a way for a person to express their personality. I have seen tattooing that was just plain stupid and done for all the wrong reasons.
Can you imagine the loser who gets his girlfriends face tattooed on his arm, so he can threaten to cut his arm off if she ever leaves him?I knew a person who had his face tattooed in NYC. He had the compulsion to do it ever since he was a young teen and asked tattoo artists if they would do it for him. They all turned him down. He went ahead and started to do it himself and the results were totally amateurish….finally, a real tattoo artist “fixed” the terriblke work he had done and made it fairly artistic. The guy was a fairly good looking person and I cannot understand the compulsion he had to disfigure himself.
He worked for a few years in Manhattan as a messenger and was known as a real nice guy, but a character. Funny, I never really thought he had much personality outside of his tattoo obsession….I think if he hadn’t followed his tattoo obsession, he could have ended up in real trouble…now he’s the last person you would expect to commit a crime…too easy to identify!
He ended up working at the Coney Island Sideshow and was doing Carnival circuits all over America as the Tattooed man…he went on to cover his entire body, and I do mean his entire body with tattoos.I have many friends with tattoos and most are interesting personal designs. I have designed tattoos for people.
In the mid 90’s, I researched Russian Criminal tattooing and actually presented a lecture with slides on the subject as part of the Museum of Natural History’s exhibit on Body Art back in 1998.
I have designed fake tattos for Robert DeNiro, Sean Penn, Paul Simons Musical, The Capeman, Once Were Warriors, the New Zealand movie about Maoris in the modern world, even The Muppets Treasure Island….Many many other projects.
I find the history of tattooing pretty fascinating as it is another part of the many things that humans do creatively and socially….As I said, I have seen a lot of great tattoos and a lot of pathetic tattoos, but I find the entire subject very interesting from and artistic and a socialogical point and as an observer.
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Microdot,
As I said, I have seen a lot of great tattoos and a lot of pathetic tattoos, but I find the entire subject very interesting from and artistic and a socialogical point and as an observer .
Being skilled in design of tattoos and not actually having one yourself, makes me ponder if I am not alone in heeding the wisdom of Popeye, Tutor the Turtle, and various themes of fractured fairy tales.
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Microdot,
I am pleased to know that in the second picture, the man was painted and not tattooed. It is a very beautiful artwork and congratulation if you are the designer.
But I find the first one revolting, plus the skin head and nazi cross make me want to vomit.
Another thing I don’t like at all is piercings. Sometimes I see customers with things hanging out of their ears and nose and eyelids and everywhere, and I think: you are a fucking asshole to have paid for this revolting result, I could have done a better job for free kickboxing the shit out of you, and if you find me a machine gun I’ll make you some real piercings.
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I recommend all of John Burdett’s books, an interesting one is “Bangkok Tattoo.”
I too do have any tatoos. When I was young, in the U/S. post offices, there would be photos of wanted criminals. Underneath there would be a physical description: 5′ 10″; brown hair, brown eyes; tattoo of two turtles fornicating on right bicep.
I never wanted any identifying marks just in case I wound up on the Post Office wall.
Also, the nifty looking tattoo at age 25 may seem woefully dated 25 or 30 years later.
TLGK
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Mr P,
“Being skilled in design of tattoos and not actually having one yourself, makes me ponder if I am not alone in heeding the wisdom of Popeye, Tutor the Turtle, and various themes of fractured fairy tales.”
Can you explain what this means please?
I really love these 3 pictures you sent of the dog and polar bear. I agree with Kristina that it makes me wonder of the ability of animals to understand each other in a way that humans cannot. In each picture, I try to imagine what they think, in their animal way:
1) PB: Hey you asshole dog, what do you want? A fight? Take a look at my paw.
Dog: no no, I’m not even barking, I just want to be friends, I’m tied by a chain by a fucking human being who is roasting his ass near a fire inside while I am freezing here.2) PB: Oh, that’s terrible, I’m sorry, I’m so used to fucking dogs barking their heads off so that humans can come out with their guns and shoot me. Let me give you a cuddle and warm you up. I’ve got even more fat layers than Barb and I’m nearly as hairy as her.
3) Dog: Thank you thank you, I love you, I promise I’ll never bark when I see a polar bear. Please come again tomorrow.
There are more pictures of these 2 animals that you sent, but I didn’t want to make the article too huge, lol. What I’d like is to find the originals, hoping they are in very high resolution so I could print posters of them. BTW, Bonbon sent me a high resolution picture of her polar bear sculpture.
“Is the third picture of some ice castle with the colored lights inside?”
For me, it looks like a ship. It looks like there are some people on the deck.
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Stiletto,
“Hey you asshole dog, what do you want? A fight? Take a look at my paw.”
LOLLLL
“Let me give you a cuddle and warm you up. I’ve got even more fat layers than Barb and I’m nearly as hairy as her.”
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLL, I am going to pee again, LOLLL
“For me, it looks like a ship. It looks like there are some people on the deck.”
It looks like one to me also. And if the black spots are people, the ship must be enormous!
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Yeah, there are a lot of weird people crawling about out there. Body modification is an obsession for many of them. It is an addiction, like plastic surgery is addicitve I have seen humans who wanted to turn themselves into reptiles and they look at it as if their bodies were there art. It is a form of total control. The reprile guy had his teeth sharpened, his body covered with scale tattoo design and silicone beads placed under his skin to give the scales texture. This may gross you out, but he had his tongue surgically “spit to be like a reptiles and wore special contact lenses.
Why? I guess the answer is because he wanted to and could.I agree with TLGK that tattoos are usually a cosmetic decision basewd on vanity that one tends to regret years later….I saw a guy in St, Yriex la Perche last summer in shorts and I thought he was wearing green tights! He was covered with tattots that had spread and fadded as he got older.
Mr. Politeness, you have lost me with the Yertle the Turtle analogy, please enlighten me and Stilletto!
I’ve had to paint nude women and men, to get the job done, one has to adopt a totally clinical attitude and most important, put the model at ease. Usually when we were done, the person would look in the mirror and gasp at what we had transformed them into.
Somewhere on this blog, there are pictures of a woman I covered with a 19th century English Wall paper design for a Fashion shoot for Harpers Bazarre Magazine.Now to change the subject, I am asking whyhot to put these three pictures of a person who has chosen to modify her body in a completely different fashion…I think these pictures were taken at Burger King drive thru window in Toledo, Ohio and as to who the subject is? I’m not talkin!
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Microdot,
“This may gross you out, but he had his tongue surgically “spit to be like a reptiles and wore special contact lenses.”
Beurk, I think Stiletto is right, and people like that should spend time in places where just surviving is nearly impossible. That would cure their urges to spend lot of money on such disgusting things.
“Mr. Politeness, you have lost me with the Yertle the Turtle analogy, please enlighten me and Stilletto!”
And me too, LOL!
“I think these pictures were taken at Burger King drive thru window in Toledo, Ohio and as to who the subject is? I’m not talkin!”
LOL, but I don’t see her bible! Did she eat it?
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m,
In the bottom photo it looks as if she is giving the one fingered salute.
TLGK
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Microdot,
“I’ve had to paint nude women and men, to get the job done, one has to adopt a totally clinical attitude and most important, put the model at ease.”
Putting the model at ease is my forte. I’ll send you my business card. Women only, though.
Stiletto,
“1) PB: Hey you asshole dog, what do you want? A fight? Take a look at my paw. …”
Nice little sketch here - well done. Yeah, posters of these dog/polar bear shots would look impressive.
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Stiletto,
“2) PB: Oh, that’s terrible, I’m sorry, I’m so used to fucking dogs barking their heads off so that humans can come out with their guns and shoot me. Let me give you a cuddle and warm you up. I’ve got even more fat layers than Barb and I’m nearly as hairy as her”
Lol, oh my, ah hem … no comment, lol.
TLGK,
“In the bottom photo it looks as if she is giving the one fingered salute.”
I think she might be licking the remnants of that “finger-licking-good” bible burger. BTW, speaking of “salutes”, do you know what the official Aussie salute is?
ShitStirrer,
“Putting the model at ease is my forte. I’ll send you my business card. Women only, though.”
I’m with you 150%.
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WhyNot,
If I knew, it escapes me now.
TLGK
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TLGK,
“If I knew, it escapes me now”
Ahh, what a sad lapse of essential international cultural knowledge, my friend; let me refresh your failing memory:
I bet you and most people think Oz is the land of kangaroos and koalas, right? Oh no sir, how gravely mistaken you are here; Oz is the land of flies.
There are more flies in every cubic centimeter of the atmosphere in Oz than molecules of H2O in your mountains of snow in your Colorado driveway.
Now imagine being a soldier standing stiff awaiting at an important parade (say, the fucking queen of fucking England decides to honor those down-under savages with her visit for example); now while you’re standing there like an ex-dodo, 5000 flies land on your nose, get into your nostrils and ears. Wouldn’t you itch to give the queen the salute of your life?
Here is a pretty good article about it
And here is an excerpt, just to get your appetite going:
Lords of the Fly
“I am especially pleased that the Congress is being held in Australia because of the special importance of flies in Australian cultural life, from the first explorers experience with bushflies to the great aussie salute.” Dr David Yeates
The Kangaroo is usually held up as the animal that represents the essence of Australia. However in terms of influencing Australian culture, the Kangaroo is no match for the fly. Although the fly doesn’t appear on any flags, it has shaped everything from the manner an Australian speaks to the style of Australian cuisine. In terms of speech, it has been said that the Australian accent is a product of Australians breathing through their noses for fear that flies might blow into their mouths.
Flies have also inspired a new style of body language. Known as the “Australian Salute“, Australians have turned flicking away a fly into an art form. Farmers use the salute to convey a regal presence, almost as if they are a billionaire waving his hands to stop his staff bothering him. So dignified does it look, some farmers even salute when flies aren’t even bothering them.
On the beach, elegant ladies may salute with a flick of the fingers. This can be quite sexy as it can draw a male’s attention to the sensuous nature of her hands. In fact, one of Australia’s proudest moments occurred in 1954 when the Queen first visited Australia. Menaced by flies, she adopted the salute and so won great applause at home and abroad. Onlookers felt that after years of dealing with convict taunts, the Queen’s acceptance of a local custom proved that Australia had finally come of age.
Next I’ll tell you all about Aussie mozzies if you wish.
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Stiletto, Microdot,
Being skilled in design of tattoos and not actually having one yourself, makes me ponder if I am not alone in heeding the wisdom of Popeye, Tutor the Turtle, and various themes of fractured fairy tales.
Pertaining to the cartoon references and the decision to get tattoos. Popeye the sailor man used to often say “I am what I am and that’s all that I am”
Tutor the turtle was always fucking things up and getting himself in trouble. When he was in major peril, he would call upon Mr Wizard who would save his little shelled ass just in the nick of time. Mr. Wizard would always tell Tutor “Be who you is and not who you is not, those who do dis, are the happiest lot.
So in other words, what Popeye and Mr Wizard were saying is that it is not necessary to get tattoos to be a nonconformist, you can also burn things.
-
HEEEYAHHHH!
Yes sir….I guess it is a generational thing. I never got a chance to see Yertle the Turtle as a child so the profound wisdom of the wizard was never imparted to me. The burning things part, well, I surely can relate to that!Once, I almost got a tattoo. I was going to get a realistic fly tattooed on my back…but on further relflection, it seemed a masochistic impulse. Hey Man, you got a fly on your back…SWAT!
One of my oldest friends who still lives in Michigan showed up for breakfast one morning when he was 18 years old with a very neat little marijuana leaf tattooed on his bicep. His mother, a normally tolerant mild mannered woman, decked him, literally….He still has the tattoo….
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Microdot,
My brother used to have a skin head as a neighbor. He had the SS symbol on his face (Nazi SS not Shitstirrer). He had his arms and hands covered with some Aryan bullshit and had some other nazi tattoos on his throat. He said he was a plumber and was pissed off because he couldn’t find a job. Adolph the plumber can’t find a job. That is a mystery that may never be solved.
Stiletto, TLGK,
I found this about the polar bears and dog.
http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/polardog.asp
Stiletto,
Here are the google images of the pictures. Maybe you can find one here with good resolution that you can get made into a print. If not, You should be able to find them online. I did see one site that sold prints, but they were 100 dollars. There has to be cheaper ones than that.
http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&source=hp&q=dog%20and%20polar%20bear&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wi
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Mr P,
“So in other words, what Popeye and Mr Wizard were saying is that it is not necessary to get tattoos to be a nonconformist, you can also burn things.”
Ok. I am more confused than before, I think, lol. Except the last part which says I can burn things even if I don’t have tattoos, yes? This is good because I don’t have any tattoo and there are lots of things I would like to burn, like the Elysée Palace, especially when Sarkozy is inside.
Who is Popeye?
Thank you very much for researching the photos. I looked but the highest resolution I found was around 700 pixels by something. I’m going to see if it is possible to contact Norbert Rosing or National Geographic. I’ll ask my slave WhyNot to do it, lol.
Here are 2 more pictures:
Look at the size of that paw!
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Popeye the sailor man
he lives in the garbage can
he eats old potatoes
and rotten tomatoes
He’s Popeye the sailor manPopeye was an American Cartoon figure who first appeared in the 1930’s in the newspapers and then went on for many years in animated cartoons.
There was a little jig…an old fashioned type of music associated with a sailors dance..very fast melody that was part of the Popey cartoon music and I used to use it as a practice piece when I played bass guitar to learn popping technique and to build up speed…I haven’t played it in years.
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Microdot,
“Popeye the sailor man
he lives in the garbage can
he eats old potatoes
and rotten tomatoes
He’s Popeye the sailor man”LOLLL, I don’t think Stiletto wants him as a customer, LOL.
Stiletto,
“Look at the size of that paw!”
Yes, it is incredible, the paw is as big as the whole dog.
Mr P,
I read in the link you gave of the man who took the photographs that the bear came back every day for a week to play with the dogs. What a beautiful story.
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Stiletto,
“This is good because I don’t have any tattoo and there are lots of things I would like to burn, like the Elysée Palace, especially when Sarkozy is inside.”
Lol, you crack me up. There’s only one like you. Some might say “just as well”.
“I’ll ask my slave WhyNot to do it”
Sounds like a good idea. Plus it adds another title to his already impressive panoply. Come on, WhyNot commie bastard frog slime toad … err … help me, Mr P … motherfucker cocksucker slave asshole! Get off you ass, the lady’s waiting!
-
Thanks for the link Mr. P
In 1981 0r 1982, my roommate from law school got married in her home town of Gunnison on the Western Slope. The motel in which I stayed had a stuffed polar bear standing rampart in the lobby. It was about 8 and 1/2 feet tall. The polar bear is the largest terrestrial carnivore.
For those unfamiliar w/ Popeye, the way he spoke, it came out, “I yam what I yam and that’s all that I yam.”
Here are the original lyrics to Popeye.
- Popeye
I’m Popeye the Sailor Man,
I’m Popeye the Sailor Man.
I’m strong to the finich
Cause I eats me spinach.
I’m Popeye the Sailor Man.I’m one tough Gazookus
Which hates all Palookas
Wot ain’t on the up and square.
I biffs ‘em and buffs ‘em
And always out roughs ‘em
But none of ‘em gets nowhere.If anyone dares to risk my “Fisk”,
It’s “Boff” an’ it’s “Wham” un’erstan’?
So keep “Good Be-hav-or”
That’s your one life saver
With Popeye the Sailor Man.I’m Popeye the Sailor Man,
I’m Popeye the Sailor Man.
I’m strong to the finich
Cause I eats me spinach.
I’m Popeye the Sailor Man.I confess, I am more of a Betty Boop guy. Some of the Betty Boop cartons are surreal.
WhyNot. Expect some pix from me tomorrow or the next day.
TLGK
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Mr P,
“He had his arms and hands covered with some Aryan bullshit and had some other nazi tattoos on his throat. He said he was a plumber and was pissed off because he couldn’t find a job. Adolph the plumber can’t find a job. That is a mystery that may never be solved.”
Lollll, nice one ;-]
Stiletto,
“I’ll ask my slave WhyNot to do it, lol.”
Sure, honey bun. I just sent Norbert Rosing an e-mail. We’ll see what happens. In the meantime, check out his site, you’ll love it:
ShitStirrer,
“slime toad … err … help me, Mr P”
Yeah, I lost track myself.
-
The term slave boy is just a bit horrific and passe’ even if we are talking about Whynot. Perhaps we could compromise with Cabana Boy?
I am out of here for the week for a trip to the midwest. The leaves seem to be in the peak of their fall colors, so the drive should be more interesting. Have a kick ass week.
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Mr P,
“Perhaps we could compromise with Cabana Boy?”
Cabana boy? What does it mean? It makes me think of a hut in Tahiti with people naked everywhere and flowers in the hair and pubic hair, lol.
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Stiletto,
“a hut in Tahiti with people naked everywhere and flowers in the hair and pubic hair”
Right. This gives me some ideas on how to woo women the right way. Let me stick a big bunch of roses in my pubic hair and parade in front of my potential enamoured damsels.
—Ok, now for a bit of trivia:
Last night I was chatting on Skype with an American friend of mine, and at some stage wrote “we are being shat upon from a great height”.
She laughed and asked me whether it was the Oz way of conjugating the verb “to shit”.
It isn’t, and here is the explanation I gave her - true dink, fair dinkum!
When I was young and handsome (yeah yeah, cut it out you guys at the back), I worked at some stage for Roland Australia (in Sydney) as a technician, repairing electronic keyboards, synths, guitar amps, Boss pedals, digital reverb units and shit. For those of you who don’t know, Roland is a Japanese giant of professional musical equipment.
The repair team was small: me, another young dude named Michael whose hair dragged to the floor or just about, and our superviser, Bob, an older guy who was from UK.
Bob was a real radical in his own way, a real “pommy bastard” as Aussies would call him.
The repair department where we worked was in constant battle with the upper management of Roland Australia. Bob was regularly fuming about “them fucking cunts upstairs, oy!“, and one of his regular cute phrases was “here we go again, Mike and Phil, look at this shit! Once again we’re being shat upon from a great height!“.
It stuck to me ever since. I think it beats Sheakpeare by a long shot.
Now remains the question: if “shit” is present and “shat” is past tense, what is the past participle?
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Whynot,
“Let me stick a big bunch of roses in my pubic hair and parade in front of my potential enamoured damsels.”
LOL, be careful of your prick, roses are very prickly!
“if “shit” is present and “shat” is past tense, what is the past participle?”
Euh… shatten?
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WhyNot,
“one of his regular cute phrases was “here we go again, Mike and Phil, look at this shit! Once again we’re being shat upon from a great height!“.
It stuck to me ever since. I think it beats Sheakpeare by a long shot.”Lol, I like the look of the expression. And yes, I think it’s much better than Sheakspeare because it’s easy to understand. I tried to read some Sheakspeare and could not understand any sentence. I like your Bob’s other expression too “them fucking cunts upstairs, oy!” lol.
Valérie,
“be careful of your prick, roses are very prickly!”
Lol
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Stiletto,
“I tried to read some Sheakspeare and could not understand any sentence.”
Don’t worry, you’re not the only one.
WhyNot,
Nice little story of your days in Oz, thanks.
“Now remains the question: if “shit” is present and “shat” is past tense, what is the past participle?”
I’m hesitating between shitted and ca-caed.
-
Shitstirrer,
“I’m hesitating between shitted and ca-caed.”
Cacaed??? LOLLLL, do you use “caca” in English? Is it just in America? This is so funny. Here caca means shit, but only as a noun, not a verb.
Whynot, do you say caca in Australian?
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Valérie,
“Whynot, do you say caca in Australian?”
Not in the least. I didn’t know it was a known term in American. Dianne never used it. Then again, I’ve noticed that American uses a lot more FR words and expressions than UK and Australian.
ShitStirrer,
“Nice little story of your days in Oz, thanks”
You’re welcome. I was perusing through some photos, thinking in particular of the subject of musical gear, and I found an interesting one. This was taken in my home studio in Oz. It’s pretty lousy as all I had then was the very first digital camera to see the light, a Sony job with a floppy drive to store the pics.
I hope you appreciate all the litter on the floor, lol.
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WhyNot,
Looking at the picture in your comment 63: in the bottom rack on the left, am I right in identifying 2 Phase Linear amplifiers? Are they for your public address system? What speakers do you use and what crossover system do you use?
“I hope you appreciate all the litter on the floor, lol.”
I would not mind it if it meant I could use all this equipment.
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WhyNot,
No difference between past simple and past participle.
Valerie, et toute le monde,
What is the difference between “caca” and “merde?”
TLGK
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TLGK,
“What is the difference between “caca” and “merde?””
Technically, none. They refer to the same thing, i.e. “excrement” (same word in FR btw, except for the accent (excrément)).
From a usage point of view, “merde” is really the exact equivalent of “shit” in EN; it’s slighly vulgar but not a really offensive word, plus it is used as a light curse word in exactly the same way, for instance: “Oh merde, j’ai recommencé!” (= “Oh shit, I did it again!”).
“caca” is a childish term, meaning it is only used by very young children. A bit like “poopoo”. It doesn’t have the vulgar/cuss connotation “merde” has; it’s a kind of euphemism for “merde”. For instance Mom or Dad will say to little Jonny “Allez, on va faire un petit pipi et caca” (= “Come on, let’s do a little weewee and poopoo”). It is never used as a curse word like “merde” is - it would sound totally ridiculous. Well, maybe our Canadian friends use it this way - I’ve heard them use pretty weird French, lol.
-
Kristina,
“in the bottom rack on the left, am I right in identifying 2 Phase Linear amplifiers? Are they for your public address system? What speakers do you use and what crossover system do you use?”
You have sharp eyes, my friend: yes, 2 Phase Linear 700B, heavily modified (electronically) by a clever design of mine, even if I say so myself.
As you can perhaps see, the top one is mounted upside down in the rack box; this is because each one is bolted through the rack by its huge and heavy transformer at the back, failing which the torque caused by their weight would make the front panels rip the vertical mounting bars.
The crossover is an electronic one I designed and built myself, stereo, 3-way, with 18 dB/octave crossover frequencies at 120 Hz and 5kHz. It is built into the mixer, which I also designed and built myself.
Speakers are: 2 x EV18 cabinets for the bass (18″ Electrovoice 400W RMS drivers, teflon coated voice coils); 2 x Bose 802 for midrange; 4 x Fane high power horn drivers for treble, which I mounted into 2 boxes I built.
The result is a reasonably powerful system suitable for small to medium venues with a near hi-fi sound quality thanks to the Bose speakers which reproduce the greater mid-range area (where the ear is most sensitive to distortion) while being relieved from producing low bass and high frequencies where their efficiency is very poor. This allows me to drive the “caca” out of them in terms of high sound pressure level without blowing them up, lol.
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WhyNot,
“yes, 2 Phase Linear 700B, heavily modified (electronically) by a clever design of mine, even if I say so myself. ”
Can you describe these modifications, please? Many Phase Linear amplifiers were used in public address systems here in rock bands because of their outstanding sound quality and relative low cost in view of their enormous output power, but they had the unfortunate drawback of failing in a drastic manner regularly and exploding speakers in a spectacular fashion.
“The crossover is an electronic one I designed and built myself, stereo, 3-way, with 18 dB/octave crossover frequencies at 120 Hz and 5kHz. It is built into the mixer, which I also designed and built myself.”
I am puzzled about something: 2 stereo amplifiers are not enough to drive a 3-way stereo speaker system, and yet too much to drive a mono one. How is your amplifier-speaker system interconnected?
-
Kristina,
“but they had the unfortunate drawback of failing in a drastic manner regularly and exploding speakers in a spectacular fashion.”
This sounds most exciting. Do you have any pictures?
-
Kristina and Shitstirrer,
“This sounds most exciting. Do you have any pictures?”
LOLLL, I couldn’t find a picture of an exploding speaker but I found one of an exploding mobile phone, LOL.
(Whynot/Stiletto, picture please)
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Valérie,
“but I found one of an exploding mobile phone”
Very nice indeed; hey, I got the very same model!
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Kristina,
“Can you describe these modifications, please? Many Phase Linear amplifiers were used in public address systems here in rock bands because of their outstanding sound quality and relative low cost in view of their enormous output power, but they had the unfortunate drawback of failing in a drastic manner regularly and exploding speakers in a spectacular fashion.”
Yes, quite so, same thing in every other country. The problem is that the Phase Linear amp was designed to be the ultimate hi-fi amplifier, and as a result has no output protection whatsoever. It doesn’t even have current limiting safeguards.
In particular, if one the output stage power transistors goes emitter-collector short circuit, then your speaker instantly receives the 120V DC treatment which in pratice means its cone will fly across the room and hopefully hit Bush or some other equally useless cunt.
The other drawback of not having any current limiting is that the output stage is not short-circuit proof: if one of your speakers goes short circuit, then the power transistors will happily blow up long before the amp’s fuses melt. If you’re really unlucky, all 20 of the high power transistors will desintegrate within a few microseconds.
I devised several mods to remedy these shortcomings, but it’s rather lengthy to explain and I fear I might put you and everyone else to sleep if I attempt to describe them.
Valérie, ShitStirrer,
I quite like your cell phone; it has one definite advantage: nobody is going to steal from you.
-
Whynot,
“then your speaker instantly receives the 120V DC treatment which in pratice means its cone will fly across the room and hopefully hit Bush or some other equally useless cunt.”
LOLLLL, can you aim the speaker at Sarkozy? What does DC mean (in “120 V DC”)?
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Valérie,
“What does DC mean (in “120 V DC”)?”
It means Direct Current. It’s like a battery: you have a positive and a negative. This in opposition to AC (Alternative Current) such as you have in your wall sockets where you plug in your appliances. 120 volts must mean that it is the DC supplies rails of the amplifier, one being +120 V, the other -120 V. WhyNot?
WhyNot,
“I devised several mods to remedy these shortcomings, but it’s rather lengthy to explain and I fear I might put you and everyone else to sleep if I attempt to describe them.”
You will not put me to sleep. Please describe them.
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Kristina,
“120 volts must mean that it is the DC supplies rails of the amplifier, one being +120 V, the other -120 V. WhyNot?”
Exactly. Working on these amps is as dangerous as working on switching power supplies. You really have to watch were you stick your fingers. And speaking of “watch”, don’t ever wear one while repairing these monsters, especially if it has a metallic band; same thing for rings and any other metallic jewelry on your fingers and wrists. Take them all off.
“You will not put me to sleep. Please describe them.”
Ok. Here is the description of the modifications, of which I’ll dig out the circuit diagrams when I can find them. First, starting with the output stage, I added a small electronic circuit which monitors any DC offset; if something significant occurs, this circuit fires a 250 A (continuous, 4,000 A peak) triac whose main terminals are connected to the amp’s output and ground, effectively immediately short circuiting the output (within 50 microseconds).
This means your speakers are saved from being blown up. On the other hand, it means the some of the amp’s fuses (5 of them) will blow, and if you’re unlucky some of the power transistors will blow up as well. But that’s still a lot cheaper than having a 1200 euro woofer reconed. Plus it’s something you can do yourself (replacing the fuses and power transistors, I mean).
The other thing I did was design a mod to include current limiting of the output stage, or rather a monitoring of the breakdown voltage/current capability of the output stage: if it goes beyond safe limits (for the type of output transistors used), then the ouput signal is automatically limited. This of course can introduce harmonic distortion (if you are over-driving the amp), but it’s a whole lot better than blowing the shit out of your amp and speakers. Besides if you’re over-driving the amp to clipping point, the resulting harmonic distortion will be much worse anyway.
Lastly, I have a power-on delay circuit which fires the above-mentioned triac (thus short circuiting the output) for a few seconds. This is just icing on the cake, and is simply there to avoid loud pops caused by the mixer feeding the amp when you switch the system on.
Also, I pissed off the original output stage power transistors in favor of ones with much higher current/voltage/breakdown ratings.
While I blew up countless speakers in the early days I used the PA, after doing these mods I never had to recone a single speaker nor change output transistors again for the last few decades of using these very fine amplifiers. So, I guess I did something right.
“I am puzzled about something: 2 stereo amplifiers are not enough to drive a 3-way stereo speaker system, and yet too much to drive a mono one. How is your amplifier-speaker system interconnected?”
Ha! It’s because the photo is deceiving: while the front only shows the front panels of 2 Phase Linear 700Bs, there is inside the rack a third stereo amp, of much lower output power and which is used to drive the 4 horn tweeters. It’s a 120W RMS amp (2 x 60W), built at the back of the rack.
So the interconnection is quite simple: one of the Phase Linear amps drives the 2 EV bass bins, the other the 2 Bose speakers, and the little amp drives the 2 pairs of Fane tweeters. So yes, the entire PA is in stereo.
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Sorry I haven’t posted for a while. I haven’t been on line very much and I have been getting ready to leave for 2 weeks, which I will Sunday morning.
Maybe I’ll have some interesting pics of New york when I get back!
Meanwhile, enjoy French politics! I am!
a bientot -
Microdot,
Congrats in advance to the blushing groom and bride. Safe travels and may your special day and all hereafter be nothing short of bliss.
In other news,,, this day, I happened to drive over the Maumee river and I did notice something very peculiar. I wasn’t sure what it was, but it had a brownish hue. The enormity was most striking. This object seemed to displace 3500 tons not unlike the HMS Victory and visions of Trafalgar overcame me. I swore I saw Lord Nelson himself and what appeared to be 3,000 flies in dress whites on the bow. I tried to view the flags but I was cruising at 113 kph. It was a blur, but for some reason it was disturbing.
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WhyNot,
It seems very interesting and innovative, especially the idea of short circuiting the output instead of open circuiting it via a relay. I would love to see the schematics.
“This means your speakers are saved from being blown up. On the other hand, it means the some of the amp’s fuses (5 of them) will blow, and if you’re unlucky some of the power transistors will blow up as well.”
Does your second modification (limiting output current) ensure the fuses and output transistors will not blow up when the triac short circuits the amplifier’s output?
Microdot,
Have a safe trip.
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Hello everyone,
I see that I have missed some shat conversations. When I saw the word “shat” I immediatly thought of Aesop.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aesop
Aesop’s Fables is one of my favorite books of all time even more so than “Rabbit and Skunk and the Big Fight”.
I must direct you to this fable -
THE CAMEL WHO SHAT IN THE RIVER
A camel was crossing a swiftly flowing river. He shat and immediately saw his own dung floating in front of him, carried by the rapidity of the current. “What is that there?” he asked himself. “That which was behind me I now see pass in front of me.”
This applies to a situation where the rabble and the idiots hold sway rather than the eminent and the sensible.
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WhyNot,
“I quite like your cell phone; it has one definite advantage: nobody is going to steal from you.”
I fucking hope so. Took me long enough to steal mine from an unsuspecting dude. I just had to. It matches my GPS.
Mr P,
“A camel was crossing a swiftly flowing river. He shat and immediately saw his own dung floating in front of him, carried by the rapidity of the current. “What is that there?” he asked himself. “That which was behind me I now see pass in front of me.” ”
Funny you should say that: last time I shat in the county’s olympic swimming pool, the very same thing happened to me, and I’m not even a camel.
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Mr Pee,
“A camel was crossing a swiftly flowing river. He shat and immediately saw his own dung floating in front of him, carried by the rapidity of the current.”
LOLLL, but wait, if the camel was crossing the river, after he shat, his dung would be on his side, not in front of him!
ShitStirrer,
“Funny you should say that: last time I shat in the county’s olympic swimming pool, the very same thing happened to me, and I’m not even a camel.”
LOLLLL, maybe you’re a dromedary? How many humps do you have on your back?
-
Whynot,
Exactly. Working on these amps is as dangerous as working on switching power supplies. You really have to watch were you stick your fingers. And speaking of “watch”, don’t ever wear one while repairing these monsters, especially if it has a metallic band; same thing for rings and any other metallic jewelry on your fingers and wrists. Take them all off.
That is so right. I remember working on cathode ray tubes (CRTs) years ago. There was a problem with the 2nd anode or the object that looked like a suction cup that connected the high voltage to the CRT itself. I had a ring on and the 20,000 volts arced over to my ring. It was a very pretty blue color and I immediately pulled my hand away. I then felt this tingly feeling in my finger. Soon afterward, I felt that tingly numbness feeling move up to my wrist, then forearm, and then my entire arm was tingling/numb. I felt fine in general, but then that feeling moved to my shoulder, then my neck and then my head. It was a great buzz and didn’t cost anything. I remember sitting there thinking how cool everything looked, the colors, the colors. All sounds were somewhat muted and serene. I felt that I was close to the border of an unexplored dimension of coolness. So close, so very close, but the intensity waned. 30 minutes later, that feeling went away and I was overcome with an unexplainable sadness. I then wrapped my head in aluminum foil, turned the crt back on and stuck my fucking head back in there.
-
Valérie,
LOLLL, but wait, if the camel was crossing the river, after he shat, his dung would be on his side, not in front of him!
I do see your point, but I suspect that this particular camel must have faced some sort of obstruction, possibly a large rock or shrubbery in the river that forced him to temporarily divert his travels downstream and that must have been the actual moment of this historic philosophical shat.
Other historians have actually linked this fable to Aesops cousin Alfred who also wrote fables. The original parchments are incomplete, but some believe this fable was originally written by Alfred under the title of “The spider monkey who cast seed whilst viewing prehistoric cave paintings of hoofed animals”. But it’s all speculation at this time.
-
Mr P,
“I then wrapped my head in aluminum foil, turned the crt back on and stuck my fucking head back in there.”
Excellent initiative, my friend; I’ve done the same thing countless times and it worked every single time. One only needs to look at my face (as so rightly depicted in your photos of me) to be convinced of the immense benefits.
The only ecstatically comparable sensation is to sit on a TO-3 case power transistor of a faulty switching power supply and turn the power on. Mind-blowing results, literally!
Kristina,
“It seems very interesting and innovative, especially the idea of short circuiting the output instead of open circuiting it via a relay. I would love to see the schematics.”
Yeah, the idea came to me following my sex addiction. Short circuiting is GOOD and WHOLESOME, open circuiting is not. In fact nothing more rejoicing than a good short-circuit fuck; conversely, nothing more frustrating than an open-circuit fuck - it leads to premature ejaculation and all kinds of unspeakable diseases that make you go blind. Pardon my French.
Ok, I’ll e-mail you the schematics when I find them. I haven’t patented it, so make sure you charge the hell out of those Moscow punk bands.
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Mr Pee,
“I suspect that this particular camel must have faced some sort of obstruction, possibly a large rock or shrubbery in the river that forced him to temporarily divert his travels downstream and that must have been the actual moment of this historic philosophical shat.”
LOLL, I hope your camel doesn’t come to shit in the Seine river, we have enough pollution.
-
Whynot,
“In fact nothing more rejoicing than a good short-circuit fuck; conversely, nothing more frustrating than an open-circuit fuck”
Ok, what’s a short-circuit fuck and what’s an open-circuit fuck?
-
Stiletto,
“Ok, what’s a short-circuit fuck and what’s an open-circuit fuck?”
Geee, don’t tell me you need a drawing.
-
WhyNot,
“Geee, don’t tell me you need a drawing.”
Now, that’s a splendid idea! Let me see if I can dig something out.
-
Stiletto and Whynot,
““Ok, what’s a short-circuit fuck and what’s an open-circuit fuck?”
Geee, don’t tell me you need a drawing.”LOLLL, I think a short-circuit one makes lots of sparks but there is nothing happening in an open-circuit one.
Shitstirrer,
“Now, that’s a splendid idea! Let me see if I can dig something out.”
Yes please, I’m curious, LOL!
-
A spider monkey called Beau,
Painted the cave at Lascaux,
Aurochs and deer,
And some bison, that’s clear,
While flinging his seed with his toe.TLGK
-
TLGK,
“A spider monkey called Beau …”
Lol, did your client get a not guilty verdict after this speech?
-
Stiletto,
The client got off. I was convicted though.
TLGK
-
This monkey named Beau had caught
A rare hoofed animal nether region rot
He’d wheeze and would cough
Until his testicles fell off
And that fucker looks just like Whynot -
Mr P,
“A rare hoofed animal … And that fucker looks just like Whynot”
LOLL, this makes me think of fables I read when I was a child, and there were creatures that looked half man half goat.
TLGK,
“The client got off. I was convicted though.”
LOL, what did they convict you of?
-
Valerie,
Limericking without a license; public doggerel; affront to poesy.
TLGK
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Valérie,
“this makes me think of fables I read when I was a child, and there were creatures that looked half man half goat.”
They aren’t fables; look at Bush, Putin and Sarkozy.
-
WhyNot,
“They aren’t fables; look at Bush, Putin and Sarkozy.”
Yes, every time they open their mouth to say something, their noses grow one meter longer.
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WhyNot,
This just in: George W. Bush is no longer president on the United States. Even though he will probably go down in history as one of he U.S.’s worst presidents, he is yesterday’s news. In the past 2 months, the only time anyone here has seen him publicly is when he attended two sporting events.
Insulting him is passe b/c although the effect of his ineptitude lives on, he is no longer a player. You may as well insult Mitterand or Yeltsin (I know, Boris has gone to the big vodka distillery in the sky).
But insulting George W. Bush in the present tense is just stupid. Besides, there are many half goat half man heads of state, currently in power, to wit: Silvio Berlusconi, Robert Mugabe, Hugo Chavez, Alexander Lukashenko, Gurbanguly Berdimuhamedow; and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, by way of example but limitation.
Other than that, keep up the good work.
Regards,
The Loop Garoo Kid
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TLGK,
“This just in: George W. Bush is no longer president on the United States.”
Geee, thanks for letting me know, I could have sworn he was still USA’s commander in chief. Blame in on inferior EU information technology. It takes time for those little bytes to travel from USA to Europe, you know!
Anyway, here is a pic I chiselled out of an exquisite PowerPoint slideshow Jeanette sent me; unless I fucked it up, this photo (the first out that slideshow) was taken in Jeanette’s homeland (meaning where she was born and raised - not where she lives now).
Jeanette,
Please tell me I got the right pic!
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Whynot,
“Blame in on inferior EU information technology. It takes time for those little bytes to travel from USA to Europe, you know!”
LOLLL, maybe the American bytes are bigger than the European ones, too big and they get stuck in the transmission lines?
Jeanette,
This is a really beautiful picture. Thank you. This looks like heaven. I think if I had been born there I would not have wanted to go anywhere else.
It reminds me of Fontainebleau. I have been once to the Fontainebleau forest, it is only 60 km south of Paris, and it is so enchanting.
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OK, breaking my silence to answer the question. This is a photo of the back of the island on which my reservation is located. It’s either the back of that island or the island directly across from it which was owned by my family for many years and then sold off in lots so people could build what they call camps there. The camps range from simple to extravagant. Some even have hardwood floors carried across the frozen water in the winter.
They are just as nice as residences without the electricity, running water etc., but generators work very well.
If this is the back of the island where I was raised I know the exact spot and spent a lot of time walking there or canoeing there with friends.
I call the state of Maine “God’s Country” and felt that Valerie and/or Stiletto would enjoy seeing this photo.
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Forgot to tell you, you’re welcome, Valerie. I actually thought you’d love it.
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TLGK,
“This just in: George W. Bush is no longer president on the United States.”
And? Does it make him less a fascist asshole? You talk shit about Che Guevara all the time and yet he wasn’t even ever president of Cuba, yes? And that was a long time ago, so what’s wrong in talking about fucking Bush?
Just in: Che Guevara is not only no longer president of Cuba, he was never president of Cuba at all, and yet TLGK thinks it’s very interesting to talk about him.
Jeanette,
This photo… this is where you live/lived? It reminds of memories about home, the places that were not destroyed by bombs, lol. Do you have wolves in there? And bears?
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We have bears and they are not afraid to approach people. One time a few years ago a guy was standing outside in the dark petting his dog. The dog turned out to be a bear cub. Black bear. Neither the man nor the bear were frightened.
Because it’s on an island I guess it’s easy for the bears to swim from one island to another. This is where I grew up. I’ve never heard of wolves but then again a lot of people seem to want dogs that are half-wolf so there must be a wolf population there.
People are driving these animals from their natural habitat by building the cabins on the other islands and they come to the inhabited one. I haven’t heard any horror stories though.
I hope you like it, Stiletto, because I asked WhyNot to post it for you and Valerie especially.
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Jeanette,
“I hope you like it, Stiletto, because I asked WhyNot to post it for you and Valerie especially.”
Yes I like it very much, it is so beautiful, thank you.
“One time a few years ago a guy was standing outside in the dark petting his dog. The dog turned out to be a bear cub. Black bear. Neither the man nor the bear were frightened.”
Lol, the man must have been not very intelligent because even in the dark a bear does not feel anything like a dog, especially one that you know every day. If I saw a shade in the dark and thought it was Rex and I carressed him, I would know in a second if that was something else than him instead. I know because I have touched the fur of a dead bear. It is impossible to make the mistake with the fur of a dog unless you are completly drunk.
And if you are completely drunk then you won’t know anything anyway because you will be dead if the bear is still alive.
But maybe a bear cub, I don’t know. If you pat a bear cub in Chechnya, then you must run very fast before his mother kills you unless you have a machine gun.
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Stiletto,
I don’t talk shit about Che Guevara. I merely tell the truth about Che Guevara. There are some on this site who think that he was a cross between Mohandas Gandhi and Gautama Buddha. I am not among them. I do not initiate attacks on Che Guevara. But when someone goes all money over him, I will say, “Are you kidding?”
As for George W. Bush, whatever he is, he is in the past tense. His political career is over. He is a non factor and pretty much a non entity. Certainly the evil (much) and the good (less) will live after him. But to excoriate in the same breath as Putin and Sarkosy who are currently in power is just living in the past.
Meanwhile, you are spot on about bear cubs. Where there is a cub, can the sow be far away? Just satnd back, and try to move away slowly.
TLGK
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Stiletto,
From what I recall my mother telling me at the time was that the man was out in the open area but it was very dark. He was standing there doing I don’t know what. He felt a nudge and reached down absent-mindedly and stroked what he thought was a dog. When he looked down he saw it was a bear.
He may have had a few drinks in him as drugs and alcohol are problems with Native American people. Not all, but a lot are abusers of alcohol and/or drugs. So who knows if he was drunk or sober.
I’m telling the story third hand because it got to my mother and she told me about it. How many people it went through before she heard it is anyone’s guess but she had pretty good connections with everyone and usually heard things first.
I’ve also felt bear fur and it is coarser than a dog’s fur, so either he wasn’t paying attention to what was beside him because he was enjoying the stars or whatever or he was half in the bag, meaning he was half drunk.
But I’m so happy you and Valerie like the photo of my home area where I grew up. I hope it’s good that it reminds you of your home, but I’ll feel bad if it brings back sad memories.
Bye for now.
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TLGK,
“I don’t talk shit about Che Guevara. / I merely tell the truth about Che Guevara.”
Yes, you do / no, you don’t.
Funny how you can praise Menson Mendela (rightly so, I might add) who wrote/said one of the highest praises in honor of Che Guevara ever. How do you explain this most flagrant contradiction?
Should people believe you or should they believe Nelson Mendela?
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WhyNot,
Nelson Mandela is indeed a mosT admirable man. But like everyone, he isn’t right 100% of the time. Che, in the years since his death, evolved into something he was not in life. Che the icon is wonderful. Che the man was a fascist mass murdering ideologue.
Last night I saw a trailer for a soon to be released film called “Invictus” about Nelson Mandela and the South African national rugby team. It features Morgan Freeman and Matt Damon.
TLGK
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TLGK,
“But like everyone, he isn’t right 100% of the time. Che, in the years since his death, evolved into something he was not in life. Che the icon is wonderful. Che the man was a fascist mass murdering ideologue.”
So… “unlike everyone“, you’re 100% right and Nelson Mandela 100% wrong about Che? Lol, say no more. Sigh.
Anyway, moving right along…
Jeanette,
Forgive me for talking to you and calling you by your name (name-which-must-not-be-mentioned, according to TLGK), but I wanted to say thanks for that amazing collection of photos (in that PowerPoint slideshow). Here is another for everyone’s enjoyment:
Although this one is out of the same slideshow, and is located on Jeanette’s home island, it caught my attention because about 10 km from where I live now there is an ostrich farm, right by the side of a main road.
Thank goodness, they have high fences, and while you can enjoy sight-seeing the birds while driving by, you don’t have to worry about them walking about on the road, lol.
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Correction: It is not located on my home island.
We got pretty close to an ostrich in Texas a few years ago.We had gone to visit our son, his wife and our grandchildren. On our way back from seeing the Alamo in San Antonio we saw a sign that there was a wildlife preserve close by so we went so the kids could enjoy it. (Us too)
We bought feed for the animals and started driving through the area. One of the first things we came to were the ostriches. One came running over to the passenger side of the car (right side) and up to the window where our son was sitting. He was holding the bag of food.
The ostrich tried to attack him and my husband had to find the remote on his side of the car (it was a rental and we weren’t familiar with it) to roll up the passenger window before the ostrich got there. He pecked at the window while it was going up and after it was closed.
I took a picture from the back seat and the bird’s eyes looked wild and red in the photo. I think it’s stored on my old computer as I can’t find it now. That was scary.
Now the zebras, on the other hand were cute. They would stop every car to get feed and then move on to the next car. A mother and her colt weren’t getting any food from the car in front of us so they came down to us. Our son fed them, they stuck their heads in the car window and then the mother snatched the bag off our son’s lap. dumped it into her mouth and swallowed the bag. She and her baby headed down to the car behind us.
I need to search for those photos but I wouldn’t publish any that show the faces of my family. That’s not cool. lol
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Ah. 10 or 15 years ago, a lot of pwopel thought they were going to get rich raising ostriches for meat. I sem to recall that in some parts of Africa, they take the place of guard dogs to keep predators away from herds.
Look WhyNot. Nelson Mandela was and is right about a lot of things. But if he thought Che was praiseworthy, then I think he wrong about Che. I am not right about everything, but I think I am correct about old Che. Once again, you have taken a position that amounts to: “This is the way that I feel so don’t confuse me w/ the facts.”
Nelson Mandela, togther w/ other, freed an entire nation from Apartheid and then did his best to reconcile the different races of his nation. That is the subject of the film “Invictus” which if your Latin is rusty, means “unconquered.”
But who did Che free? He helped deliver Cuba to Castro. Like Pete and Roger pointed out so long ago, “Meet the new boss. Same as the old boss.” In the process:
From Wikipedia:
As the only other ranked Comandante besides Fidel Castro, Guevara was an extremely harsh disciplinarian who unhesitatingly shot defectors. Deserters were punished as traitors, and Guevara was known to send execution squads to hunt down those seeking to go AWOL.[56] As a result, Guevara became feared for his brutality and ruthlessness.[57] During the guerrilla campaign, Guevara was also responsible for the often summary execution of a number of men accused of being informers, deserters or spies.[58]
…….
Castro named Guevara commander of the La Cabaña Fortress prison, for a five-month tenure (January 2 through June 12, 1959).[77] Guevara was charged with purging the Batista army and consolidating victory by exacting “revolutionary justice” against those considered to be traitors, chivatos (informants) or war criminals.[78] Serving in the post as commander of La Cabaña, Guevara reviewed the appeals of those convicted during the revolutionary tribunal process.[9] On some occasions the penalty delivered by the tribunal was death by firing squad.[79] ….. the newly empowered government carried out executions “without respect for due process.”[83] Although the exact numbers differ, it is estimated that several hundred people were executed during this time.[84]
Conflicting views exist of Guevara’s delight towards the executions at La Cabaña. Some exiled opposition biographers report that he relished the rituals of the firing squad, and organized them with gusto.[83] What is acknowledged by all sides is that Guevara had become a “hardened” man, who had no qualms about the death penalty or summary and collective trials. If the only way to “defend the revolution was to execute its enemies, he would not be swayed by humanitarian or political arguments.”[83] This is further confirmed by a February 5, 1959, letter to Luis Paredes López in Buenos Aires where Guevara states unequivocally “The executions by firing squads are not only a necessity for the people of Cuba, but also an imposition of the people.”[85]
Yessiree Bob. He was right up there w/ Nelson Mandela and the Dalai Lama when it came to being a humanitarian. And now, for the past 50 years, the Cubanos have been living in Castro’s socialist paradise. On the one hand they have free medical care. On the other hand, many do not have enough to eat.
Here is one for you. As much as I disagreed w/ the invasion of Iraq; as much as I deplore the the civilian deaths that resulted from both the invasion and the sectarian violence that has followed; as much as I descry the millions of internally and externally displaced Iraqis, I can credibly argue that George W. Bush has freed more people than Che Guevara ever did.
But if you wish to worship Che the icon, be my guest. Just remember, the golden calf did not turn out all that well for the Israelites.
TLGK
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TLGK,
“the newly empowered government carried out executions “without respect for due process.”[83] Although the exact numbers differ, it is estimated that several hundred people were executed during this time”
I suppose this is much worse than US’s atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, right? At least those hundreds of Japanese civilians, oops, sorry, hundreds of thousands of Japanese civilians, had “due process” right? “Due process” the good ole’ American Way, right?
Speaking of several hundred ppl executed during war time… this makes an interesting comparison with USA’s record of several thousand ppl executed during peace time. Yeah, the good ole’ American death row - nothing like it for guaranteed justice.
“And now, for the past 50 years, the Cubanos have been living in Castro’s socialist paradise. On the one hand they have free medical care. On the other hand, many do not have enough to eat.”
And now for the last few hundred years Americans have lived in capitalist paradise. On the one hand, millions don’t have health care; on the other hand, millions can’t eat to satisfy their hunger and live in cardboard boxes. Yahoo!!! Dog bless America!!!
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WhyNot,
“it caught my attention because about 10 km from where I live now there is an ostrich farm, right by the side of a main road. ”
You have ostriches where you live??? LOLLL, I am trying to imagine the traffic jams in Paris if there were ostriches running around in the streets, LOL!
Jeanette,
“The ostrich tried to attack him and my husband had to find the remote on his side of the car (it was a rental and we weren’t familiar with it) to roll up the passenger window before the ostrich got there. He pecked at the window while it was going up and after it was closed.”
LOLLL, I’ve never seen an ostrich in real life, except from a distance in a zoo, but I can imagine it must be scary to see one so close.
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WhyNot,
I am not going to argue w/ you about what occurred during WW II. You know why? It was a war. You seem completely unable to grasp that. It is merely another symptom of your inablility to think critically.
Here is another example. I provide evidence that your poster boy Che Guevara was a murderous ideologue who enabled Fidel Castro to become one of the world’s longest tenured despots. How do you respond? By criticizing the U.S. The U.S. is not the issue Of the discussion. Che Guevara is.
I am still waiting for the roster of people he freed. I am still waiting for a cogent argument of how Che made the world a better place.
Maybe you should just concede the point and admit you are wrong. If not, mount some defense of him. Attacking what the U.S. did in a war against Japan doesn’t cut it.
Regards.
The Loop Garoo Kid
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TLGK,
“I am still waiting for the roster of people he freed. I am still waiting for a cogent argument of how Che made the world a better place.”
Why don’t you ask Nelson Mendela? He seems to think so on both accounts.
Valérie,
“I am trying to imagine the traffic jams in Paris if there were ostriches running around in the streets, LOL!”
Yeah, that’d be some sight, for sure, lol.
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WhyNot,
I’m not asking Nelson Mandela. I’m asking you. Either defend Che w/ some evidence that he was the liberating hero who you proclaim him to be or admit you are wrong about him.
TLGK
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TLGK,
“Either defend Che w/ some evidence that he was the liberating hero who you proclaim him to be or admit you are wrong about him.”
Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Che_guevara
You’ll notice nobody has disputed the veracity of the facts quoted in that very long article.
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Answer the question WhyNot. Who is better off for having been freed by Che Guevara? What I notice is how you have failed to answer this very simple question.
Of course Estragon and Vladimir are still waiting for Godot
The Loop Garoo Kid
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TLGK,
“Answer the question WhyNot. Who is better off for having been freed by Che Guevara
Try Cuba for starters.
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2 things WhyNot.
1. “Try Cuba for starters.” You’re not serious are you? This from Wikipedia:
“The Cuban government has been accused of numerous human rights abuses including torture, arbitrary imprisonment, unfair trials, and extrajudicial executions (a.k.a. “El Paredón”). The Human Rights Watch alleges that the government “represses nearly all forms of political dissent” and that “Cubans are systematically denied basic rights to free expression, association, assembly, privacy, movement, and due process of law”.
Cuba was the second biggest prison in the world for journalists in 2008, second only to the People’s Republic of China, according to the Committee to Protect Journalists (CPJ), an international NGO. As a result of computer ownership bans, computer ownership rates are among the world’s lowest. Right to use Internet is granted only to selected people and these selected people are monitored. Connecting to the Internet illegally can lead to a five-year prison sentence.
Cuban dissidents face arrests and imprisonment. In the 1990s Human Rights reported that Cuba’s extensive prison system, one of the largest in Latin America, consists of some forty maximum security prisons, thirty minimum security prisons, and over 200 work camps. According to Human Rights Watch, political prisoners, along with the rest of Cuba’s prison population, are confined to jails with substandard and unhealthy conditions. Other dissident thinkers such as Yoani Sánchez are under tight surveillance.
Citizens cannot leave or return to Cuba without first obtaining official permission, which is often denied.”
Okay. Let’s see. The Cubans do not have freedom of speech; freedom of assembly; freedom of association; freedom to dissent; or freedom of movement. Here’s the acid test. If you lived in the socialist paradise that is Cuba, you would not be able to publish this blog.
Care to rethink your statement?
2. Any other countries that Che turned into paradise on earth besides Cuba?
Is it so terrible to admit that you, together w/ many others, including Nelson Mandela, are simply wrong about Che? That the legend and the reality are diametrically opposed? That about whatever freedom he may have written, what he wrought was tyranny?
Albert Einstein once said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. Einstein believed that if you ignore empirical evidence and fail to change your behavior, you are simply not rational.
I submit that your position regarding Che Guevara is at best irrational and at worst insane. Ignore your belief in his sainthood and examine the reality of his deeds.
Regards,
The Loop Garoo Kid
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TLGK,
“Is it so terrible to admit that you, together w/ many others, including Nelson Mandela, are simply wrong about Che?”
You seem to have a problem with history. Che died in 1967, i.e. over 40 years ago, assassinated by the CIA. Are you suggesting he’s responsible for what Cuba is like today? Would it not be more intelligent to state that Che indeed freed Cuba from US backed fascist dictator Batista, under whose regime even today’s Cuba looks like a holiday camp in comparison?
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Hello girls and boys,
Ain’t been around for a while, so I thought I’d drop by and leave a poop or two. My paddle’s eager to stir.
Now… I’m reading lotsa things saying “Che” this and “Che” that and fuck knows what. I once heard about a bad African blowfly called “cheche fly” or something like it. Big motherfucker. I suspect it means Chechenyan fly - the worst kind. Supposed to make you go blind even if you abstain from vigorously masturbating in Barb’s church at sermon time. Am I getting warm?
And where is my darling ruskie bitch from hell Stiletto in this most exciting debate?
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ShitStirrer,
“And where is my darling ruskie bitch from hell Stiletto in this most exciting debate?”
I’m here. I’m reading all this bullshit from TLGK and I wonder if he is trying to be funny or blind or retarded or all of them at the same time. Maybe the cheche fly bit him. So yesterday Nelson Mendela was right in everything and Valérie must get a poster of him to replace her Che Guevara one, but today he is wrong?
“I once heard about a bad African blowfly called “cheche fly” or something like it. Big motherfucker. I suspect it means Chechenyan fly … Supposed to make you go blind even if you abstain from vigorously masturbating in Barb’s church at sermon time.”
Lol. I don’t remember them. I masturbate often and I can see very well still.
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Stiletto,
“So yesterday Nelson Mandela was right in everything and Valérie must get a poster of him to replace her Che Guevara one, but today he is wrong?”
What I said was that Nelson Mandela was an admirable person, having freed his nation from a political system that denied rights to people of color. That is not the same thing as he is right about everything. No one is right about everything and I think that Mandela was dead wrong about Che.
WhyNot,
Can’t you get anything right? Che was killed by Bolivian special forces although those forces were trained and supported by the CIA. The order for Che’s execution came from Bolivian president Rene Barrientos. The CIA would have preferred to keep him alive for intelligence purposes.
“You seem to have a problem with history. Che died in 1967, i.e. over 40 years ago, assassinated by the CIA. Are you suggesting he’s responsible for what Cuba is like today? Would it not be more intelligent to state that Che indeed freed Cuba from US backed fascist dictator Batista, under whose regime even today’s Cuba looks like a holiday camp in comparison?”
Yes, it was > 42 years ago. Men die, but their images of T-shirts and posters live on.
This from Wikipedia:
“Cuba had Latin America’s highest per capita consumption rates of meat, vegetables, cereals, automobiles, telephones and radios.[38] In 1958, Cuba was a relatively well-advanced country, certainly by Latin American standards, and in some cases by world standards.[39] Cuban’s workers enjoyed some of the highest wages in the world. Cuba attracted more immigrants, primarily from Europe, as a percentage of population than the US. The United Nations noted Cuba for its large middle class. On the other hand, Cuba was affected by perhaps the largest labor union privileges in Latin America, including bans on dismissals and mechanization. They were obtained in large measure “at the cost of the unemployed and the peasants”, leading to disparities.[40] Between 1933 and 1958, Cuba extended economic regulations enormously, causing economic problems.[36][41] Unemployment became relatively large; graduates entering the workforce could not find jobs.[36] The middle class, which compared Cuba to the United States, became increasingly dissatisfied with the unemployment, while labor unions supported Batista until the very end.[34][36]”
Am I suggesting that Che was responsible for making Cuba into what it is today? Che helped install Fidel Castro and to implement his and Che’s version of “the Revolution.” So the answer to that question is yes. Of course Che bears responsibility. Total responsibility? Of course not.
So if Castro wasn’t running the country and some successor of Batista was, I would bet the Cubanos would have free access to the internet. As for Batista’s Cuba being worse than Castro’s, better cite some evidence to support that proposition. Or are we ignoring evidence based reality in favor of fantasy again.
TLGK
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Stiletto,
“I don’t remember them. I masturbate often and I can see very well still.”
Good on you, that’s the spirit! If you need help, don’t be shy - call me!
Ok, this thread’s supposed to be about photos and it seems to be overtaken by mindless bullshit rants from WhyNot and TLGK. Honest, those 2 seem to think they own the fucking joint!
I need to find a kick-ass picture… be right back!
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ShitStirrer,
“If you need help, don’t be shy - call me!”
LOLLL, does it mean your GPS is working again? Watch out, Stiletto!
“this thread’s supposed to be about photos and it seems to be overtaken by mindless bullshit rants from WhyNot and TLGK. Honest, those 2 seem to think they own the fucking joint!”
LOL, I’m glad I don’t own it, too much responsability.
“I need to find a kick-ass picture… be right back!”
It’s nearly 12 hours ago that you wrote this and I still don’t see a picture! Did you get lost with your GPS and you can’t find your computer?
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Stiletto,
“So yesterday Nelson Mendela was right in everything and Valérie must get a poster of him to replace her Che Guevara one, but today he is wrong?”
Actually the answer is easy: Valérie, forget Mendela and Che, and put up a huge poster of TLGK instead. Here is one of him I caught just recently - during one of his more eloquent diatribes at a court case:
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As usual WhyNot got it wrong. The caption should read: “WhyNot discovers all the people liberated by Che Guevara.”
Regards,
TLGK
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TLGK,
“WhyNot discovers all the people liberated by Che Guevara”
Lol, that was pretty funny. How about a litte game by which everyone devises a caption of their imagination? Here is my input:
“TLGK taking a deep breath before making his final speech”
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WhyNot,
“How about a litte game by which everyone devises a caption of their imagination?”
That could be interesting, but right now I don’t give a fuck what TLGK thinks. I am more interested in more photos of Jeanette’s home land.
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Whynot,
Lol, that was pretty funny. How about a litte game by which everyone devises a caption of their imagination? Here is my input:
Hello, I am a Scientologist.
or
I will be right with you, I am chatting with my ex wife.
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Mr P,
“Hello, I am a Scientologist”
LOLLL, maybe this is why the church of scientology got in big trouble in France not long ago. How about:
“Français, françaises, this is Sarkozy speaking to the nation; can anyone hear me?”
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Valérie,
“Français, françaises, this is Sarkozy speaking to the nation; can anyone hear me?”
Lol, you nearly got it, sweetie pie. Hint: try going transatlatic, zoom into Colorado…
Stiletto,
“but right now I don’t give a fuck what TLGK thinks. I am more interested in more photos of Jeanette’s home land.”
Ha! Well, I extracted quite a few photos out of the PowerPoint Slide Show she emailed me, but I think most of the shots are from somewhere else than her home island. Jeanette?
In the meantime, here is a pic of T-Rex chewing someone’s ass. As you can see, the ass in question is neatly precut to sizable chunks, easily chewable for a lil monster like T-Rex.
This is a game show: the aim is to guess who’s ass he’s chewing; bets are on, and the winner will share T-Rex’s meal (it’s only a few years old, I swear, and I preserved it in the freezer)! Cheating by looking at the picture’s filename is strictly prohibited and will result in your own ass being chewed!
T-RexChewingTLGKass.jpg -
TLGK is my food guy. I would never let a member of the genus Felis, particularly one as as puny as T-Rex , chew his ass. See we have a name for animals like T-Rex where we live. We call them “lunch.”
Here’s noses is your crotches.
Griffon the Ghost Dog of the North
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Griffon the ghost-testicles doggie,
“TLGK is my food guy.”
He’s mine too, in par with mice and rats. His ass is right here in my plate in fact, and I can tell you it’s some fucking smelly ass I’m chewing right now. Looks like it’s tough, which is no wonder - a frozen lawyer’s ass is as tough as his brain is thick. But no wocking furries, I’ll do my duty and I’ll eat it to the last morsel - don’t want the fucker to spawn and multiply.
You’d better start fending for yourself, doggie-woggie, cuz if you count on lawyer scumbags to feed ya, you’re in for a nasty surprise. Before you know it, he’ll sell your private parts to the butcher and feed them back to ya, with sauce à la Lousiana or some Microdot unspeakable French recipe with courgettes, crème Chantilly and fuck-knows-what else.
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Stiletto,
I don’t use photoshop and am too lazy right now to install the GIMP onto my e-Mac, later xx,
Rory
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T-Rex,
“Before you know it, he’ll sell your private parts to the butcher and feed them back to ya, with sauce à la Lousiana or some Microdot unspeakable French recipe with courgettes, crème Chantilly and fuck-knows-what else.
LOLLL, what’s “sauce à la Louisiana”?
Rory,
“I don’t use photoshop and am too lazy right now to install the GIMP onto my e-Mac”
What’s GIMP? And I thought that Adobe had their products available for MACs anyway.
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See what happens when you let cats talk? The whole room goes to sleep. I mean of all the scrumptious body parts, the freaking cat goes for the fatty ass. Not Food Guy’s fatty ass because I’m looking at Food Guy’s ass. Is this a French thing like giving Jerry Lewis the Legion D’ Honneur? Or is it just a cat thing? You know their cranial cavities are pretty teeny.
Anyway T-Rex we should do lunch. Just make sure you wash before hand.
Griffon the Ghost Dog of the North
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Griffon,
“You know their cranial cavities are pretty teeny.”
Well, better a small cranial cavity full of neurones than a big one full of shit. You must know the Aussie proverb, right?:
Q: what’s the difference between a smellie doggie and a prawn (= shrimp - they call them prawns downunder)?
A: a prawn’s body is full of meat and his head’s full of shit, whereas a smelly doggie is full of shit from head to tail.
Now… about your lunch idea… sounds good to me. What do you suggest for appetizers? I thought perhaps a fricassée of TLGK nuts doused in crème Chantilly and flambé with Cointreau, whatcha think?
“Just make sure you wash before hand.”
Wash? Bwhahahahah, this has to be the fucking joke of the century, doggie woggie. We cats wash all the time, you doggies don’t even know the meaning of the word. This reminds me I must bring a can of air purifier when we lunch together, lest I puke in my plate from the nauseous doggie odors emanating from your putrid self.
Tell me, when’s the last time you rolled around in a decaying corpse in ecstatic delight? Yesterday?
-
What’s bred in the bone comes out in the flesh I suppose. You can’t overcome the shortcomings of your species. I want you to wash to save me the trouble because you’re for lunch.
Griffon of Griffyndor
Ghost Dog of the North
Bane of Cats
Eater of Feline Souls
Roller in Dead Things
Crotch Sniffer
Slobberwocky
Cowboy dog in the Boat of Ra -
T-Rex,
“I thought perhaps a fricassée of TLGK nuts doused in crème Chantilly and flambé with Cointreau, whatcha think?”
LOLLLL, this sounds worse than a Microdot recipe!
Griffon,
“Crotch Sniffer”
LOL, I have noticed that dogs often do that, and also when 2 dogs meet they must sniff each other’s assholes. Why do dogs like the smell of shit so much?
-
Valérie,
“and also when 2 dogs meet they must sniff each other’s assholes. Why do dogs like the smell of shit so much?”
It’s built into their genes, my friend. Dogs inherently stink, are fouled-mannered, bark for no apparent reason, wag their stupid tails (whenever there is a hint of cerebral activity - located in their asshole) and break everything in their wake.
And…, above all, they LOVE the smell of shit.
Furthermore, they piss and shit anywhere they feel like it (of course, they don’t bother choosing a place where they can cover it up - that’s way beyond their mental capacity). Anywhere will do just fine. In fact the more in view, the better. Sidewalks are a favorite spots of theirs for shitting. Car tyres are very popular for pissing.
But their forte is “smell” - not as in “having an acute sense of smell” but as in “stinking so bad any Tom Dick and Harry can smell the fuckers a km away even wih a clothes peg firmly stuck on their nostrils“.
Lastly… you ask “why do they sniff each others’ assholes when they meet”. Well, the answer is simple: their asshole is their brain; they think through it, they talk through it, they breathe through it.
-
They call dogs: “A man’s best friend.” Please note that there is no sign for cat in the Chinese zodiac. What do people say about cats or what do they say about themselves?
* Always give generously. A small bird or rodent left on the bed tells them, I care.
* Climb your way to the top. That’s why the drapes are there.
* Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours.
* Find your place in the sun. Especially if it happens to be on that nice pile of warm, clean laundry.
* If you’re not receiving enough attention, try knocking over several expensive antique lamps.
* Life is hard, then you nap.
* Make your mark in the world. Or at least spray in each corner.
* Never sleep alone when you can sleep on someone’s face.
* Variety is the spice of life. One day ignore people, the next day annoy them.
* When eating out, think nothing of sending back your meal twenty or thirty times.
* When in doubt, cop an attitude.I myself am conflicted about cats. I never know whether to eat them or giving them flying lessons.
Griffon the Ghostdog
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Griffon,
“I myself am conflicted about cats. ”
I know how you feel - I feel much the same about dogs. I never know whether to stop breathing when one comes by cuz of the stench, or to jump on his ass, dig my front claws into his eyes, my rear claws into his ears, and ride him until he dumbly smashes his ugly mug into the nearest tree, at which stage I jump off onto the tree’s trunk above and piss in his general direction.
-
You lead a pretty active fantasy life for a cat. Maybe you’re used to lap dogs. Come visit anytime. You need only buy a one way ticket.
Griffon the Ghost Dog
-
Excuse me for interupting Griffon, but it’s time for T rex to fix my breakfast. I don’t think he wants me to use him as a punching bag again. He cried enough last time I had to wear waders. Perhaps you would join me? Make haste T Rex ya big pussy, and set another plate. When you are done with serving and finish the dishes, you can rub our feet and clean up our shit. Don’t make me rub your face in my shit. And put that french maid costume on again, we find it amusing.
-
Marvin Mouse,
“but it’s time for T rex to fix my breakfast.”
Too right! How about a pair of Griffon testicles gently rissolées in champagne and olive oil, with garlic and herbs, Sir? That is of course provided “Griffon testicles” are still available; should they not be, would a fricassée of Griffon rectum doused in Griffon’s microscopic brain sauce (stirred in Cointreau) do?
Please, any other suggestion, let me know; I really need to make sure you enjoy your meal, get so sumptiously fat and rotund that I won’t even need to get off my ass to knock you out silly - just a gentle thump of my paw will do the trick; I can dangle you from my claws, open my mouth in anticipated ecstasy and drop & then slurp you in all comfort.
-
Looks like this blog’s been taken over by a fucking zoo.
-
Yo! Marvin! Yessiree, still hanging front to back. As for my rectum, T-Rex is familiar with inasmuch as it was his birth canal.
Griffon the Ghost Dog
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ShitStirrer,
“Looks like this blog’s been taken over by a fucking zoo.”
LOLLLLL, yes I was thinking something like this also. We need a few zebras and a hippopotamus. But no crocodile please!
-
What do you mean no crocodiles. I ate Captain Hook and I can eat you too.
Cornelius Crocodile
-
Very nice site here. I will post something when I am done masterbating to these cave paintings.
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Yo Sven. How’s Beau?
Griffon the Ghost Dog
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Cornelius Crocodile,
“What do you mean no crocodiles. I ate Captain Hook and I can eat you too.”
LOL, who are you? This is the reason, you see, I don’t like the way crocodiles eat women. It is not sexy and does not give them pleasure at all. And if you ate Captain Cook, then you are a bi-sexual, and I am not sure I want a bisexual boyfriend, in fact I am sure I don’t. I think maybe I am old fashion.
But I like looking at real wild animals on TV or even better at the zoo. I mean “even better”, not really, the pictures are of course not as wonderful as you see on documentaries, but you see the animals right in front of you, and it is so much more striking than on a television screen. When I say “wild animals” I don’t mean Sarkozy, I mean real ones, LOL.
And about crocodiles, I once saw a documentary in Africa: this river where every year the wildbeasts cross this river, there are hundreds of thousands of them. The crocodiles know it and they wait for them. The wildbeasts know that some of them will die in the crocodiles jaws, but they can’t help themselves, it is part of the journey they have to make to make life continue.
It is very beautiful and also very sad. I try to think that even if the crocodiles were not there waiting for them, there would be many of them who would die anyway because the travel is very long and difficult, but it is necessary for them for the survival of their species.
Maybe the humans also have the same journey? Maybe it doesn’t matter if there are wars and hatred, there would be many who would die anyway just so that the species can continue?
-
Valerie,
Did you ever read “Peter Pan” by James M. Barrie?
Cornelius C
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Cornelius,
“Did you ever read “Peter Pan” by James M. Barrie?”
I’ve heard of it but haven’t read it. Is there a connection with crocodiles?
-
Valerie,
Captain James Hook is a fictional character and the antagonist of J. M. Barrie’s play Peter Pan, or the Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up and its various adaptations. The character is a villainous pirate captain of the Jolly Roger galleon, and lord of the pirate village/harbour in Neverland, where he is widely feared. Most importantly, he is the archenemy of Peter Pan. It is said that Hook was Blackbeard’s boatswain, and that he was the only man Long John Silver ever feared.
Hook wears a big iron hook in place of his hand, which was cut off by Peter Pan and eaten by a saltwater crocodile. The crocodile liked the taste so much that he follows Hook around constantly, hoping for more. Luckily for Hook, the crocodile also swallowed a clock, so Hook can tell from the ticking when he is near. Hook hates Peter obsessively and lives for the day he can make Peter and all his Lost Boys walk the plank.
In Barrie’s story, Hook captures Wendy Darling, the girl who loves Peter and whom Peter views as his surrogate mother, and challenges the boy to a final duel. When Hook is beaten, Peter Pan kicks him overboard to the open jaws of the waiting crocodile below.
“The waiting crocodile below.”
Moi. YT
C. Crocodile, Esq.
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Cornelius,
“When Hook is beaten, Peter Pan kicks him overboard to the open jaws of the waiting crocodile below.”
The whole story is really horrible and I’m glad I haven’t read it - I would have nightmares every night, LOL.
But speaking of pirates, I have seen 3 films about pirates which I really enjoyed: they are all called “Pirates of the Caribbean” (with an additional title to make the difference between them).
Have you seen them? I think they are movies from UK.
They remind me of old adventures stories like the 3 musketeers. The main hero is such an interesting guy: he’s so good-looking (of course!) but in a kind of feminine way a little bit, very smart, cheeky, plays tricks on his enemies. He is a bit like D’Artagnan in the 3 Musketeers.
-
Valerie,
The only redeeming aspects of the “Pirates of the Caribbean” series were: Johnny Depp–tres cool; Keira Knightly–luscious; and Orlando Bloom–handsome.
For pirate movies from the classic era, check out “Captain Blood” with Errol Flynn and “The Crimson Pirate” with Burt Lancaster.
As for Dumas, my favorite treatment was ” The Three Musketeers” (1973) and “The Four Musketeers” (1974).Michael York as D’Artagnon; Raquel Welch as Constance; Oliver Reed as Athos; Richard Chamberlain as Aramis; Christopher Lee as Rochefort; Charleton Heston as Richelieu; and Faye Dunaway as Milady de Winter.
If you can rent these, you will not be disappointed.
I am sorry you do wish to read ‘ Peter Pan.” I am crying crocodile tears.
C. Crocodile, Esq.
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Cornelius Croc,
“The only redeeming aspects of the “Pirates of the Caribbean” series were: Johnny Depp–tres cool; Keira Knightly–luscious; and Orlando Bloom–handsome.”
Damn, it’s a shame you didn’t like them, for I have to agree with Valérie and thought all 3 movies are a great mix of fun and adventure, not to mention clever parody and delightful irreverence.
The actors you mention don’t ring a bell, except Michael York and Richard Chamberlain - and of course Faye Dunaway. But then again, I’ve never been an “actor/actress” fan - although some have stuck to my mind because of their particularly brilliant performances - like Michael York and Lisa Minelli (SP?) in an excellent movie set at the prelude of WWII in Germany (can’t remember the name, something about “Cabaret” springs to my mind, but it’s probably not it).
Funnily enough, I’ve seen so many movies where totally unknown actors/actresses play such brilliant performances, that I’m more and more blasé with the “big name” club.
Back to Dumas: while the 3 Musketeers trilogy is his best known work, I’ve read all of his novels (many, more than once), and my all-time favorite by far is “the Count of Monte-Cristo”. This epic has got it all, and also is maybe more poignant than his previous works because it is more realistic and closer to home (meaning, to our time and way of thinking).
I wonder if any movie was made of it.
“If you can rent these, you will not be disappointed.”
Rent? Rent???? Why rent when you can steal? No need to resort to insults, this is a friendly discussion!!!
Later,
Alligator -
If there is any good to come from the muslim terrorist atrocity committed by Major Hasan at Fort Hood, it is the likelihood that enough Americans to make a difference will reconsider Islam and the muslim world with enough clarity to act against it in ways that matter.
I was thrilled to read that government agents seized several properties in the US controlled by Iran.
It is stunning that three American hikers can find themselves accused of spying as they explore some mountains in Iran, but Americans turn a blind eye to muslims in the US operating on behalf of Iran, who are generating funds for terrorists from rent collected on buildings they own.
Once again, muslims have perverted capitalism and democracy to further their aims of destroying Western ways.
Turning commercial jets into flying bombs, becoming a member of the US military to get inside and commit mass murder of the people who are sworn to protect the nation, and now renting property to Americans to raise cash for terrorists sponsored by Iran.
The world would benefit a lot from a barrage of cruise missiles fired into the center of government in Tehran.
Unfortuantely, Obama the semi-muslim, is too wimpy and too much on their side to act decisively. He is about to present his plan for surrender in the Afghanistan/Pakistan fight, which will receive widespread approval from all the world’s jihadists.
But maybe he has privately admitted the muslim threat is real and is an established part of Islam.
-
No slappz,
What you say is interesting, but I don’t understand most of it. Sorry, I’m just a Russian whore living in western Europe.
What does “no slappz” mean? That you don’t like to be slapped in the face, lol? If yes, then I understand because I feel exactly the same and I don’t take aggression passively and get very easily physical, and I have pretty good training.
“The world would benefit a lot from a barrage of cruise missiles fired into the center of government in Tehran.”
Maybe. I’m not sure. I think the Iranian government is fucked. But I also saw that many Iranian people want things to change. If you dropped a bomb on Teheran, you would mostly kill civilians. Do you think the world would benefit from that?
I have seen lots of missiles from Moscow falling around my head in Chechnya as a little girl, and it is not pretty to see buildings in rubbles and people in little pieces under them.
“Once again, muslims have perverted capitalism and democracy to further their aims of destroying Western ways.”
I don’t like religious people much in general, doesn’t matter if muslim or christian or whatever. But I think you are wrong saying that muslims are the cause of all the trouble. I don’t know much about past history, but modern one, yes a bit, and mostly I see that christians and muslims are just as fucked.
So, you think Obama is a religious muslim fanatic? Lol, you haven’t seen nothing yet.
-
WhyNot,
The Pirates of the Caribbean films were amusing but just so much fluff. When you make a movie based upon a ride at Disney World, it will only take you so far, even if you are Captain Jack Sparrow.
The Liza Minelli/ Michael York film was “Caberet.”
There have been ten films of “The Count of Monte Cristo,” the most recent in 2002.
C Crocodile, Esq.
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no_slappz,
How goes it in Brooklyn? I read this morning of the seizure of assets held by proxies for the Iranian government and I too applauded. Please advise of your thoughts regarding trying Khalid Sheikh Mohammed in Federal Court in NYC.
“The world would benefit a lot from a barrage of cruise missiles fired into the center of government in Tehran.
Unfortunately, Obama the semi-muslim, is too wimpy and too much on their side to act decisively. He is about to present his plan for surrender in the Afghanistan/Pakistan fight, which will receive widespread approval from all the world’s jihadists.”
Certainly the world would benefit if the current Iranian regime disappeared. I must agree w/ Stiletto on this account that cruise missiles fired on Tehran would probably do more harm than good.
no_slappz is of the opinion, w/ which I concur, that we are currently experiencing a period of militant Muslim extremism. Some argue, that to be Muslim is to be extreme, but I have yet to adopt that particular philosophy. In fact, financed by petro dollars, there is a Muslim movement to undermine western secular institutions and supplant them w/ religious Muslim ones, Sharia Law in particular. Some of this insidious sedition is accomplished through the perversion of capitalism and democracy as no_slappz notes. Capitalism b/c in free markets, if one has money, one can buy or sell and it is possible that fronts for Islamic militants may acquire property like that just seized in the U.S. Democracy b/c if you foster a free society, you cannot merely rid your country of pernicious individuals or groups w/o due process of law.
I confess I am not as militant as no_slappz and do not share his opinion either that Barrack Obama is semi Muslim or wimpy. Obama was correct when he identified the real site of the war against Terrorism as being in Afghanistan and Pakistan. I still find myself amazed that the U.S. became involved in Iraq.
Stiletto, I share your dislike of hyper religious people but understand that there is a difference between someone like Barb and someone like Mohamed Fadly. Barb is more or less harmless. Mohamed Fadly is a serpent in Eden. If you look at world events for the past 20 years, you will agree w/ no_slappz that much of the ongoing problems are attributable to Muslim extremism. Not all. The prosecution of Muslims in the Balkans in the 1990’s is an exception; as are many of the conflicts in sub Saharan Africa, although not the Sudan.
Except for the example of the Balkans and perhaps the conflicts in certain parts of the Soviet Union, Christians are never the aggressors.
Regards,
The Loop Garoo Kid
-
No-slappz,
“Once again, muslims have perverted capitalism and democracy to further their aims of destroying Western ways.”
Maybe in America but not here in France or even Europe. More than one fifth of the population is Arab/Muslim (in France), and it makes no difference what the extremists think, the system and the people do not care about the religious crazies. You do something crazy like blowing up a train or metro, then you meet the law, and it doesn’t matter if you are atheist, christian or muslim, it is the same court case.
But it’s more than the “system” which doesn’t care, it’s the population of the country; France is a secular country since 1905, religion has no place in politics and social things, religion is something you do in private if you feel like it, and everybody likes it this way.
I think it is nearly the same in every other European country. Maybe in Europe we have become so sick and tired of religious interference for so many centuries that we just laugh about it because it goes nowhere in practice if some idiot wants to start a religious crusade, everybody will laugh because it will be so ridiculous.
Here muslims do not disturb the peace any more than christians. You never hear about “MUSLIM” problems, only about human ones, whichever the religion, if they have one.
Maybe America is still a religious country and it feels it has to explain or side or defend religious positions even if they are crazy?
Here nobody cares.
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Valérie,
“Maybe America is still a religious country and it feels it has to explain or side or defend religious positions even if they are crazy? ”
“Maybe in Europe we have become so sick and tired of religious interference for so many centuries that we just laugh about it because it goes nowhere in practice if some idiot wants to start a religious crusade, everybody will laugh because it will be so ridiculous.”
You got that right, baby. America is like Europe some 7 centuries ago. Religion, religion and more fucking religion crusades - mixed with politically ideological ones. And everyone loves it, no kidding! Let’s go bash the shit outta some heathens and teach them the way of Jesus Fucking Christ good and proper, Yeah!
But, hey, give us a chance, we’re still learning! Maybe, just maybe… one day we’ll become a secular country too!
“Here nobody cares.”
Prolly cuz you’ve reached some kind of wisdom level after so many centuries of demented religious wars. Here we’re only discovering the fun of massacring and getting massacred in return. We think we have bigger dicks and that makes us right - must be somewhere in the bible, I’m sure.
Hey, I’m working on a brand new GPS thingie… no kidding. This one looks most promising - I closed my eyes, followed the beep-beep signal, and Bob’s Kristina’s uncle, before I knew it I was shitting in the toilet bowl!
-
ShitStirrer,
“one looks most promising - I closed my eyes, followed the beep-beep signal, and Bob’s Kristina’s uncle, before I knew it I was shitting in the toilet bowl!”
Thank you for remembering me and my uncle, even if in not so glorious circumstances; I am glad you made it to the toilet bowl in time.
Cornelius Crocodile,
Mr Politeness, I am glad to see you are still a fun person. You, and WhyNot make a fine pair of scoundrels à la Pirates of the Carribeans :-).
-
Holy Cow of toledo!I wander back here and some guy from brooklyn is trying to paint the Fort Hood tragedy as if it was aa Al Qaeda plot and a reason to destroy all humans of an Islamic bent and TLGK is personally going to ride his customized cruise missle to downtown Tehran…. and he is venting his birther sentiments…I thought you were a little more intelligent and mature than that…too fuckin bad….too old to change…except like a cheese that is over it’s expiration date….
Let me design the cruise missle for you TLGK! I can do a real nice job with chrome headers, big fuckin Cadillac fins and fenders from hell…then you can put on your rat fink costume and scream BANZAI in style! -
Who the fuck is this microdork? This is what is gonna destroy America,! Jerks like him bending over and letting the Camel Humpers fuck his fat ass!
We ave to have a national identity test and a lie detector loyalty oath administered to every person who wants the privelege of being called American!
The bigest mistake was to elect a black negro foreigner as the president! These negroer and I use the most polite term I can, have so much genetically inbred hate for America…hey, it’snot my fault their grand daddy was picking cotton or their grand ma got screwed by a white man…hell a little white blood is something topraise the Lord for!
Listen, Microdork or what ever you think your name is…show some respect to real Aericans like TLGK or the Slapper guy…you should kiss their asses because it’s patriots like them who are doing sometiing to keep your ass safe instead of being blown up by a 747 full of terrorists from Iran with your name on it!
Now go back to what ever rock you are hiding under, chicken shit boy! -
microdot,
Whose comment were you reading? Not mine. So I’m a Birther now? What a curious metamorphosis. First I vote for the guy; then I decry conspiracy freaks; now I’m a birther. Anyway, I’ll wait for your astral body or critical abilities to catch up w/ you. Hope you enjoyed your nuptials.
EP. Call home! One of Obama’s grand daddies was white. I think the other was herding livestock in Kenya.
Of course if you and microdot want to demonstrate why the world is a better place b/c of the present Iranian regime, I’m all ears.
Regards,
The Loop Garoo Kid
-
HeyHey what’s up with this site? The wind is whistlin through the roof and it seems like nobody’s home! I’m back here in the country and I am so happy to be back.
How is everyone?
Y’all lining up for your swine flu shots? Last i heard, 24 people had gotten them, including adame Bachelot who got hers twice…
We even heard about Sarko’s imaginary trip to ttear down the Berlin Wall ! Everyone got a big laugh out of that!
The wedding was a sucess…too bad you weren’t at the party….the dinosaurs ate all the guests and then we rode them down Broadway and climbed up the Empire State Building.Sorry TLGK, I guess you didn’t actually say that Obama wasn’t born in America, you just took a cheap shot and said he was half arab or something.. I don’t have tiime or the patience to compassionately react to subtle crap like that and you are the subtle little devil…..
See Ya
-
m,
I understand that your neurons might be slightly impaired at this juncture. Alcohol concussion.
Check out the quotation marks. I cited no_slappz. I know, I know. “There is too much confusion; I can’t no relief.”You need to figure out the players here, mon vieux. Need a scorecard?
TLGK
-
TLGK, I think I do have to apologize to you, I went up and reread your comments and you did not refer to Obama as half Muslim…you used the phrase to deny the statement that the slappa guy used. I I read the the thread fast when I opened up the page when I got back and I got Pissed off royal!
After 2 weeks in America and experiencing the lame ass news reportage that is on the so called mainstream channels, I was ready for anything.
Then, out of sheer perverse curiosity, I watched FOX to experience the full volumnious garbiosity of its utter carpulous bullshit…If i am suffereing from any kind of overdose…it is sheer shpock from the toxic stream of mind numbibng chemical and bullshit rays that eminatre from the orifices of Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh and the grand master of of foul odors, Glenn, I wanna fuck sarah Palin, Beck….
Forgive Me as i have to finish sanforizing my brain… -
m,
No worries. Can you get The daily Show in France or by computer? I always love it when John Stewart shows a series of fast clips of Bill, and Sean and Glenn stepping on their tongues; being ridiculous; or worshiping at the alter of La Palin.
The only time I see Fox News is when I am in a particular office building in downtown Colorado Springs and where there is a video feed on the elevator instead of Musak. B/c I never go higher than the 7th floor, my exposure is limited. Once in a blue moon, like every 6 months, I will watch 5 minutes of The O’Reilly Factor will either imbues me w/ a deep sense of irony; reduces me to hopeless laughter; or just annoys me as Papa Bear attempts to press the hot buttons of the geriatric set in his effort to sell pick up trucks and toilet paper.
TLGK
-
We get to see The Daily Show International Edition on week ends. It is a compilation of the week. Now I realy wish I could get the Colbert Report. It is funny, a lot of my American friends say, Thank God for the Daily Show, it’s the only real news we have!”
Meanwhile Fox is showing doctored videos of Sarah Palin book signings and got called out last week for using fake footage of Michelle Bachmans Teabag rally in front of the White House………
They decieve and idiots believe…
I watched FOX, as I said to experience the BURN! We stayed with our friends in New York and the daughter was addicted to the reality show, The Biggest Loser….we woud come home and the whole family would be watching together…
It was a bizarre experience. It was one of the most calculated, manipulative media freakshows I have ever seen. You couldn’t help but get caught up in the stories of the contestants and thie personalities, but the voyeuristic trip of watching morbidly obese people competye to lose weight was twilight zone….
I really felt that most of the program was scripted, rather than honest reality… -
Kristina,
I cannot take credit for Cornelius Crocodile.
And this place reminds me of
And in the death
As the last few corpses lay rotting on the slimy thoroughfare
The shutters lifted in acient Temperance Building
High on Poacher’s Hill
And red mutant eyes gaze down on Hunger City
No more big wheelsFleas the size of rats sucked on rats the size of cats
And ten thousand peoploids split into small tribes
Coveting the highest of the sterile skyscrapers
Like packs of dogs assaulting the glass fronts of Love-Me Avenue
Ripping and rewrapping mink and shiny silver fox, now legwarmers
Family badge of sapphire and cracked emerald
in the day of the dog
the year of the diamond dog
this aint rock and roll its genocide -
Has anyone heard from/spoken to WhyNot in the past 10 days? I saw him on Skype regularly and we chatted, but nothing since last week.
He was having difficulty getting his water turned on at the new apartment and France Telecom couldn’t seem to get his order for ADSL completed.
He said he was sick one of the last times I talked to him and I’m concerned about him. Maybe Odile told him to vacate her garage immediately and he moved into his apartment without water and/or ADSL, but if anyone knows please make a post.
Thanks.
-
Jeanette- I thought I might find you over here! Good thing, too, as barb is in trouble. I am surprised that oyu are here again, though because when I last drifted here several weeks ago, you stated that it was your LAST TIME ever posing on PP. And now, presto, here you are, again. How many times have you ‘quit’ here? Just wondering.
But about your pal, barb- needs you badly! She needs three delusional fundamentalist christians to post a comment on her blog in the next 24 hours or else a fairly new commenter has threatened to leave her blog. Of course, when that happens, it will leave you and Robbie boy.
She is pleading- an ALL CALL FOR FUNDIES to post a comment or she loses the only person who still lives in the real world. Get there ASAP!
…just trying to help out
-
Muchachos, Muchachas,
I just flew in from Guam. Where’s the party? I could use a pina colada.
R the GFB
-
And now for the news,
A formidable coalition of 150 Catholic, Orthodox and evangelical mother fuckers are calling on retarded people in a new manifesto to reject secular authority – and even engage in civil disobedience – if laws force them to accept abortion, same-sex marriage, other ideas that betray their religious beliefs, and anything else they can think of that reveals their irrelevance.
We take you now to a live feed of Roberto the Giant Fruit Bat who recently returned from Guam. What’s going on Roberto?
It’s absolute mayhem here, we are being told that just minutes before, a robed individual sporting a ridiculous haircut known as Friar Larry just destroyed a mailbox and while speaking in tongues then proceeded down this very street and maliciously kicked this cute little puppy named Billingsly.
See graphic
http://gregladen.com/wordpress/wp-content/graphics/cute_puppy.jpg
Back to the studio.
Thank you Roberto the Giant Fruit Bat
In other news, it has been reported that a 13 story residential building under construction in President Obama’s hometown of Chicago suddenly collapsed due to shoddy workmanship. The tax payer funded project as part of the stimulus package was to house undocumented immigrants and homeless transvestites. One fatality is reported and the monetary loss is estimated at 337 million US dollars. It was also leaked that the owners of the construction firm responsible were a partnership of Nancy Pelosi, Richard Durbin, and others yet not named, but most assuredly Democrats.
This just in, after a simple google search, we have learned that the building in question actually collapsed in Shanghai, China. We apologize for the clerical error. It seems this error was caused by a buffer over run of our equivocator software. The glitch has been corrected and of course this was accidental.
Now for a word from our sponsor.
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They’re not just big, They’re Giaganticiously chock full of Raspberry Delight in every bite!
Remember, the next time, when you are in the store with your parents, scream, whine and intimidate them into buying you the giant squishy sea monster every kid has to have!GIANT PINK RASPBERRY FLAVORED SQUIDS!
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now back to your regularly scheduled program………
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Right then, back to the news
Of course today is an official state holiday in the US known as Thanksgiving Day. Thanksgiving Day is a harvest festival celebrated primarily in Canada and the United States. Traditionally, it is a time to give thanks for the harvest and express gratitude in general and a time for celebrities to get photo ops taken with starving street urchins who typically haven’t eaten in 3 days.
The date and location of the first Thanksgiving celebration has been under debate. The traditional first Thanksgiving is the celebration that occurred at the site of Plymouth Plantation, Massachusetts in 1621. However, it is argued that the earliest attested “thanksgiving” celebration in what is now the United States was celebrated by the Spanish on September 8, 1565 in what is now Saint Augustine, Florida.
Early this morning, President Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero expressed outrage over the early morning US bombing raid leveling the Sarrià-Sant Gervasi district of Spain. In a brief statement provided by the State Department, “We are still looking into this horrendous mistake and express apologies to the Spanish people and world community. Early analysis supports a malfunction of the B1 stealth bombers state of the art equivocator software. Sorry”.
We will keep you abreast of the situation as further misinformation is available and of course when we are permitted to do so.
On the lighter side of this Holiday, President Obama adhered to tradition and pardoned a thanksgiving turkey as many of his predecessor have done in the past. This years lucky fellow, Walter, weighing in at a plump 45 pounds was seen frolicking on the white house lawn, but soon disappeared. Shortly after, it became known that Walter was a fugitive from justice and wanted for 18 grisly hatchet murders and the appalling sexual assault of a cute puppy named Billingsly.
Show graphic
http://gregladen.com/wordpress/wp-content/graphics/cute_puppy.jpg
Now to the sports with Biff Brinkman
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Not only that, but that MF Walter introduced tree snakes to Guam and the other Mariana Islands. You can run Water, but you cannot hide.
R the GFB
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In other news…..Here we are in suburban Cowpea Acres out side of the teeming metropolitan city of Des Moines, Iowa, where I, your special reporter, The Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured ,Squid am going to visit a typical American family on this very special Thanksgiving Day 2009.
I am having a slight problem manouvering my slithering squishy bulk up the front steps of this typical American suburban home, but with my 20 foot tentacles, I should have no problems reaching the door bell button….
(Ring…Ring!)
ahh, there’s someone opening the door now!And it’s a little girl! Hi! I’m The Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid and I’d like to know if I could come in and share your Thanksgiving Day Family Gathering with our TV viewers?
Little Girl: AUUUGGHHH! OH HELPP! IT’S A GIANT PINK SQUID ON THE FRONT PORCH!!!! PLEASE SAVE MEEE! AYYYEEEEEEEEE!
Now that was uncalled for! Little girl, what’s your name? Can your mommy come out and talk to our viewers about Thanksgiving? Wait…there’s some one coming, perhaps they’ll show us what Thanksgiving means to the friendly typical American people here in Cowpea Acres!
Voice behind door: OH MY FUCKIN LORD JEEZUS KEEERISTE! IT’S A GODDAM SEA MONSTER WITH GIANT PINK 20 FOOT TENTACLES! QUICK, GET THE GUN!
Folks, folks, calm down! I’m might be a giant squid, but I’m raspberry flavored! Are the relatives here from all over America? I can smell turkey and stuffing! Can I get someone out here to comment?
(suddenly 2 shotgun blasts come through rhe window…BLAMMO! that was a special effect, you’ll have to use your imagination here.)
Shit, they’re shooting at me. Well this is rude. Look,please, I’m just a giant squid trying to do my job here! NO REASON TO MAKE ME MADDD!(
(Two more shots ring out)
Cripes, I’m hit and oozing raspberry filling! HEY PEOPLE, UNCOOL! YOU BETTER KNOCK IT OFF BEFORE I MAKE YOU!
BLAMMOOOOO!
That did it!
The camera cuts away as the Giant Pink Raspberry Squid lashes out and grabs the little girl withone tentacle, the jerk with the gun with the other and destroys the house….
cut to a blank screen….
buzzz….frazzle…beep beep beep….
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I’m Biff Brinkman.
Thank you Giant Pink Raspberriy Squid for that heartwarming human and squid interest story.
Good Afternoon, I’m Biff Brinkman and it’s time once again, for the really really really big world of sports and stuff, I’m Biff Brinkman.
The Lions play today, until next time, I’m Biff Brinkman.
We return to the studio for late breaking news, I’m Bif,,,,,,,,,,,,,
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Thanks Biff, for that exciting Sports update.
You know, alot of our viewers don’t realize how important sports are in our daily lives. We see them, we get excited, we root for our favorite team,and then get plastered and go out and shoot up the neighbors house when they lose but here’s some important sports facts that you probably didn’t know!Did you know that if you took all the baseball bats ever produced and stacked them in a pile….they would obliterate the city of London, England, where the Queen lives!
Biff (providing lively repartee): Heck, Robbie, I bet she’d be surprised! Imagine looking out of your castle window and seeing nothinbg but bats…haw haw!
Robbie: Well, Biff, that’s just the beginning! If you could make all of the foot ball and soccer stadiums on the planet turn into giant punchbowls and filled them with grain alcohol and fruity liquids…every man woman and child coud stay completely plastered for the next 12,000 years! Imagine that!
Biff: Golly Robbie…that’s one long tall cool one…I have a question, where would they get all of the little paper umbrellas for the glasses? and woud we have to use up the polar ice cap for ice cubes? The mind bogglers at the very thought!
Robbie: I’ll have mine straight please! Here’s another one: If you put a million baby ducks on the surface of a soccer field and then let a soccer match be played under normal conditions…I’ll bet you couldn’t guess….
(voice over)
THIS IS A POURQUOI PAS SPECIAL BREAKING NEWS REPORT! WE ARE INTERRUPTING THE REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMMING AND TAKING YOU LIVE TO OUR STUDIOS FOR THIS IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!
PLEASE STAND BY……
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Thank you Rob and welcome back to the studio.
I’m Ted ShelfUnit,
Iran, known for its ground breaking advances in human rights policies, has issued a statement that Security Chief Mahammad Mehammod Mihammod Mohammod Muhammod, and Sometimes myhammod has received a Nobel Peace Prize for his selfless and humanitarian achievements. When asked for comment, Sometimes Myhammod’s official spokesman stated that the Security Chief was preoccupied in his weekly blood bath and could not comment at this time. He did mention that Sometimes Myhammod was very pleased with his recognition of work dating back to 2003 and stated that his skin is silky and smooth.
THIS JUST IN, (PHASER SOUND EFFECT) Norway has just issued this statement -
“Iranian authorities confiscated the 2003 Nobel Peace Prize given to human rights activist Shirin Ebadi, Norway said This morning.”
“The medal and the diploma have been removed from Dr. Ebadi’s bank box, together with other personal items. Such an act leaves us feeling shock and disbelief,” Norwegian Foreign Minister Jonas Gahr Store said in a written statement.
More from our lovely co-anchor Camille Toe,,,
Camille - Are you sure the Queen of England lives in London? I thought she lived in France?
When are they filling stadiums up with grain alcohol and oh I hope they use mango juice for mixer, I just love mango, I remember once in college, weThank you Camille, now more from our ace reporter Roberto the Giant Fruit Bat who of course until recently, has been in Guam. Are you there Roberto?
Roberto - Yes Ted I’m reporting from Tehran and it appears the news has spread like wildfire. Just minutes before, I spoke to a citizen who we will call “Reggie”. He demanded we not use his real name from fear of getting his eyes gouged out and all of his finger nails forcibly removed like this poor cute puppy named Billingsly. Show graphic
http://gregladen.com/wordpress/wp-content/graphics/cute_puppy.jpg
When pressed for comment, Reggie somewhat befuddled stated “Are you sure the Queen of England lives in London?”
Standing by as the story develops,,,,,,
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That’s right folks…your special reporter on the streets of Tehran, Boyd Croykin and you might well wonder why I’m whispering…and why the video feed is so blurry…
I’m actually wearing a triple X-tra large Burkha ensemble to hide the mobile satellite transmission dish which I am using to send this report to you live!
I am shooting the video through the veiled eye slits…
If I were found out by the Revolutionalry Guard Militia, they’d have their wicked way with me in the basement of the Tehran prison…oooohhhh….I don’t want to think about ti!
There is a situation developing now and we are trying to get some kind of verification from our sources, but Tehran seems to be under invasion from cute little cuddly dogs led by the heroic, Billingsley. They appeared here early this morning and seem to be on the streets in ever increasing numbers.
The effect they are having on the general population is pretty damn incredible.
One look into those big brown eyes and even the most rabid revolutionary guard stops in his tracks and says, “Awww, wook at da cute widdle puppy-wuppy.”
The the doggy rolls over on his back and lets the Revolutionary guard rub its tummy.
It’s amazing to witness the sight I am seeing all over Tehran now. Thousands of zealots stopped dead in their tracks, rubbing cute little dog tummies and chanting in unison…
“Dioes cute widdle puppy-wuppy want a widdle treat? Do you want daddy to rub your widdle earsy wearsies?”Wait, I’m getting a feed on my cell phone, there is a report that the Grand Ayatollah Kahmeni has abdicated! and, I don’t believe what I am hearing? He has agreed to transfer power to Billingsley, the cutest widdle puppy wuppy.
This is incredible, if opur reports are true, The Cute Widdle Puppie Wuppie, Billinglsey is now the Cute Widdle Grand Ayatollah-Whyatollah, Billingsley!Ooops someone is trying to snatch a feel under my burkha….I better move out of the area now because i still can’t be sure what would happen if I was discovered broadcasting in the middle of this puppie-wuppie wovey dovey coup d’etat!
This has been your special reporter on the streets of Tehran, on this seemingly historic occasion, Boyd Croykin….
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Kreft, A name you’ve learned to trust. You’re not fat, you’re awesome. Get your bucket today.
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This is to thank whomever is posting to keep this blog alive.
I spoke by phone to WhyNot today and he is still having difficulty getting his ADSL working in his new apartment, but he’s doing well and is at least in a warm place now instead of a cold and damp garage.
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That was a Public Service Announcement from Jeanette!
We repeat, Whynot has been located and the public is being warned to use caution when approaching him. He is thought to be armed with potentially dangerous ideas and socially abberational thoughts. If you see or think you see whynot, call the local authorities or alert the Pourquoi Pas 24 HOUR NEWS NETWORK! Where we will endlessly repeat the same news over and over again until you get tired of it, then we’ll think of something else!
Thank you Jeanette!Now for the Weather, sponsored by Kraft Foods! I’m your friendly weather guy, the immensely huge Harrold La Fleur and if I stand just out of the camera range, you might be able to see the map. Here on the east Coast, we have a wave of depression sweeping up from the South Atlantic, causing a flood of tears which are threatening to cause local flooding from the over flowing Sea of Sympathy.
Up in the Great Lakes region, we have an advancing wave of heartburn, nueritis and neuralgia which is causing local storms and a run on bicarbonate of soda. Look out for massive belching and isolated burps in the mid afternoon.Sun sould start to peek through the clouds on the west coast after the Kraft Cheese Blizzard finishes up…we have reports of mountains of mozarella, drifts of shredded Swiss up to 15 feet in some regions and some areas are reporting that they are just beginning to eat their way through the prewrapped Kraft indiviual slices.. The governemt promises to start assisting with loaves of wonder bread and a shipment of toasted sandwich makers.
The forecast from Mexico is Chili today and Hot Tamale………….
back to the news room, I’m the extremely massive Harrold La Feur and that was the latest weather update brought to you by Kraft Foods!
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back in the Pourquoi Pas Newsroom, this just into the news desk!
The Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid has been contained and taken into custody after destroying an entire block of homes in Cowpea Acres, Iowa, just outside of Des Moines.
The State National Guard Unit sustained injuries, but reported that the giant pink sea moster was actually crammed with a delicious raspberrry filling that was very good spread on buttered toast and used in the worlds largest jelly roll cake which is now being served.
A urgent plea is going out for flaked coconut for the topping.
The Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid did make a statement after his capture in which he expressed his extreme remorse for his outburst and gave his condolences for the victims of the Thanksgiving day violence.
He did state that if they hadn’t started to shoot at him, nothing would have happened and the hopes every one enjoys the cake….. -
Thank you Biff, On top of it as always,
I’m Chet Overland,
Like most viewers, you’ve more than likely heard about the The Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid on yesterday’s broadcast. The less than “embracing” welcome from the mid-west folk an al that.
Some say the Squid was asking for it, some say the squid was just looking for answers,,,,,,,
We bring you now to (very loud noise, 14 db higher than what you just heard)
Race Bangley for the (pause, explosion) Real Fucking Story.
I’m Race Bangley and we’re here with,,,,,,
The Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid has been contained and taken into custody after destroying an entire block of homes in Cowpea Acres, Iowa,
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Am I on? Am I on?
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Skreewee(scrambled digiatal imagwe jerks around then comes into focus…)
We seem to be having a bit of trouble with the feed here in Cowpea Acres….
But our crack Pourquoi pas Tech team seem to have it sorted out….
I am Race Bangley, on the scene of this utter devestation. An entire neighborhood wiped out in a Thanksgiving day tragedy by an enraged Giant Sea Monster….
The enormity of the devstation is just beginning to be assessed. Here, a discarded carcass of a turkey, tuffing spilling out of it in a seemingly obscene display of highly suggestive semi pornographic…ohh…oops, sorry folks…I got my scripts mixed up with the review of Sarah Palin’s latest Cinema presentation, “Going Rouge All Over” a must see!he Giant Squid has been contained in a large semi tractor trailer and I’m told we can have a few words with him…let’s go on over, the National Guard Units are hosing down the streets which are covered with this sticky pink goo…..
Mr. Squid, I’m Race Rangley and we would like to know if you have a statement for the public?
Rasberry Squid: Oh, I’m so sorry. You can’t know how miserable I feel. I tried so hard to rise above my base primeval sea monster instincts. I wanted to work in television news for so long. I even ore a suit and tie…well, th suit had 8 arms and the tie was not whart I would have picked to go with my complexion, but that’s the sacrifice I was willing to make.
Sob…I just wanted people tto like me….not just for my tasty raspberry filling, but to get to know me, just another regular Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid,…now,sob…sob…I uhhh, don’t know…ohhh…blahhh hahhh hahhhhh
(The Giant Squid is consumed in sorrow and bawls incoherently)Race Bangley: (wiping a tear from his cheek) :There you have it folks, a Giant sea Monster who just wanted to loved and accepted. He had the same dreams as the rest of us. The same highs, the same lows, the same goals, aspirations , good qualities and tragic faults…
A Squid who was just too human and now?
…sniffle…sob….well, his fate is in our hands….Back to you Biff in the Pourquoi Pas newsroom, this is Race Bangley…sob…and I really can’t go on…sniffle…this is just too damn sad…
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Back at the Pourquoi Pas newsdesk…sob…I’m sorry folks, I’m just a little teared up from Race’s tragic report from Cowpea Acres….
Well.that’s the suject of todays viewer poll! Question: Should the Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid be forgiven and allowed to pursue his dreams and eventually find happiness?
Or, Should he be melted down and made into jelly roll filling?That’s our viewer poll question for today….
Ann Marie Earwig (sprightly co anchor): Hey Biff, I don’t want to influence the viewer poll, but I thought I might pass along an earlier conversation I had with the Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid before this tragedy occurred.
He told me confidentially that he was a huge Sarah Palin fan and he adored her and his eventual ambition was to find, kill and devour Todd Palin, her husband so he could meet Sarah and mate with her. Now that could make a very exciting sequel to her first book! -
Who is the Giant Pink Rasperry Flavored Squid? Barb?
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Now that would be very interesting, if Barb was a giant pink eight armed sea monster and wanted to mate with Sarah Palin….Heck, we’d have to get one of those huge glass walled tanks like they have at Sea World and we could sell tickets and become millionaires!
Hi Stilletto………nice to see your name on a post. I miss you…..
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Microdot,
“Now that would be very interesting, if Barb was a giant pink eight armed sea monster and wanted to mate with Sarah Palin…”
Ah hem… what do you mean “IF Barb was…”? Where ya been lately? I’m already a billionaire. Got Barb/Sarah copulating live shows every night. You should see what they do with the giant squids, it’s just awesome, tentacles in every orifice, and don’t forget all those succion cups, man, it’s an orgasmic orgy on a monumental scale.
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We are getting some results in our Pourquoi Pas 24 Hour News Network Viewers Poll…
It looks like 2 thimbs up for the big pink squishy guy, but only if he was really a woman from Ohio named Barb and was going to perform sordid aquatic spawning rituals in a big tank at Sea World….
I’m not sure how to rate that …at least we haven’t gotten any votes to melt the multi tentacle menace down into raspberry filling for junk food treats yet! -
Ohhh Yah?
Listen, If the Big Pink Creep from the Deep doesn’t make good on his claim to want to kill and devour Todd Palin first, then I say melt him down!There’s one thing I don’t have clear in all of this. If the Squid gets hus wish, to live and spawn with Sarah Palin, will she lay eggs? Will we have a tank full of little fundamentalist larvae Palin Squids swimming around…
Wat would happen if they were accidentally released into the environment?
Many times, what seems like a good idea now…has very unintended results….Nah…Melt the sucker down!
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Well, there’s a little action on the Pourquoi Pas 24 Hour News Poll…
One definite thiumbs down….
and 2 kind of thumbs up….
Well keep you posted as the votes come in…
Now we have a real Human Interest story from someone we haven’t heard from for a while,
our reporter, Roberto The Giant Fruit Bat! -
Sorry. I have ben mucho busy searching for the the bubbling tar pits, the sulfurous wasteland, the rotting forests, and the stagnant mud flats of the land of Gorch, alas to no avail. Whither King Ploobis and Queen Peuta? Ou sont le Scred d’etain? Come back to us Mighty Favog and Wisss.
microdot! Companero! You may not advocate “melting down” the Giant Pink Raspberry Flavored Squid. The GPRFS is protected by the Endangered Species Act of 1973, about which I learned in night classes on Guam, in addition to several international treaties and conventions. So hands off the titanic cephalopod. Treat him like the royalty he is. Did you know that squids can change their sex? Anyway, I should not worry about the squid actually breeding with Sarah Palin inasmuch as most inter species relationships do work out and this one will nly end in tears. The best you could hope for would be a mule that resembles a Libertarian or an Evangelical Hinny. Remember, feed a squid and starve a fever.
This has been Roberto the Giant Fruit Bat and batting About. Back to to you Biff.
R the GFB
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I’ve broken my 20 year vow silence to say,,,
Kill that ungodly pink mother fucker.
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Wow, the wonders of Calcutta-style internet connections.
Since there is nothing working in the new place I live in (no tel, no internet, the electric only works in one room), I resorted to ask my upstairs neighbor Ludovic if I could “borrow” his internet connection.
He’s real cool and said “no wocking furries, mate” (that’s the Aussie equivalent, I won’t bore you with the original FR version). So we drilled holes in walls and window panes, ran a 100 meter ethernet cable from his Internet rig in his apartment to mine, and after not that much fucking around, Bob’s Kristina’s uncle all over again, bingo, I’m here to plague ya’ll again.
That is… if that keeps working.
It’s funny cuz I’m typing from the bedroom on a notebook, bedroom where there is no electric, no lights in particular. The only light there is the reflection of the LCD screen onto the keyboard, so forgive the typos.
PS: Stiletto darling,
I see you’re taking good care of the spammers. Love ya baby.
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This is a public service alert from the PQP 24 Hour News Center….The blogger known as WhyNot has been located and the public is being warned to use extreme caution.
He has been known to have allegedly used logic, and subversive reasoning to make points with unsuspecting innocent citizens such as your self…We will keep you updated on the latest developments as thy occur!
Keep Calm, Don’t panic and TRY TO ACT NORMAL!This has Been a Punlic service Announcement from PQP 24 Hour News!
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Hello…am I on….??? Is this mike working…
The world is still reeling from the News That the blogger known as Whynot has emerged from his seclusion and is attempting to communicate with us.
A worried nation wonders, What does this mean….?
Meanwhile, back here on the scene in Cowpea Acres, Iowa the alert has gone out that The Big Squid Has Escaped!
Could the re emergence of Why Not and the Big Pink Sea Monster’s escape somehow be related?Reports say that after the tide of public opinion seemed to turn against the Rogue Creepy tentacled Creature from the Deep, the enraged Squid destroyed the containment facility, leaving a trail of tasty raspberry goo behind him slithering in a generally France ward direction….Some say that he was aided by a huge unidentified Fruit bat with a Spanish accent!
The residents of Cow pea Acres have formed a militia and are hunting him down by torchlight as we speak…The National Guard has been alerted and the trail of goo has been traced to the shores of Lake Michigan…..
We will keep you updated on the latest developments! Authorities fear that if the Squid and Whynot ever actually link up, they would be unstoppable and we would be faced with planetary domination by this unbeatable force. Let’s pray we aren’t too late!
This is Race Bangley, in the Raspberry flavoured slime pit that once was CowPea Acres, Iowa, signing off…Good Luck and Good Night!
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Hey, Hey Whynot! Hooray for ethernet! A determined blogger will not be kept down! Good to see you in print!
Watch out for the fruitbats and squids… -
We interrupt your previously scheduled program for this breaking exclusive seen only on Pourquoi Pas Action News.
I’m Chad Wildebeast.
The Giant Pink Raspberry Squid, still on the lam from his recent break from authorities is rumored to be off the coast of Japan. And this time, he is not alone. Multiple reports state that the squid has amassed and mobilized an army of giant jelly fish. Some, as large as Sumo wrestlers weighing in at more than 600 pounds while there are unconfirmed reports that some are much larger with origins from Northwest Ohio.
It appears the target is the fishing industry which has the Japanese Navy and Coast Guard at full alert. Losses to the industry are already estimated to have exceeded 100 million and 4 trawlers are confirmed sunk. Rescue ships and choppers are speeding to the scene.
Back to your previously scheduled program.
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So my efforts at conservation of endangered species, comme moi, have resulted in my good name being sullied. Mano, I need a pina colada.
And for your information, pina coladas are not made with raspberries.
Roberto the Giant Fruit Bat
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Squaaazzzzonk…skrreee….whup..whup…whup….whazzup up folks? It’s me, the Giant Pink Raspberry Flavoured Squid…and I’m interrrupring your newscast to send my message of 1,000,000 gazillion volts of Raspberrry Flavoured LUV!
Now that I am free and have my jellyfish friends who have convinced me that it is okay to change my sex…thanks to counseling from muy amigo, Roberto the Giant Fruit Bat…I am not in love with Sarah Palin anymore!
If these jellyfish can have sex with them selves, then maybe I can change my sex, but not my delicious Raspberry falvour!
So, my wonderful human friends can all call me Rosalita…now I am Rosalita the Giant PINK and voluptously Sexy Raspberry Flavoured Squid of LUV and I LUV Monsieur Whynot! I think French guys are soooo sexy!
I have harnessed the powed of all the electric eels and catfish in the world to provide enough energy to create our own aquatic broadcasting systtem! All my wriggley friends are working with me to help me achieve my goal!
WHYNOT! WE ARE WRIGGLING IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION! HAAAHHH! HAHA! HAAAHHHH!
Do not attempt to excape because it is destiny! -
Holy Cow Of Toledo! I just came back in the room and my computer is covered with raspberry goo!
My iLivebox is full of fish…the entire room smells like an anchovie piizza! something strange has happened to my computer and all I can see on the screen is a screen saver that looks like a gold fish tank…the fish are just swimming around……
I think I have to have my computer drained…… -
Microdot,
“So, my wonderful human friends can all call me Rosalita…now I am Rosalita the Giant PINK and voluptously Sexy Raspberry Flavoured Squid of LUV and I LUV Monsieur Whynot! I think French guys are soooo sexy!”
LOLLLL, the giant pink voluptuous rasperry flavoured squid of love? I thought it was Barb, no? And I’m not so sure Whynot is really French, actually no coutry wants to say he belongs to it, LOL.
“My iLivebox is full of fish…the entire room smells like an anchovie piizza!”
LOLLL, what’s a iLivebox? A MAC thing? Anchovie… this makes me think of a rock singer called Bonchovie or something close.
This blog is becoming more crazy every day, and it’s fun. But thank you for using your normal nickname because I was getting lost guessing who is who.
PS: Rosalita is a beautiful name for my ears. It makes me think of Rio de Janeiro and all the beautiful girls at the carnival and on the beaches. And the good looking guys also, of course, LOL.
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Valerie, I haven’t gotten the eeeeeeels out of my cccccomputtterr yetttt….
I tried to type a message but there is a wierd screen saver with little squids chasing guppies all over the screeeeeeen.
I cleaned upo the raspberry goop, it’s actually pretty good on buttered toast.My LiveBos is the thingie I got from Orange for ADSL…the eels put an i in fromt of it…
I wonder if anyone else has had these kind of fishy problems with the internet lately?
Anchoviies is English for Anchois….and they really stink the place up.
Say, can I borrow your mop?I think whynot has to be extra careful when he turns on the water in his new apartment…who knows what could come out?
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Well, truth is stranger than fishin’. I read this in the newspaper this morning. Another horror story about invasive, alien species:
CHICAGO—Fears that giant, voracious species of carp will get into the Great Lakes and wipe out other fish have led to rising demands that the government close the waterway connecting the lakes to the Mississippi River — an unprecedented step that could disrupt the movement of millions of tons of iron ore, coal, grain and other goods
The dispute could become an epic clash of competing interests: commerce, environmentalists and fishermen.
Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm and five environmental groups threatened Wednesday to sue the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers to force it to temporarily shut three shipping locks near Chicago because of evidence that Asian carp may have breached the electrical barrier that is supposed to hold them back from the lakes.
The environmental groups went further than the governor and said the Great Lakes and the Mississippi should be permanently separated to avert what Granholm called “ecological disaster.”
Col. Vincent Quarles, commander of the Corps’ Chicago district, said the agency is considering all options but would not close the locks without first studying the possible effects.
Environmentalists fear the fish, which consume up to 40 percent of their body weight daily in plankton, could starve out smaller and less aggressive competitors and cause the collapse of the $7 billion-a-year Great Lakes sport and commercial fishing industry.
The carp — which can grow to 4 feet long and 100 pounds and are known for leaping out of the water when boats are near — were imported by Southern fish farms but escaped into the Mississippi in large numbers during flooding in the 1990s and have been making their way northward ever since.
The Mississippi and the Great Lakes are connected by a complex, 250-mile network of rivers and canals engineered more than a century ago. It runs from Chicago, on the southern edge of Lake Michigan, to a spot on the Mississippi just north of St. Louis.
The American Waterways Operators, a trade association representing the tug and barge industry, said closing the locks would lead to higher shipping costs because commodities would have to be sent overland via truck or train across Illinois before being put back onto vessels.
“The impact is going to be large,” said Lynn Muench, the group’s senior vice president for regional advocacy in St. Louis. “It could definitely impact day-to-day living.”
Tens of millions of tons of goods are moved annually along the shipping canals or through the locks that lead into Lake Michigan. Muench had no estimate of the value of the cargo, which includes salt, sugar, molasses, cement, scrap metal and petroleum.
In the continuing struggle to keep the fish out, Illinois environmental officials began dumping poison Wednesday night in a nearly six-mile stretch of the Chicago Sanitary and Ship Canal near Lockport to kill off the carp while the electrical barrier is turned off for maintenance.Continued…
Chief Petty Officer Robert Lanier of the U.S. Coast Guard said workers began dumping a fish toxin called rotenone into the canal about 8 p.m. and would continue the poisoning until some time Thursday morning. Crews then planned to use large cranes with nets to scoop up an estimated 200,000 pounds of dead fish, which will be taken to a landfill.
The electrical barrier, installed in 2002 to repel fish with a non-lethal jolt, has long been the only thing standing between the carp and Lake Michigan, the gateway to the four other lakes. But officials said two weeks ago that DNA from Asian carp had been found between the barrier and one of the locks near the lake. No actual carp have been found in Lake Michigan.
Environmentalists and Granholm said the locks should be closed while the scope of the problem is established.
“This is an immediate threat to the Great Lakes, to our sport and commercial fishery, and as such it requires some emergency actions appropriate to the level of that threat,” said Ken DeBeaussaert, director of Michigan’s Office of the Great Lakes. “Closing the locks to prevent the possible spread of the Asian carp into the Great Lakes is an appropriate response on an emergency basis.”
The environmental groups also said the government should find a way to permanently separate — through physical barriers or other means — the Great Lakes and Mississippi watersheds so the invasive species has no way of passing between the two.
Last fall, environmental groups offered several possible solutions, including erecting concrete walls, constructing more locks, even lifting barges over the locks.
The issue “takes on a whole new urgency because of the Asian carp emergency,” said Andy Buchsbaum of the National Wildlife Federation. “We don’t know where the carp are, and the risk of their being in the canals is too great.”
Some fishing enthusiasts doubt the government will consider closing the locks. Dan Thomas, president of the Elmhurst, Ill.-based Great Lakes Sport Fishing Council, said too many industries and too many jobs would probably be affected.
“Ideally it’s the way to go, but many things that are ideal don’t always come to fruition because there are too many other circumstances,” he said. “They can still be contained, but only with concerted effort and a sense of urgency to do what is necessary on a timely basis.”
Scientists say more than 180 invasive species have entered the Great Lakes, multiplying rapidly and feeding on native species or competing with them for food. Millions of dollars have been spent trying to control the zebra mussel and the round goby fish, which already have moved between the Great Lakes and Mississippi River basins.
Chief Petty Officer Robert Lanier of the U.S. Coast Guard said workers began dumping a fish toxin called rotenone into the canal about 8 p.m. and would continue the poisoning until some time Thursday morning. Crews then planned to use large cranes with nets to scoop up an estimated 200,000 pounds of dead fish, which will be taken to a landfill.
The electrical barrier, installed in 2002 to repel fish with a non-lethal jolt, has long been the only thing standing between the carp and Lake Michigan, the gateway to the four other lakes. But officials said two weeks ago that DNA from Asian carp had been found between the barrier and one of the locks near the lake. No actual carp have been found in Lake Michigan.
Environmentalists and Granholm said the locks should be closed while the scope of the problem is established.
“This is an immediate threat to the Great Lakes, to our sport and commercial fishery, and as such it requires some emergency actions appropriate to the level of that threat,” said Ken DeBeaussaert, director of Michigan’s Office of the Great Lakes. “Closing the locks to prevent the possible spread of the Asian carp into the Great Lakes is an appropriate response on an emergency basis.”
The environmental groups also said the government should find a way to permanently separate — through physical barriers or other means — the Great Lakes and Mississippi watersheds so the invasive species has no way of passing between the two.
Last fall, environmental groups offered several possible solutions, including erecting concrete walls, constructing more locks, even lifting barges over the locks.
The issue “takes on a whole new urgency because of the Asian carp emergency,” said Andy Buchsbaum of the National Wildlife Federation. “We don’t know where the carp are, and the risk of their being in the canals is too great.”
Some fishing enthusiasts doubt the government will consider closing the locks. Dan Thomas, president of the Elmhurst, Ill.-based Great Lakes Sport Fishing Council, said too many industries and too many jobs would probably be affected.
“Ideally it’s the way to go, but many things that are ideal don’t always come to fruition because there are too many other circumstances,” he said. “They can still be contained, but only with concerted effort and a sense of urgency to do what is necessary on a timely basis.”
Scientists say more than 180 invasive species have entered the Great Lakes, multiplying rapidly and feeding on native species or competing with them for food. Millions of dollars have been spent trying to control the zebra mussel and the round goby fish, which already have moved between the Great Lakes and Mississippi River basins.
At least Rosalita, the giant pink raspberry flavored squid appears to be friendly.
TLGK
-
Thank your for that extremely long, factual, verbatim news item lifted from a news service and reprinted here to sober us all up and put a halt to this silliness…I guess tea time’s over, Now, back on your heads!
This is Race Bangley, signing off……., -
Hey, Race…..teatime’s never over here on the PQP 24 Hours All The News All The Time Network!
I’m sure our viewers are just dying to hear our special guest editorialist, TLGK, tell us why he thinks the concern for global warming is a huge world conspiracy of fascist scientists trying to impose their fascist restrictions on our unbridled use of CO2 emitting technologies!
Heck, it’s getting a bit chilly here in the PQP Newsroom…is global warming relly a hoax, or hey, did our immensely massive weather reproter, Harrold LeFleur turn up the air conditioning again?
Coming up…later in this report…TLGK and the global warming conspiracy revealed! -
TLGK,
“Last fall, environmental groups offered several possible solutions, including erecting concrete walls, constructing more locks, even lifting barges over the locks.”
You know, it’s strange because what I read from this, it’s just like everywhere else: humans fuck with nature, want to keep what they want and destroy the rest or keep it out of its natural habitat or ways of surviving - for OUR convenience/safety/greed/comfort.
It’s like the rabbits and the canetoads in Australia - what pathetic & pitiful ecological disaster stories; should I mention the myxomatose disease used to control the explosive rabbit population growth 2 centuries ago? Deliberately introducing a deadly disease to a species to wipe it off “en masse” because we fucked up so badly in the first place?
The canetoad story is even more staggering. Leaves your Michigan Lake fish story for dead.
Why do we humans do this? It’s because we humans think we have a right of supremacy on this planet earth, and know better than the whole intricate universe. And even if it means killing everything else and destroying the balance in a short term, then it is justified. Humans want to play god, but unfortunately for them, they are fucking useless mostly - they only mostly end up killing each others as well as eradicating entire species.
We are gravely mistaken: nature is stronger than us. Yes, we can eradicate species in a few years, faster than any natural changes in nature during millions of years, the same way as we can kill each others in millions in just a few years (or even days); yes, we can create human societies with winners and others who are slave and serve them. And as well we find moral justifications to make this “right”: “they” are the bad humans and so we must kill them or at least make them slaves of us - the “good” humans.
Even when we start off our crusades on “ecologocal” grounds, we still manage to fuck it all up on a monumental scale:
We find that when we cull the elephants in South Africa because they seem to destroy all the acacia tree forests, we fuck with the system so bad because we are so fucking ignorant. And instead of seeing a cycle whereby the elephants growing out of self-sustain herds and indeed “apparently going on a rampage on the acacia tress, they, then in turn suffer the consequence and die away to let the rest of nature start again, then in turn florishing again.
And guess what? It works; apart from the minor impact of human poachers for ivory and for the significant impact of South Africa’s machine gunning terrorized herds of elephant from helicopters, the African elephant/acaccia tree balance work just fine, thank you Sir.
Instead, what do we humans do? We rule it all with machine guns aboard helicopters. “Fucking elephants, geee the fuckers just have NO FUCKING IDEA how nature works! Really, what ignorant cunts they are, we humans have to explain to them the way to make things sustainable! Just as well we invented AK47s - if it weren’t for us, this planet would be in a sad state indeed”
Then nature fights back, and we go and cry mommy, and we wonder why nature is more completely fucked now than it was 200 years ago.
Microdot,
“Coming up…later in this report…TLGK and the global warming conspiracy revealed!”
Yeah, can’t wait…
-
Damnit, does that mean I can’t do the story about the makeover of the SunMaid Raisin girl? They gave her a monster set of tits.
-
Chase Findley,
“I can’t do the story about the makeover of the SunMaid Raisin girl? They gave her a monster set of tits.”
Bigger than Belgium? Are they inflatable? Could have they been used to save the Titanic’s passengers and crew? Dang, I hate the thought of missing out on taking a glimpse; can you send a pic?
-
Chase,
Is there a Sun Maid Grape Girl? After all, I am a Giant Fruit Bat not a Giant Dried Fruit Bat.
R the GFB
-
The Loop Garoo Kid here, giving a guest editorial. My experience has taught me a number of very valuable life lessons such as never drink anything of an alcoholic nature that is blue; never get involved in a land war in Asia; and never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line.
In the words of that great philosopher Fred the Bird, “Politics is poopadoodle.” The Loop Garoo Kid’s corollary to this axiom is “Therefore, never mix science with politics or you risk contaminating the science and having it turn into poopadoodle.”
As for WhyNot, it is difficult to determine whether his position is that “Science is bad” or merely that “Bad Science is bad.” Clearly the introduction of alien species to Australia for animal husbandry purposes or pest control purposes was a mistake. Nevertheless, the human species, is the only one on the planet with the ability to exert radical control over the environment and we have been doing so for millennia. That is how agriculture was invented and animal husbandry. Once we, as a species, were able to devote time to other activities than those necessary for mere survival, we were able to invent art, which by and large is a good thing. Yes, mistakes were made, but not all of them purposeful. The Black Plague; zebra mussels and sea lampreys in the Great Lakes; Asian termites in New Orleans; brown tree snakes in the Marianas; avian malaria in the Hawaiian Islands, all arrived as a result of trade and commerce which are not inherently evil human activities.
John Wilton wrote: “A man should never be where his dog does not belong. Or as Dylan says, a man should never be where he does not belong. And having your dog with you lets you know when you’re someplace you shouldn’t be and though you might not care about yourself, you have to take care of the dog.”
This has been the Loop Garoo Kid, back to you Biff.
-
Is there a Sun Maid Grape Girl? After all, I am a Giant Fruit Bat not a Giant Dried Fruit Bat.
http://adweek.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/sunmaid_1.jpg
Oh Roberto !!!!!!!!
Would you a like to pick a juicy plump a grape? They are the sweetest of a grape. You a know you a want one. Come here and pick a plump grape, then you pick a 2. How you a like my big a tittys Roberto? Come have a juicy a grape and then you pluck my big a titty. Then you pluck a 2. Follow a me into the vineyard Roberto. I know a special a place. I know you a like grape Roberto, big sweet a juicy a grape.
-
Senorita! Te amo! Je vous adore
Because I am a frugivore.
Your luscious globes fresh from the vine,
Excite my taste buds every time.
Your breasts, though noble, do not excite,
Your tiny orbs I yearn to bite.
No vampire I, I eschew your nape,
I’ll pass in favor of your grapes!
So let us dally in your vineyard’s bower,
Whilst you peel me grapes for hours and hours,
And even if you cannot fly,
I’ll be your slave Pteropodidae.
In labruscum veritas, I will sip to that
And be forever, your megabat.R the GFB
-
SunMaid,
“Come here and pick a plump grape, then you pick a 2. How you a like my big a tittys Roberto? Come have a juicy a grape and then you pluck my big a titty.”
LOLLLLL, you sound like Chico Marx in the Marx Brothers movies.
Roberto,
“And even if you cannot fly,
I’ll be your slave Pteropodidae.”Is it like a pterodactyl like in Jurrassic Park?
-
did shumbuddy say sumthin about a vineyard? all this sex changing and being a fugy-a-tiv ish getting too damn depreshing…hic…I’m gonna…gonna…hic, burrrrrrpppp….Oh yeah shit…I fergot what I was talkin about….
hic…lishen…c’mer…I wannna show you somethin…you ever see a squid change sex before…urrrpppp….
lishen, where’s dat grape lady?
Hey Sunny Babe, c’mer I wanna show you sumpthin…..
you know where a squid can get a drinky winky aroun’ here…
ooooooo….shit…I don’ feel so good……………. -
Rashperry vodka squid,
“I’m gonna…gonna…hic, burrrrrrpppp….Oh yeah shit…I fergot what I was talkin about….”
LOLLL, I bet you’re Microdot and you’ve been doing the vendanges with to much zeal, tasting every bottle of wine to make sure the grapes were ripe, LOL.
Have you read “Asterix chez les Bretons”? The whole Roman army gets drunk tasting all the barrels they confiscated from hotels because one of them must be the magic potion that Asterix and Obelix brought from Gaule to help the English beat Cesar’s army.
Of course every Roman soldier becomes completely drunk after a short while, and “jay talk juch like geesh”. It’s one of the funniest Asterix books.
Do you have Asterix books in America?
-
Valérie,
“Do you have Asterix books in America?”
They did in Tampa (and suburbs - it’s in Florida, in case you wonder) libraries when I was there. They even have them in Sydney’s libraries (I kept a couple as souvenirs, lol).
Rassshperry flavored squid Microdot,
“you know where a squid can get a drinky winky aroun’ here…”
Funny you should mention this; it reminds me of Black Adder, the last series, taking place during WW1 (might be WW2). At some stage some stuffy UK general takes his “doggie woggie” to the vet cuz he has a problem with his “dicky wicky”.
Anyone seen Black Adder? Even better than Monty Python.
-
This is the Loop Garoo Kid w/ another guest commentary. It has been more than 48 hours since we last heard from WhyNot and I begin to fear the worst. Together w/ Griffon Ghost Dog of the North, I have been combing the post Apocalyptic Outlands for any trace of that Commie bastard. The only sign we have found is a massive track of raspberry scented dried goo extending to the horizon while the sands are criss-crossed by the shadow cast by what appears to be a gigantic bat.
Thus far Griffon and I have managed to avoid sand pirates, outlaw bikers, and Oakland Raiders fans. The few inhabitants of these wastelands seem in a state of denial regarding planetary climate change and any reference to WhyNot elicits naught but blank stares in their haunted eyes.
We continue to move after nightfall under a waning moon and will report at the next opportunity.
Over and out.
TLGK
-
I’m Bud Sheezley,
Unconfirmed report just in, the incorrigible French Commie Bastard Whynot was rumoured to be taken by medivac helicoptor to the Hôpital de l’Institut Pasteur. Speculation at this point leads to a massive sugar shock due to the delicious sweet pink slimy material found on his face. It appears the menace to society, the giant pink raspberry squid has changed his sex once again. Doctors are working feverishly at the moment to resusitate the Commie Bastard with tobacco smoke enemas, heart shock defibrillators, and with naked pictures of those whom shall not be named.
Another caller states “Whynot has lost his spectacles”. Had someone stolen them, had he mislaid them? “He probably ate them thinking they were a carrot”.
More as the story unfolds.
-
Bud Sheezley/Mr P,
“Doctors are working feverishly at the moment to resusitate the Commie Bastard with tobacco smoke enemas, heart shock defibrillators, and with naked pictures of those whom shall not be named. ”
Lol, this will probably work, especially the naked women pictures - but I hope you are not thinking of Barb on the jesus cross one.
I don’t have much news, only that he sent me an email saying the internet connection is fucked, and he arrange with a neighbor to share his with network cables going through the windows of apartments, but it only works sometimes.
TLGK,
“Together w/ Griffon Ghost Dog of the North, I have been combing the post Apocalyptic Outlands for any trace of that Commie bastard. The only sign we have found is a massive track of raspberry scented dried goo extending to the horizon while the sands are criss-crossed by the shadow cast by what appears to be a gigantic bat.
Thus far Griffon and I have managed to avoid sand pirates, outlaw bikers, and Oakland Raiders fans. The few inhabitants of these wastelands seem in a state of denial regarding planetary climate change and any reference to WhyNot elicits naught but blank stares in their haunted eyes.
We continue to move after nightfall under a waning moon and will report at the next opportunity.”Lol, sorry that I repeat nearly your whole comment, but I found it so nice and funny poetry. You are a very talented writer. Do you make speeches like this in your court cases?
-
A few hours b/f dawn, Griffon and I encountered a crew of sand pirates who emerged from behind a dune. They were thirteen in number, as are all crews of sand pirates. No doubt they thought a solitary traveler and his retriever easy prey.
I drew Deinonychus, my wave bladed katana from the scabbard of my back. Griffon assumed his aspect of the Ghost Dog of the North, huge, fanged, clawed, slavering, and luminously white in the wan moonlight. The front row of pirates halted in their tracks. Some at the rear attempted to flee.
It was over in in less than a minute. We stopped only long enough for me to search the bodies and for Griffon to feed, fresh meat being in short supply in the Outlands. I found no evidence that WhyNot had been unlucky enough to encounter these reivers b/f we did. I found a number of jewels, including a rather fine diamond necklace centered by a huge emerald that I removed from the body of the man I judged to have been their captain.
Then we walked on as the dawn spread its rosy fingers across the eastern sky, following the track of what I now know to be the Giant Raspberry Flavored Squid. What motive impelled WhyNot to follow this creature into the wastelands, in this dimension where the present interfaces w/ the past and future and where the empirical collides w/ the imaginary?
An hour after sunrise we reached a circle in the sand, superimposed over the track of the Giant Squid. The circle in the sand was caused by the down draft of a medivac helicopter which appears to have rescued WhyNot. Half covered w/ sand blasted by the downdraft of its ascent, we found a crumpled pack of Gauloises; the cap from a bag of IV saline, a well thumbed paperback edition of “The Communist Manifesto” in French; and a pair of lederhosen that had been scissored off of someone by the flight for life paramedics. On the left leg, in embroidered lavender Cyrillic script were the initials “PP.”
Someone had reached this place b/f us. Circling the area were the tracks of a single set of bare footprints, a woman’s by the look of them. We also found a few strands of gossamer golden hair.
I looked at Griffon, again in his mortal form. “Kendra?” I asked, naming the semi mythical warrior babe of the Outland. Griffon sniffed at the hairs and tracks, smiled at me and winked one luminous golden eye.
Then we left, following the track. In that direction, I suspect lies the sea. It would make sense for the Giant Squid to seek the salt water and it is in that direction we last saw the gigantic bat outlined against the setting moon. I took the paperback copy of “The Communist Manifesto” w/ me, toilet paper too being in short supply in the Outlands.
Behind us, riding the morning thermals over the dunes, vultures began to circle where we had encountered the sand pirates. Their dark forms rose and fell in an hour glass pattern over the still forms of the pirates for whom the sands of time had run out.
Until next time.
TLGK
-
TLGK,
“… Behind us, riding the morning thermals over the dunes, vultures began to circle where we had encountered the sand pirates. Their dark forms rose and fell in an hour glass pattern over the still forms of the pirates for whom the sands of time had run out.”
I think like Stiletto, you write beautifully; it’s like reading a novel. Have you thought of writing novels? It must be more exciting than writing speeches for criminals.
I have read 2 of John Grisham books that Whynot recommended as a good and easy to read American writer. Maybe you know him? He writes all his books about court cases. I like him very much, and it’s true, it’s not hard to understand.
-
TLGK,
Right on. This is an action tale like no other. I suspect that emerald ripped off of the dead mans chest may have some significance?
Hi Valérie and Stiletto. Whynot is ok. He is just waiting for internet service and such.
-
Mr P,
“Whynot is ok. He is just waiting for internet service and such.”
From what he told me, he is transforming Salindres into Calcutta with network cables hanging out of every window. Soon everybody in France will have Internet connected from his neighbor, lol.
-
Stiletto,
“he is transforming Salindres into Calcutta with network cables hanging out of every window. Soon everybody in France will have Internet connected from his neighbor, lol.”
LOLLLL, I can picture this: Salindres with network cables crossing the sky between windows, LOL. Whynot, do people hang their clothes to dry on the network cables, LOL?
-
Hey Valérie,
“Whynot, do people hang their clothes to dry on the network cables, LOL?”
A few have tried. Most are now in hospital in critical condition following me throwing T-Rex onto them. The few unfortunate ones who didn’t survive now experience a new life as “born again pizza topping”.
How’s life in Paris, sweetie pie? Sorry I haven’t emailed you for a long time - lotsa shit happening in my life lately.
-
Chapter 3: Walking toward the wine dark sea
We followed the slimed track, and the barefooted prints that paralleled it for two days across the wasteland. By day we sheltered beneath a tent made from my gray synhyde Elf cloak. Scabbarded Deinonychus served as the tent pole while my obsidian headed spear was the ridge pole.
While walking and inside our shelter, I ran the condenser full time. It operated off of tiny, coin sized, rechargeable solar batteries although the movement of my walking as it perched on my shoulder also provided the minimal power it used to draw moisture from the arid atmosphere.Occasional we would discover a cactus on the east side of a rocky outcrop. If it were not too spiny, I would remove the barbs and we would suck on the flesh. This worked well enough for prickly pears but chollas were another matter. Twice, when chollas were the only plant available, I used my Marine K-Bar knife and hacked the plant into small pieces which I then placed in my collapsible solar still’s pot, while aiming the mirror at the pots side. The resulting water was tasteless and not bountiful but it kept us going and helped rendered palatable the dried rations that sustained us. I gave most of the water to Griffon who required more than I did.
By the evening of the second day the track of the giant squid that we followed entered a pass that wound through a canyon on each side of which was a sandstone escarpment. The trail of human footprints left the sand and disappeared on the smooth stone of the cliff on the left side.
I wondered whether I should follow the sea beast or the human trail I felt certain had been made by Kendra. I looked at the mouth of the canyon dubiously. Its high walls seemed a perfect invitation to an ambush and I thought of Book X of the Odyssey and Polydoros Odysseus’ encounter with the Laestrygonians.
Griffon’s judgment was unclouded and he immediately started to climb the cliff. I soon caught up and we climbed steadily into the evening as the light faded. We spent the night in a shallow cave next the path. We were not the first to use it, judging by the amount of litter, detritus, and old bones, some obviously human, that littered the floor. I pushed as much as I could out of cave to the downhill side of the path, employing my ash shafted spear as a broom. I was careful to touch nothing with my bare flesh and was even more careful not to let anything fall off the face of the cliff. I did not wish to alert anyone or anything of our presence. The litter in the path would serve as a trap or at least an alarm to anyone or thing that had followed us.
We took turns at watch. When the eastern horizon turned gray in the predawn, we had a meager meal and set out climbing as Rhodos Aurora appeared. I wished to put some miles behind us before the sun became too hot although the elevation and the faint breeze made traveling cooler than it had been on the wasteland’s floor.
The sun had not been up an hour when I turn a blind corner and was confronted with the fierce serpent. Nine of the ten most venomous species on the planet are indigenous to Australia. This was an Inland Taipan (Oxyuranus microlepidotus) named “the fierce snake” by the Abos. Its venom is the most toxic of Australian serpata.
Taipans grow to 1 to 2 meters in length. This one was monstrous, more than 4 meters long by its appearance and thicker than my thigh. Its yellow color matched the stone and its back was cross hatched with small black scales. It raised itself to my height, and stared at me with blank, black eyes with pupils so black, they reflected no light.
Though I had been born in the Year of the Snake, one glance from those eyes indicated there was no affinity between us. I wondered, albeit it briefly, how this serpent came to be here. Was I in Australia, or had the vortexes of the space time continuum transported the taipan to the outlands where, either by exposure to radiation or from feeding on irradiated rodents, it had reached this enormous size. The usual laws of nature did not strictly apply in this place.
The taipan’s head was small in comparison to its body, unlike that of viper. It drew it back in preparation to strike when Griffon, who had been following me, moved to my side. The snake, attracted by this new movement, turned its gaze to the Ghost Dog of the North. Griffon returned its stare, his teeth bared, all friendliness gone from his grin. He was still in his mortal form.After a moment, the snake turned a slithered quickly town a narrow defile that was too steep for us to follow although we had no mind to do so.
“Good dog,” I said. The snake people see in spectrums invisible to the human eye. It is said that they can actually see the soul of a being, which accounts for the fact that politicians and insurance executives are rarely bitten.
After the snake disappeared, we continued our climb. I was prudent enough to let Griffon lead the way on this occasion.
TLGK
-
TLGK,
While I have a connection… (sigh)
“Chapter 3: Walking toward the wine dark sea…”
Great story, my friend. I definitely think you have potential to follow the tracks of your great compatriot writer John Grisham.
“By the evening of the second day the track of the giant squid that we followed entered a pass that wound through a canyon on each side of which was a sandstone escarpment. The trail of human footprints left the sand and disappeared on the smooth stone of the cliff on the left side.”
This makes me think: have you read a book titled “The girl of the sea of Cortez“? (sorry if I asked this before). One of the most most enchanting books I read for a long time, and I’m pretty sure the author is American. It’s not a huge book at all, pretty thin paperback actually, but it’s stunning (in my opinion - well, it worked for me). No giant squids in there, but giant manta rays.
Stiletto, if you read this, see if you can find it at a library - you’ll love it. It’s all about “blessed” humans (the girl, in this case) who are more in touch with other species of nature - even frightening looking ones - than most humans can ever hope to be with a cat or a dog.
-
TLGK,
Fine job on the action adventure tale. If Whynot didn’t make an appearance, we would still be pondering if this were a non-fictional tale. I am anticipating the next chapters and wondering when our heroes must fend off the black cloaked, large fanged flying meerkats whose use of the halberd is legendary.
-
Chapter 4: Death in the Afternoon
We reached the top of the escarpment at mid morning, though hot, the temperature was moderated by a breeze from the west that blew in our faces. Nevertheless, we pitched our shelter shortly before midday. I emptied the cache container from the condenser, took a sip, and gave the rest to Griffon. We made a meal of dried fruit and bread, after which I emptied the condenser and distilled more cacti.
We waited for the worst of the heat to abate before setting off again, the sun in our faces. The color of the sky had changed subtly. Though the western sky was white, it was no longer the heated white of the desert. Instead, it was the softer white of humidity. The sea lay ahead but how far away I could not tell.
The landscape began to change gradually. The bare rock gave way to sandy soil which supported a carpet of stunted grass and even a few wind blasted ancient cedars that grew crookedly from clefts in the rocks.
Three hours before sunset, we heard a faint buzz that grew louder as we approached. It seemed to be coming from the other side of a small rise. Griffon and I went into stealth mode. I readied my spear. Griffon walked a few paces in front and three paces to my left as I am right handed.
The buzz grew more cacophonous as we neared the rise. I caught up to Griffon and we approached the top of the rise together. We crawled on our bellies making no noise on the rock that had reasserted itself as we approached the rim. We kept our chins low and just as we reached the lip of the bowl; a breath of wind hit our faces.
The stench that accompanied it staggered me. I drew the edge of my cloak across my nose and mouth. I breathed through my mouth only. I used another fold of the soft inside to wipe my eyes which had begun to tear. Griffon had walked a few paces down the slope and was gagging.
The Ghost Dog had been my companion for many years. He had rolled in more dead things than I care to remember. Griffon was no shrinking violet to the perfume of death, but this was more than even he could bear.
“Griffy,” I instructed, “Go down the slope a few more yards and walk around. I will walk the top of the bowl. There is nothing alive down there and therefore, nothing to fear.”
The buzzing continued apace. It came from millions of flies that feasted on the carrion below. Black clouds of them.Truth to tell I had no wish to explore closer. I picked up a stone the size of a grapefruit and threw it at one of the forms that seemed supine, rather than prone. The stone struck the center with a sound as if it had landed in swamp muck.
The flies rose in an angry cloud and before they alit again I saw what I needed to see. Brown rags from which emerged green and purple flesh. They were mutants who had the misfortune to cross paths with Kendra, evidently.
That they were mutants explained why there were no vultures. The vultures of the Outlands may not be fastidious, but they instinctively avoided dead mutant flesh. The vultures are wise. They know, “You are what you eat.” The flies, on the other hand, were not so fastidious. Of course that would account why so many of them had an extra set of wings or legs or eyes to go with their irradiated chromosomes.
Her reputation was that Kendra hated mutants even more than she despised sand pirates. It was difficult to determine how many mutants had been walking around upright–well more or less upright, after all they were mutants—before Kendra drew her sword. There were multiple lumps of flesh spread over the sandy bottom of the bowl. Some large, some not. How many whole mutants there had been before the carnage began was difficult to determine. Perhaps as many as six, perhaps as few as three.
Although we knew were we following her, Griffon lost her scent, so we headed west. By mid morning the next day we could smell the salt. Soon thereafter we saw the first gulls. Then we reached the edge of the high cliffs overlooking the sea. At the foot of the cliffs was thick palm forest that gradually thinned as it approached the water until it gave way to a wide sandy beach. Fifty yards beyond the water line lay a wide coral reef, broken here and there, but forming a shallow lagoon as far as I could see. The beach was bracketed by rocky headlands about three miles apart. To the south, or left, a line of vivid green, lined the headland, indicating a watercourse so we walked that way.
A sheer cliff blocked direct access to the headland, so we back tracked, finding a path, perhaps made by goats, that led us down to beach from the cliffs which were limestone, the composition of the stone having morphed from sandstone a half day’s journey to the east.
When we reached the north side of the headland, we a saw a small stream of fresh water that emerged from a seep halfway up the face of the cliff. It formed a series of small pools that formed a natural stairway up onto the headland.The south side of the headland was sheer, rendering the position easily defended by Griffon and I. We quenched our thirst, and then bathed in one of the lower pools, washing from our bodies the grit and dust from the interior.
We climbed the headland and found a protected spot to make camp. I send Griffon out to gather wood while went down to lagoon. The area was empty of humans and mutants, I sensed none and Griffon, whose senses are keener than mine, had given no indication that we were anything but alone. I removed my elf boots and singlet. I stuck my kenmuri-otoshi tanto in my belt and carrying my spear and a fine meshed net, walked through the surf that lapped on the shore into the lagoon.
I quickly speared a medium sized grouper. Near the point of the headland I found some arame, and harvested eight or nine stalks. Then, crouched on the rocks, I filleted the grouper, carefully removing the cheeks. Then I flung the offal, skin, and skeleton into the water where it was gratefully received by the lagoon’s scavengers. I then retrieved my boots and clothing and climbed back to the camp site.
Griffon had gathered a considerable amount of dead wood, smallish pieces that he could carry easily in his mouth. I collected enough rocks to form a ring on patch of smooth stone. The site was shaded by a number of coconut palms. I used a short length of rope and my elf boots to climb one of the trees, harvesting a number of coconuts.
I partially filled the pot of the solar still placed some of the jasmine rice I carried in my pack in it. I chopped some of the adame, and place it in the pot w/ the rice. Then I took my K-Bar and removed two of the eyes of one of the coconuts and poured the liquid in with the rice and the seaweed. I placed the pot on its rotating base and then and focused the mirror on its side.
Splintering one of the pieces of wood, I started a smokeless fire as soon as the rice was half done. The soft wood was reduced quickly to coals after which I lay my titanium grill across the stones and grilled the grouper fillets.Then we ate. Griffon was content with the fish fillets and eschewed the rice, probably because it contained seaweed. I was careful to divide the delicate cheeks with him and, all and all, he was content. He went to the closest pool formed by the cascading seep, drank until sated, then walked back to the fire, lay down and fell asleep.
I cleaned the cooking utensils in a lower pool, then walked back to the fire where I sat on a fallen palm log with my back against one of the palm trunks. I faced the sea as the orange orb of the setting sun as it flamed toward the horizon. I split the coconut which I had used to sweeten the rice, and began to separate pieces of the white flesh from the husk. I put a small piece in my mouth and chewed it contentedly. The shadows behind me began to lengthen. Then I heard a soft, sibilant, accented lisp from above me and to my left.
“Senor, Por favor. Could you spare me a piece of fruit?”
-
TLGK,
“Then I heard a soft, sibilant, accented lisp from above me and to my left.”
Who was it? Barb?
-
Chapter 5: Encounter with the giant fruit bat
I rolled forward, somersaulting and spinning toward the voice. I drew, Krait, my tanto , with my left hand from its sheath on my right hip. With my right hand I drew one of my throwing knives from its sheath over the left shoulder of my singlet.
Griffon, awoke and sprang to his feet, looking to the cluster of fronds of the tree next to that against which I had been leaning. His hackles rose and he growled low in his throat.
We looked up and were confronted with an upside down hairy doggy face, fox like, almost cute.
Griffon gave me a sidelong glance, as if to say: “Why is there a winged dog hanging upside down at the top of that tree?” He growled again.
The animal at the top of the tree proceeded to give a series of low, throaty barks, punctuated by a few yips. Griffon’s hackles subsided and after listening to the barks, responded with a few quiet ones of his own. Then he sat down, and with tongue lolling gave me a look that said, “He’s all yours, Loop.”
I looked at the doggie face above me. “So, you speak Retriever?”
“Si, Senor. I speak Retriever, and approximately 2,500 languages. You see, I have a good ear; or ears, I should say.”
“Then you must be Roberto Il Magnifico; Giant Fruit Bat of Guam; Ambassador of Pterodidae; Plenipotentiary Extraordinaire of the Chiroptera. Your reputation has preceded you, sir.” I sheathed my blades.
“You need not introduce yourself, Senor Kid. Even had I not know of your noble companion, the Ghost Dog of the North, I would recognize the master of Deinonychus; the wielder of Krait; the Loop Garoo Kid; half breed son of Pisces and Aquarius; Lord of the lash; Holder of Souls; Avatar of Thoth; Consort of Seshat; First Cousin of Jubal, thrice removed; Cowboy in the Boat of Ra; wanted for mayhem in the City and County of Denver, inter alia.”
I placed my hands together, fingers extended, thumbs up, in the Buddhist “two hands for heaven” gesture while bowing my head slightly. “The poets always exaggerate. That’s their job.”
“Senor Kid, por favor. I have not eaten since I was transported to these barren outlands. Is it possible that you would have a spare piece of fruit? I am, after all, a frugavore.”
“Legend,” I said, “Holds that you are immortal.”
Si, senor. But the truth is that I am only immortal in the sense that I cannot die by natural causes. I can be killed and if I do no feed, I suffer hunger and thirst even as you and your noble companion.”
“In fact, I have some dried apricots and a few figs, perhaps,” I replied.
A pained expression flitted across the doggie face. “Senor Kid, I do not wish to see ungrateful or finicky but I am a giant fruit bat. Not a giant dried fruit bat.”
“Of course, of course,” I apologized, “Would you prefer some coconut nectar?”
A little toothy smile flitted across Roberto’s mouth. “Coconut nectar is food for the Gods. A primary ingredient in pina coladas, my favorite cocktail.”
I pulled the K-Bar from its sheaf in my belt behind my back. I took one of the coconuts I had harvested, and split it in half, losing only a few drops of the sweet liquid. Then I placed both halves on a level ledge of the limestone cliff.
The giant bat, let go of the palm tree, rotated 180 degrees so that he was head up, and broke his fall by extending his wings a few feet above the ground. Then he hopped and walked over to the ledge. When he reached the split coconut, he extended a long tongue, twisted it into a tube and began to draw the nectar into his mouth.
As the slurping began, Griffon looked at me, his grin even more goofy than was typical.
-
TLGK,
“When he reached the split coconut, he extended a long tongue, twisted it into a tube and began to draw the nectar into his mouth.”
Coconut milkshake/smoothie?
What’s Griffon’s problem? Never seen fruit bats before? Sydney’s bats are more plentiful than doggies. They have the advantage over doggies in that they don’t shit on the sidewalk. They don’t hang off palm trees though, but off fruit trees whose branches are only 2 or 3 meters above ground. They are quite large, their bodies being the size of a domestic cat or nearly.
Reminds me of a really sad Billie Holiday song about “strange fruits hanging off trees”. I don’t suppose I need to tell you or anyone else what kind of fruits they were.
-
TLGK,
““In fact, I have some dried apricots and a few figs, perhaps,” I replied.
A pained expression flitted across the doggie face. “Senor Kid, I do not wish to see ungrateful or finicky but I am a giant fruit bat. Not a giant dried fruit bat.””Lolll, but even that is better than a giant fruit dried bat, yes? WhyNot told me once there are plenty of fruit bats in Sydney. I have never seen real ones, but I have seen documentaries. There is one where they go in a cave, and there must be millions of bats, all holding to the walls and roof.
I don’t remember what country it was in. But they didn’t look giant. I think bats look cute. They seem like a mixture between a bird and a mammal.
And I remember that the people exploring the cave said there was bat shit several centimenters of thickness on the ground of the cave.
-
WhyNot,
“Reminds me of a really sad Billie Holiday song about “strange fruits hanging off trees”. I don’t suppose I need to tell you or anyone else what kind of fruits they were.”
I know the fruits that you talk about because you told me the story once. Maybe it is lucky that I didn’t live in America in those days because I would kill all those white assholes and I would find myself hanging off a tree too.
-
Stiletto,
“but even that is better than a giant fruit dried bat, yes?”
LOL, already I don’t like dried fruits much, but a giant dried bat… beurkkk!!!
“And I remember that the people exploring the cave said there was bat shit several centimenters of thickness on the ground of the cave.”
Beurkkk again!
TLGK,
You are a wonderful story teller. Is this story from you imagination or did you read it somewhere?
-
Stiletto,
“Maybe it is lucky that I didn’t live in America in those days because I would kill all those white assholes and I would find myself hanging off a tree too.”
Nah, they only hung black dudes and dudettes. White ones could get away with murder and they would even be praised for it. Then again… a Ruskie dudette… not sure what the sentence would be for her… hung drawn and quartered?
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Whynot,
“hung drawn and quartered?”
What does it mean?
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Valérie,
““hung drawn and quartered?”
What does it mean?”
Mmmm, don’t tell me you skipped every history class at high school! What were you doing, eh, hanky pankying around shamelessly?
I heard it from the grapevine that our resident historian Mr Pee is preparing a cunning master plan to unveil things about history you would faint just imagining.
In particular, there is that amazing story about a mamooth-size clitoris discovered by the SQUAT teams of Ohio, guess where, under Barb’s ginourmous triple layered and yoghourt-filled camping bed.
How does that grab you?
-
Valérie,
http://www.wired.com/images/article/full/2007/10/torture_580x.jpg
The illustration will clearly explain drawn and quartered. To visualize hung, drawn and quartered, one only has to add one more horse and rope to the illustration.
Whynot,
Are you sure this wasn’t a mammoth’s ass flap? Of course it is well known that SQUAT is on the cutting edge of technology, but is science as advanced as to identify between 2 specimens that are virtually identical?
-
Valerie,
Mr. P is mostly right. If you wish, watch the end of the film “Braveheart” starring Mel Gibson. This from Wikipedia:
In Egland, until reformed under the Treason Act 1814, the full punishment for the crime of treason was to be hanged, drawn and quartered in that the condemned prisoner would be:
1. Dragged on a hurdle (a wooden frame) to the place of execution. This is one possible meaning of drawn.
2. Hanged by the neck for a short time or until almost dead (hanged).
3. Disembowelled and emasculated and the genitalia and entrails burned before the condemned’s eyes,
4. The body beheaded, then divided into four parts (quartered).A bientot.
Railroad Bill
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Railroad and Mr P,
I think your are both trying to be even more grosser than your normal state, and that’s very gross already, especially you Mr P.
But I can’t help laughing. I am imagining Sarkozy being hang drawn and quartered. But I think they would need one more horse to pull his little penis out. Maybe I think a fruit bat would be strong enough.
I am not good with doing drawings myself, if you remember the bad drawing of Snail Mail post, but I am looking at pictures that look interesting
-
Hi Stiletto/WhyNot,
I would like to post a photo but don’t know how.
Rory
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Howdy Rory,
You can’t post a photo directly yourself (it’s not MY decision, it’s the way WordPress is designed: only people with “admin” status can do it), but here is the way around:
1. email me the photo (whynot@elektric-kat.com).
2. Write your comment, and within it, where you want the photo inserted, put a line saying “please insert pic here”.Stiletto could do it just the same since she’s got “admin” status on PP, but unfortunately, I can’t reveal her email address.
-
Rory,
PS: if you make the “subject” line of your email to me “[PP]” (square brackets, without the quotes), she will received the email too (I have a “rule” in my Outlook to forward any email titled such to her). Sorry about the painful workarounds, but Stiletto is still an illegal immigrant here in France, and I certainly don’t want her to get busted.
-
Will the real Paul McCartney please stand up?
Rory
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UU/Rory,
Sorry but I don’t see anything in my email box about an attached picture from you.
-
Rory,
PS: Maybe we should try to sort this out via email. Mine is whynot@elektric-kat.com
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WhyNot,
Oh I sent it to your address, it was in my sent mail box with no error reported. I just forwarded again to your mail with a subject of []
(I forgot the PP) , if still no sign of it I will send again tomorrow . My email provider is often down for maintenance at this time of day.Rory
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Oh wait… I just found 2 emails from you in my “junk mail” folders, lol. Let me look.
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Rory (Urban… is too long to type),
Paul is one of the Beatles, yes? It must be the one in the middle.
Who is Bill Shepa? He looks like Hitler or a serial killer, lol.
-
Rory,
Also, tell me: why do you call yourself “urban underclass”?
-
Stiletto,
They are allegedly all Paul!
The first one is Paul from the Beatles 1966 “Yesterday and Today” album cover.
The second one is Paul(?) from the 1967 “Sargent Pepper’s Loneiy Hearts Club Band” Album inner sleeve.
The third one is meant to be Paul(?) in disguise from the 1968 “White Album” poster.There is a funny and interesting conspiracy theory that Paul MacCartney died in late 1966 and was replaced by a doppleganger Billy Sheares or Billy Shearton, various names are bandied about. If the theory is true then Number One, Paul 1966 is the REAL Paul MacCartney!
Therefore he current man known as Sir Paul MacCartney is an imposter.
You should Google “Paul MaCartney is dead” when you are bored some of the ‘clues’ to the theory are very compelling, some are very funny.
I call myself Urban_Underclass because that is what I am, poor and mentally ill and proud to be a member of the underclass (the unemployed, unemployable, disabled, homeless, criminalized, criminal) I have been all of these things at one time or another and most of my friends and associates fall into this category too. As a card carrying member of the Scailist Worker’s Party and a street politician and agitator I also feel that I sometimes represent this underclass. But you can please call me Rory
Rory
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Rory,
Ok, thank you for all the strange theories about Paul. It sounds like it is nearly as bad in England as in Russia. Maybe there will be a Paul Fucking Putin soon?
I like the Beatles music, but only for a little while. I like better funk and fusion music. It is whyNot’s fault because he indoctrinated me, lol.
“I call myself Urban_Underclass because that is what I am, poor and mentally ill and proud to be a member of the underclass (the unemployed, unemployable, disabled, homeless, criminalized, criminal) I have been all of these things at one time or another and most of my friends and associates fall into this category too.”
Lol, this is funny because people have harrassed WhyNot and telling him he is a “commie bastard”. I don’t think he is mentally ill, and it is sure that his dick is not ill because he always wants to fuck, lol.
And from what I read I don’t think you are mentally ill either, but very much the contrary.
-
Stiletto,
I suffer from Bi-Polar Disorder which is a Moderately serious mental illness. My moods range from suicidally depressed to so elated that I risk becoming delusional. The illness is not severe but did cause me to have to give up work 3 years ago. It also causes me to get in trouble with the law from time to time.
I take 2 medications which help control the extremity of the highs and lows. I also attend a psychiatrist every 8-12 weeks and do some group therapy. The illness is manageable, but means I am forced to be self-employed and have to be very careful about using intoxicating substances, which is sad, I used to like getting intoxicated, but there is a risk of becoming psychotic (which has happened in the past) and I have found through bitter experience that the risk is not worth taking.
I don’t mind though, I have a nice home, usually eat quite well, I have good friends and a lovely little dog.
Rory
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UU,
“I suffer from Bi-Polar Disorder …”
I know all about that, my friend, and I highly sympathize: my last spouse (the American one) had the same ailment. She was on tons of medicine here in France cuz it was free. Most of the time, it seemed to work reasonably well, certainly helped compared to when I met her in the States and after only 2 days of shacking together, she threw a fit and smashed a printer against the wall.
She never drank any alcohol while we lived together, but I don’t think it was because of her illness - more to do with horrendous memories of a very violent drunkard father.
Stiletto,
“I don’t think he is mentally ill, and it is sure that his dick is not ill because he always wants to fuck, lol”
Thank you honey bun. There is some truth in what you say, although it is somewhat simplified. But I can promise you that when we meet at last in the flesh, I’ll do your pussy justice.
-
WhyNot,
Really the worst part about BiPolar (once like me you have found a stable lifestyle and medication that works) is being unpredictable. Right now I am pretty elated so I am happy, active, sociable and yet for 3 weeks before the 26th of this month I was deeply depressed, all I wanted to do was nothing. People who don’t know me so well sometimes think I have taken a dislike to them or am being rude and stand-off-ish, but it is just that i am almost catatonic.
I live alone (with a dog), I would not inflict my mood swings on anyone. I have lived with 2 women before for a few years with each, but it just was too hard for them. I accept this now, if a woman wants a relationship with me they have to accept that we live apart otherwise the relationship will fail and probably in an unpleasant way.
Rory
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Rory/UU,
“Really the worst part about BiPolar (once like me you have found a stable lifestyle and medication that works) is being unpredictable. Right now I am pretty elated so I am happy, active, sociable and yet for 3 weeks before the 26th of this month I was deeply depressed, all I wanted to do was nothing. People who don’t know me so well sometimes think I have taken a dislike to them or am being rude and stand-off-ish, but it is just that i am almost catatonic.”
I understand you totally, and yet… if I may put my 2 cents:
My marriage with Dianne lasted 10 years. At the beginning, I thought I had married a complete nutcase, but since I was stuck in the US, I had little choice but do with it.
In the early days, it was a mixture of complete elation in the good times and sheer dismay watching her going bananas at regular intervals. Again, it is only because I was “stuck” there in the US that I battled on nevertheless.
When we moved to France things improved; partly because I had become used to her “attacks of madness” and had learned to “let them go and wait for them to die out”; partly because I had invested so much in making a new life at the other end of the world with a new woman, leaving behind me a very comfy lifestyle in Oz.
Also, again, near free medication and medical care in France meant that the “extreme” outbreaks of her mental condition were very subdued (compared to what she was like in the US).
-
WhyNot,
Your story sounds all to familiar, I know several bi-polar people, maybe I will be lucky some day and meet a woman who is broad minded and loving and tolerant as you obviously are. Of course a bi-polar male like myself, is probably much more frightening for a female partner.
While I have never committed a violent act in my adult life, I can be extremely frightening when I am angry and insane.
Rory
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WhyNot,
Luckily there is some vestige of socialism in the Irish system so I enjoy the benefits of virtually free medication and doctor care.
The silly thing is if I was in full-time employment and earning less than €100 more a week than I get in sickness benefit (which is about as much as I could expect to earn in the current economic climate), I would have to pay almost in full for my medication and doctor.
It is a major disincentive to work!
Rory
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Stiletto,
To go back to the Paul MacCartney conspiracy theory for while. A funny and bizarre version of the theory is here:
http://digilander.libero.it/p_truth/index.html
But funnier still are all the hidden messages people find playing Beatles songs backwards! There are a lot of them on YouTube
Rory
-
Personally I think Paul died around the end of March 1966, because I was born at the start of 1967, and I believe (as I am a good looking left-handed musical genius) that I am he
as in his re-incarnation, so allowing for the 9 months I spent in my mammy’s tummy, Paul must have died in March ‘66, most theorist believe it was later in that year.Rory
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T-Rex,
This is me, standing on a boulder in the middle of a stream, meditating during my daily two hour Kung Fu practice.
But my meditation was not serene! I heard from Rory that are still around acting tough!
I’m going to chew your ass good T-Rex!
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy dog
-
Rowdy dog,
“I’m going to chew your ass good T-Rex!”
Chew “MY” ass??? You mean… “YOU” puny malformed imitation of a doggie-woggie??? BWHAHAHAHA!!! ROFLACO (Rolling On Floor All Claws Out)
Let me sharpen my claws on the nearest tree and let’s go for a doggie-woggie ride. Don’t worry about smashing into a tree, I’ll dig my claws into your ears and use them as reins to guide ya - I know you doggie-woggies are inherently fucking stupid. When I’ve had enough I’ll ride your ugly mug and smash it into the same boulder you’re now standing on.
Like the itinerary?
-
T-Rex,
There’s only one good thing about a cat like you, that’s your nice furry coat. I’m going to make a sleeping bag out of you you motherfucker! Then I’m going to masturbate in it every fucking night.
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog
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Yogi,
“Then I’m going to masturbate in it every fucking night.”
Just goes to show, ya wanker doggie-woggie: you’re such an ugly mut, there ain’t one fucking bitch on the horizon willing to let you come sniff her pussy.
Besides, I know all about you dogs, whenever you meet another doggie, the first thing you do is sniff the asshole good and proper. S’like yer thinking “wow, don’t it smell good!!! I wish my asshole smelled just like yours! I’m IN LOVE!!!! I got the horn! Mind if I start humping in there?”.
-
T-Rex,
To get a Freudian for a moment. Maybe you are so uptight because you need a shag.
I suppose you think your too good for every bitch cat you meet. I bet your in love with yourself. We dogs know how to have a good time.You must have been a total shit in your past life to have been re-incarnated as a pussy cat.
Do yourself a favor and kill yourself, before I do it for you…slowly and painfully,
You might get lucky and come back as a smelly billy-goat,Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog
-
T-Rex and Rowdy Dog,
LOLLLLLLLLLL, you animals are crazy! Mr Peee, we need some more drawings!
-
Vale´rie,
Yogi’s asleep now thank God. He got overstimulated by all is christmas treats and had an out-break of rowdyness. He sure don’t like cats though, he is well camouflaged in the photo don’t you think?
I hope you are well and have a happy new year
Rory
-
I’m going to be a party pooper and tell you these supposed conversations between super dog and T-Rex are boring.
I have a 19 year old cat who is a sweetheart and has been all his life. He wouldn’t hurt a flea and is a lover and not a fighter. I’ve seen him gang up with one of our deceased cats and toss a mouse around playing until it was dead and then bring it to us as though it was the best gift he could give.
I have two dogs and have probably had at least ten dogs in my adult life. I always had a dog when I was a child. I love the canine species as much as the feline species and I don’t have dogs that are braggarts. They are secure in the love we give them and in the unconditional love they give us.
Both species are special; cats usually a little more independent because they haven’t been as domesticated as dogs. Most cats only want to be loved when they want to be loved. My little Smudge has always been a cat that loves to be picked up and petted and loved. I even had one cat who loved to have his belly rubbed and that’s unusual for a cat.
Stop fighting like cats and dogs and come up with real conversation. At least that’s my opinion for what it’s worth.
Happy New Year from our house to yours and from our feline and canines to your felines and canines.
-
Jeanette,
In Ireland we have this tradition of minding out own business.
Rory
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Hey Yogi,
Did you read Jeanette’s speech? I think this calls for drastic retaliation. What do you suggest? Get a load of this:
“I have a 19 year old cat who is a sweetheart and has been all his life. He wouldn’t hurt a flea and is a lover and not a fighter. I’ve seen him gang up with one of our deceased cats and toss a mouse around playing until it was dead and then bring it to us as though it was the best gift he could give.”
The little fucker is a “sweetheart that wouldn’t hurt a flea” and yet gangs up like a coward with other cats to torture a mouse to death! What’s more, the little bastard is so proud of it he brings the butchered mouse back to Jeanette like it was a grand Oscar trophy!
I’m gonna write to Amnesty International about this!!!
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T-Rex,
For once I’m with you, I’m not gonna put up with shit from no one. Two cats against one lousy mouse. Thats just typical Americans, probably called it operation rodent thunder, or rodent storm.
I think you and I would have a good figth together, but I wouldn’t demean myself by fighting a mouse.
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog
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Jeanette,
Are you not the woman I remember in the Summer posted a videoon YouTube explaining why you were not going to visit this blog anymore?
Rory
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Rory,
For once I’m with you, I’m not gonna put up with shit from no one. Two cats against one lousy mouse. Thats just typical Americans, probably called it operation rodent thunder, or rodent storm.
Lousy mouse? I was attacked by a mouse once before. I had to smash his head with a hammer, but it was self defense.
Typical Americans? Do tell what the word on the street is about us. Are we all what you see on MTV?
Jeanette,
You have stormed off of this blog so many times and vowed never to come back because of your god. Now, here you are once again and insulting these jackoffs like the rhetoric is not up to par for your amusement?
Fuck you.
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Rowdy Dog,
“Thats just typical Americans, probably called it operation rodent thunder, or rodent storm.”
LOLLLLLLLLL, I’m going to pee again, LOLLLLL
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Mr Pee!!!
“I was attacked by a mouse once before. I had to smash his head with a hammer, but it was self defense.”
LOLLLL, how did the mouse attack you?
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Mr P,
“You have stormed off of this blog so many times and vowed never to come back because of your god. Now, here you are once again and insulting these jackoffs like the rhetoric is not up to par for your amusement?
Fuck you.”Now now, Mr P, I have to intercede in favor of Jeanette whom I have on line and is very upset. Yes, I agree, she can be frustrating at times, but she really is a kind-hearted lady - trust me, we chat nearly every day. It’s just that at times she can’t help herself, and she is a bit touchy about 4-fucking-letter words.
Now will youse 2 kiss and make up?
-
Maybe Madame Jeanette should have her very own special post…
That could be very interesting, don’t you think, in the spirit of tolerance which illuminates her life.
I don’t know why, but the very thought gives me the willies, like starched and ironed underwear.
But hey, some of us are born exhibitionists. I get a thrill lately by repeatedly going through those full body scanners they are putting in the airports after reading a good juicy porno novel.You can’t keep a good man down. Happy 2010 everyone!
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Mr P,
“Typical Americans”
Yogi, who is very upset and but I think he was referring to the American government’s approach to international relations. Yogi’s a young dog and has never left County Wexford, let alone gone on intercontinental adventures.
As for myself, I’ve been to Texas once and thoroughly enjoy myself, I have some good American friends on-line but am also no admirer of the U.S as a player on the international stage, please tell me what there is to admire?
Here are my two major issues with the US as at the moment.
Climate change.
Palestinian rights.Rory
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Jeanette,
Yogi is a northern fell terrier, his mother was a pure Patterdale, they are bread for hunting, they are one of the bravest and most aggressive dogs known to man.
He will try to kill anything that is reasonably small and not his species. This means , for example when I go to my parents, their ducks and chickens have to be locked in and the cats head for the hills until he is gone.
This is not a personality disorder it is just the way he is, his mother was used for badger baiting, not something a approve of. A Badger would probably have 2 to 3 times the body weight of a Patterdale terrier. If you can’t take a joke you should not have butted in when yogi and T-Rex were playing the dozens.
Rory
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UU,
“He will try to kill anything that is reasonably small and not his species. ”
I can relate to this totally. I’ve been caught in the act killing entire colonies of cat biscuits. Not only killing the lil cunts but eating them as well! Sometimes I eat them live too.
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UU,
“but am also no admirer of the U.S as a player on the international stage, please tell me what there is to admire?”
errrr errr, what about Britney Spears’ titties? Or Mrs Paris Hilton’s very own pussy, huh?
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Rory, what you said had no effect on me. I value Mr. P’s opinion and in the past he has always been very gracious. To see him use the last two words: F You surprised and hurt me because I thought he was a neutral if not a friend. I have, in the past, spoken to him on Skype and found him to be a very nice man.
I said I would probably come across as a party pooper before I even made my comment. Chalk it up to being up very late talking to WhyNot and to getting up very early for appointments. I apologize for offending anyone with my previous comment.
I have never had the desire to go to the Emerald Isle, but my in-laws went there several times to County Cork to look up my father in law’s roots. They seemed to like it.
If you don’t like the United States or her government or people that’s your problem and not mine. Out of curiosity, where is Ireland on the international stage? Does that mean we should all hate Irishmen? Heck, no. I married one!
If you went to Texas you saw one of our largest states and probably met some very hospitable people. Too bad you couldn’t have visited every state. Maybe then your opinion of Americans would be higher. We elect the government, but we don’t run it. If we don’t like them, as the saying goes, “We throw the bums out” and get new bums!
There are many places in the world I would love to visit. France is one of them. Moscow, Egypt, and Israel are others. Italy and Spain wouldn’t be bad either. But, for my money, I would not want to live anywhere but the United States with all its warts and all.
We provide mosquito nets to help prevent malaria in countries where it is a problem. We have provided untold billions in aid to AIDS patients to make their lives last a bit longer; hopefully until a cure is found. When there is a natural disaster our ships are there to take in supplies and provide medical assistance, to say nothing of what the private citizens do in the way of donations to help those less fortunate than ourselves.
We, or most of us I think, do not take our blessings for granted. We know we live in a bountiful country and we share that bounty with the world and get the kind of response you give.
Microdot, you talk of me having my own post. Don’t worry about that as I don’t need one.
And, Rory, I’m not insulting you, but I have never heard of the breed of dog you have or of the derivatives from which the breed came. I’m sure he’s cute and smart, but I wouldn’t want a vicious dog as a pet. Dogs can be trained not to chase the chickens or other farm animals if the owner wants to do so. I would say to keep him away from my German Shepherd or he definitely will have met his match, with her arthritis and all.
Happy New Year, everyone, and may this be the year we find some sort of peace in the world.
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Mr. P,
If this doesn’t insult you please consider this to be my big kiss to you and a request to be your friend or at least for us to both be as polite to one another as we have been in the past.
Happy New Year!
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Jeanette,
“We know we live in a bountiful country and we share that bounty with the world”
I think I’m gonna puke the doggie I just ate.
-
On a more exciting note…
We had some fireworks in our little town an hour ago. They woke me up from my beauty sleep cat nap.
I rushed outside to take a look, hoping they had blown up the ugly-as-shit church right opposite my den, but alas, the thing’s still standing up.
We might have to call on our good friends, good ole’ US of A and their relentless charity giving (which by the way puts them 17th in the list of countries giving foreign aid), and get them to drop a couple of spectacular atomic bomb fireworks on that recalcitrant church.
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T-Rex,
“I’m gonna puke the doggie I just ate.”
LOLLLLLLL, which doggie is it? Not Rowdy Dog????
“and get them to drop a couple of spectacular atomic bomb fireworks on that recalcitrant church.”
LOLLL, but we must be sure that they don’t atomic bomb Notre Dame de Paris because I go there often and I don’t want to die blown up.
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T-Rex,
“We might have to call on our good friends, good ole’ US of A and their relentless charity giving (which by the way puts them 17th in the list of countries giving foreign aid), and get them to drop a couple of spectacular atomic bomb fireworks on that recalcitrant church. “
But of course, I’ll contact one of those bible thumping senators straight away, because of course they let loose the “charity” money as long as a very large percentage of it is to be spent on military hardware made right here in the good ol u s of a. Now you be a good kitty and go replace the cross with a crescent and no problem, the bombers’ll be on their way in no time,
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Ps,
Happy New Year, Y’all
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Nunya, my darling mademoiselle Grenouille,
Long time no humping your very comely derrière!
“Now you be a good kitty and go replace the cross with a crescent and no problem, the bombers’ll be on their way in no time”
Egad, don’t you give T-Rex bad ideas. The goddam church is only 100 meters away from the hole in which I live. Come to think of it, 2 years ago I lived in another little town where the fucking church was only 30 meters from my apartment (right across the street).
Must be a sign. I mean, why do I end up living in apartments right opposite the fucking church? Maybe the big Dog in the sky wants me to stop fornicating and become a monk? Or a priest? Brother “Priest/monk fucking WhyNot”… But wait, that means I’d have to stop fornicating with grenouilles and start sodomizing human boys. Yucky poo!
Sooo… any fireworks yet in San Diego?
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Nunya,
“Now you be a good kitty and go replace the cross with a crescent and no problem, the bombers’ll be on their way in no time”
LOLLL
Whynot,
“But wait, that means I’d have to stop fornicating with grenouilles and start sodomizing human boys. Yucky poo!”
LOLLLL, then maybe you’ll become archbishop, or cardinal, or even pope? “Pope Whynot”!
Did you see the fireworks in Paris on television? I was there and it was wonderful. Except that I thought they had put too many fireworks and the Eiffel tower was going to explode, and it’s not good because it is too close to me!
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Jeanette,
“Dogs can be trained not to chase the chickens or other farm animals if the owner wants to do so. I would say to keep him away from my German Shepherd or he definitely will have met his match, with her arthritis and all.”
Humans can be trained to stop killing civilians with drones, B-52s and cruise missiles if their masters want to do so.
I promise you, no fucking nazi dogs walk down MY street without my say so.
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog
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Jeanette,
Ireland give a relatively high proportion of it’s GDP to aid for less developed countries. Not enough in my opinion but more in proportion than most developed countries. Currently we have UN peace keepers in the Darfur region of Chad, before that the Lebanon, Congo.
We are (or at least before Iraq War II, where we helped the US by letting their military and fucking CIA use our airport in Shannon as a stopover and for special rendition flights), we are generally seen as honest brokers in international disputes due to our traditional neutrality.
Do you know what Google is, you could always Google ‘Patterdale Terrier’ before wading in with your know it all attitude.
Rory
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All,
Here are two fine examples of my breed, the first handsome devil must be a close relation of mine, the second is what an angry Patterdale Terrier looks like! The Patterdale is a refinement of the traditional northern english fell terrier, from the village of Patterdale in the Lake District. We were only recognized as a breed in 1959, so we are all close relatives.
Now T-Rex, do you still want a fight?
Jeanette, lock up your Chickens, Alsatians lock up your daughters and run for your life!Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog
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Rowdy dog,
I had to battle a little to get your pictures in, but I managed. (WhyNot, what is happening with FTP access to PP? I spent 1/2 hour to make it work)
The first dog looks cute. The second one looks like Putin when he makes speeches in Russia. I think he needs medical attention, especially a new head. Mr Pee is very talented surgeon who makes new head for people with ugly ones.
“Jeanette, lock up your Chickens, Alsatians lock up your daughters and run for your life!”
Lolll. My Rex is German shepherd, he is very good and protective, but I don’t know what he would do if he saw something this frigthening looking. Normally, he never has to do anything because when my customers see him, they behave straight away, and also I always look in the round hole in the door before I leave someone to come in.
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Rowdy dog,
“Humans can be trained to stop killing civilians with drones, B-52s and cruise missiles if their masters want to do so.”
Yes, Americans are very gifted in this and Jeanette must be so proud. I wrote an article last year, and I used WhyNot’s T-Rex as a picture, when he was a little baby cat looking so helpless and with big eyes opening on this new world for him.
And I said something like “why do humans want more fucking babies? All humans do, mostly, is they fuck everything up, kill people to make themselves more wealthy, drop atomic bombs and so on.”
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Stiletto,
Yeah, yeah. Humans also write poetry; compose symphonies; paint paintings; and discover vaccines for deadly diseases. Remember that if you were not human, you could neither have written your last post; read the ones that inspired it; or transmitted it to readers on several different continents.
Happy New Year,
Railroad Bill
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Railroad Bill,
TLGK, why do you have to hide with a nickname to tell your bullshit? Is it because you are a lawyer or because you are an American coward?
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Ok folks, I know I’m late but I have an excuse: my internet connection has been the pits. Still, while it works…
HAPPY NEW FUCKING YEAR, everybody. And a special thanks and good wish for my cutie darling Stiletto for taking care of PP.
PS: TLGK and anyone else: while it is fun and healthy to use pretend identities, remember that WordPress, especially when combined with a few powerful plugins, is no lame blogging system à la Blogger/Blogspot. Whoever writes whatever, a Wordpress admin can find out who you are.
Now, guess what? Siletto has admin status on PP, just like me.
TLGK,
“Humans also write poetry; compose symphonies; paint paintings; and discover vaccines for deadly diseases. Remember that if you were not human, you could neither have written your last post; read the ones that inspired it; or transmitted it to readers on several different continents.”
True. However, in the overal scheme of things, I challenge you to prove to me that humans’ intellectual superiority over other species have done more good than bad to this planet and the species living on it (including humans themselves).
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Stiletto,
Yogi is asleep, but I am sure he is greatful for your work putting up his pictures
He really does stop Alsatians and other big dogs and their owners walking down our narrow little street. He’s got a nasty aggressive streak. Very nice to people of course, because they give him food and treats. He looks more like the first dog, colour wise, but he can pull pretty scary faces like the second one. I’ve had two complaints about his ‘viciousness’ in the last month or so. He has never bitten a person, and no dog has yet called his bluff, but there is one black cocker spaniel who would love to ‘get it on’ with Yogi, but he is always on a lead.I see him as a real cute little dog, so I forget that some people are afraid of dogs. I have to restrict his freedom to roam around town on his own. (I’m so lucky I live right in the middle of town and our town is famous for its narrow streets (made by vikings 1000 years ago), so on the few that are not pedestrianized the traffic moves very slow. Yogi is a minor celebrity in our town. He got many more Christmas presents than me.
But I love him so much, I have to be careful not to give the dog warden an excuse to take him away.
I hope you have a nice year in 2010, and again, thanks for your work on this wonderful blog.
Rory
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WhyNot,
Why don’t you see if Anna can upgrade you to the latest version of WordPress? You don’t have to FTP anything to the site, as it already has a place to browse the computer and upload and post for you. You can even tell it the size. Also works for YouTube where you have to just use the URL of the video, and it works for music.
It would make it a lot easier on Stiletto while she’s minding the blog and I think you’d both enjoy it more.
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PS I usually save my photos to the desktop so I don’t have to remember where I put them and just upload them in WordPress from there.
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Jeanette,
“Why don’t you see if Anna can upgrade you to the latest version of WordPress?”
I don’t have regular contact with Anna - in fact I haven’t talked/chatted with her for over a year. I don’t even know if she is still in Malaysia or back home in Moscow.
Besides, considering she designed this entire blog and didn’t want one single cent in payment for it (months of work), I’d feel like a piece of shit asking her to do more work for me for nothing (since I’m not in a financial position to pay her anything).
Still, thanks for reminding me of her, as I’ve been slack in this respect; I’ll try my best to contact her and wish her a happy new year. She is one very special young woman.
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Hey Rory and Rowdy dog…do you guys have any opinion regarding the Irish anti-blasphemy laws that went into effect on January 1?
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Microdoot,
Funny you should mention that, I think it’s shit. A major step back into the dark and dreary days in Ireland when the Roman Church called the shots and the government danced to their tune. Meanwhile any kid unfortunate enough to be put into the ‘care’ of the state stood a fair chance of getting battered every day and periodically raped by a priest, brother or a nun.
My latest Blog of Blogs post is about it:
http://graycrowblogofblogs.blogspot.com
Regards,
Rory
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Yeah, I totally agree with you and I will check out your blog, but you know what? I think he law is going to go down in its own flaming hypocrisy, especially after all of the shit that has happened with the scandals with the church this year.
You probably have this link already for the 25 blasphemous statements that the Irish Atheists have put up on the web:http://blasphemy.ie/2010/01/01/atheist-ireland-publishes-25-blasphemous-quotes/
Hey is this joke balsphemous under the new law?
A young novice nun walks into the old Mother Superior nuns room crying her eyes out. The kinbdkly Mother superior says, “Now, now, Sister Corine, nothing is that bad and it will help to tell me what the problem is.”
The young nun sobs louder, her face red, “Oh Mother, I’m so embarrassed! I think I have done something foolish and committed a terrible sin!”
The Mother Superior says,”Now, nothing is that terrible that the lord can’t forgive it, but you must tell me.”
The young nun sobs and thinks, then says”Well, Mother, you know old Father Mulchahey?” The old nun looks up with a hint of alarm, “Yes dear, go on, Father Mulchahey, you wre saying?”
“Yes, Father Mulchahey…he, he…sob…he came to me in my room last month and told me he could show me the key to unlock the gates of heaven…oh sobb…” the young nun paused unable to continue…
“Go on, dear,” the old nun said, “I’m listening. What did he do?”
“Well, he opened the front of his cassock and showed me his key and then he uhhh, put it in my lock…and it was…oh mother, I’m so embarrassed…it was Wonderful! We did it again and again every night for the last 3 weeks!” The young nun collapsed in tears and then moaned, “Hopw can god ever forgive me?”
The old nun turned dark with rage and blurted out, “Why, the old goat told me that it was the horn of gabriel and I had to blow it so we could wake the dead!”Is that blasphemy, would I have to pay the 25,000 Euro fine?
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Microdot, Rory,
“do you guys have any opinion regarding the Irish anti-blasphemy laws that went into effect on January 1?
…
…
…
…
Ooops sorry ’bout that, I was busting to take a dump. Huge smelly one too, it was. Thank goodness I had a bible handy to wipe my ass with.Now, what jesus fucking christ anti fucking blasphemy law is that? Does it mean I’m no longer allowed to sodomize jesus statues in church?
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WhYNot, Microdot,
To be honest I havn’t got a clue what constitutes blasphemy. I read Rushdies The Satanic Verses when it came out and could not see why all the nutbags in Iran got so irate.
I recently published a song called Gold Plated Jesus which pokes fun at christianity, islam, the kkk, rastifarians and I ain’t got no €25K, I could do time, and I’m way to pretty to do time.
Rory
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Sorry that last link didn’t work. B.T.W Dan Brown was right, Jesus fucked Mary Magdalene and he used to let John the Evangelist bugger him. John the Baptist fucked them all, he baptized them with love juice. He Jesus and Mary M had proper dirty threesomes. It’s all in the recently discovered gospel according to Larry Flynt.
Rory
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Microdot,
I didn’t find your joke really funny, because things like this really did happen. Irish people as recently as the 1960 were shockingly ignorant of the basic facts of life. There was no sex education in school, kids were just told that if they had impure thought to run to the confession box and give the priest a little wanking material, as for touching yourself down their, french kissing, thinking dirty thought about your good looking older cousin, that was ao ne way ticket to hell, or at least, if you caught God on good day, maybe 10,000,000 years in purgatory.
Rory
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Rory,
“Irish people as recently as the 1960 were shockingly ignorant of the basic facts of life. There was no sex education in school,…“.
Don’t feel singled out; I did all my secondary school studies in France, and right to the last year, in 1973, I never had one single sex education class. That is, “official” ones in the syllabus. All the more ironical because it was a “mixed” (boys and girls) school (actually, thinking back of it, all public schools in France were “mixed”).
So you can imagine the psychological mess: boys reach puberty around 12, girls a little later, and for years and years they are mixing every day for hours, torn by their curiosity and sexual drive and yet are supposed to pretend it doesn’t exist.
Luckily “parallel” education (the type you hear from the grapevine) was rampant. The result is there was of course much hankying pankying around, which makes that official “head in the sand” attitude all the more pathetic because we kids had no idea about STDs, and hardly any idea about condoms, risks of pregancy, etc etc. AIDS wasn’t around at that time, thank goodness.
And so we basically fucked like rabbits and with little or no protection.
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WhyNot,
“And so we basically fucked like rabbits ”
LOLLLLLLLL, and did you make many little bunnies for Easter?
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Look, Rory, you are not alone here. I was raised as a catholic and come from a irish heritage on both sides of my family. I really did go to a church named St. Monica in Detroit with a pastor named Father Mulchahey…he took over from Father Sullivan when he died. I was an altar boy who had to get up and go out in the frozen michigan morning…we used to comb our hair with water and think it was funny when it froze in place. We did have an assistant pastor, Father Bretz who would get sloppy drunk during th morning mass. When you had to pour the wine from the crucibles into the chalice, he would grab your hand as you pulled away to make sure you poured all the wine in the chalice. Of course, the altar boys all snitched wine from the big deacnter in the sacristy. We also ate the unblessed hosts because they tasted like cheap fish food.
My catholic grade school education was run by a bunch of mentally deranged characters who should have never been allowed to have any contact with children. It truly was a case of pounding down any one who stood out. The male lay teachers were experts on strange maners of torture that they would always introduce with the phrase, “Here’s a little trick the Jesuits taught me.”
If they had been crafty enough to get away with public water boardings, we would have had may entertaining hours at St. Monica Grade School.I was never molested by a priest physically, but I had my head bashed against a tile wall by a psychotic nun…Sister Mary Noreen who personally, one day when I was 12, permanantly beat religion out of my heart! I never looked back and to this day I am actually grateful to the skanky bitch for forcing my eyes open and letting me see the universe for what it really is!
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one more thing…rory, I did go to the link for your song..
direct brutal poetry, sloppy as shit esthectically which is better than any phony ass polish!
In other words, I loved it1I think I am going to post a piece on the blasphemy thinbg I if you don’t mind…I will p[ut up your YouTube video!
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WhyNot, Microdot
At least you had girls around in school, mine was all boys, boarders and day boys. thank sweet baby Jesus I was a day boy. It was run by priests and had a seminary attached. It was described recently in the National Irish media as a hotbed of pedophilia, priests fucking boys, a friend and now neighbor of mine had the full experience, anally raped by a priest. That priest killed himself the day before his trial was to begin in 1998.
Apart from brutal physical beatings which were pretty normal, the worst that happened to me was I got my arse pinched by a different priest than the one who had his wicked way with my friend. That priest did time for rape in the ’90s. Not enough, 3 years I think.
This school was seen as super respectable when i was there (1979-1984) it was a miserable shithole. I begged by parents to let me leave for 2 years, before I sunk into apathy and took to drinking and drugging and bunking off school.
Microdot,
I too was an alter boy, before I went to that horrible school. The priest was cool, he quit soon after because he got a local woman pregnant. He is ever since happily married to that woman and delivers coal for a living. He was the best priest I ever met. Moral: let them marry. less chance of attracting perverts to the job,
Rory
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Yeah, the only experience with an “all boys” class was my grade school home room teacher in the 8th grade, Mr. Garleski, who (honestly, I am not exagerating) weighed over 600 pounds…..he had a modified Pontiac that was reinforced to let him drive with out destroying the suspension. This guy wasn’t a pervert? He was fucking nuts and had a sawed off golf club called “Old Betsy’. Of course his sadism only inspired us to scale the mountain of delinquincy. He inspired a reign of reciprocal terror. Sure, he would whip the asses of every boy in his class, but we set fires and on one memorable occasion I brought in 50 pounds of dry ice which we stuffed in all of the toilets….creating a dry ice fog which seeped into the hallway causing the nuns to freak out and call the fire department.
Sure, I got whipped, but it was worth it!
This experience ony reinforces my belief that Al Qaeda terrorism is as much of the fault of the idiots who manage Americas foreign policy as those who are inspired to perpetrate it. -
Well, Catholic girls in the early 60’s….
There was an art called “dry humping” it’s how little kids kinda go all the way, but not really….
Hormones will not be denied………. -
Terrorism? did you know that a cherry bomb is equivalent to 1/8 stick of dyamite, and the fuse is waterproof and can be flushed down a toilet? My, what that will do plumbing. Just in case you needed to know….
-
So basically…
…catholic education is counter productive, creating terrorists rather than meek and mild followers of Jesus. But it does keep a lot of sado-masochists, obese people and kiddie fiddlers in gainful employment, every cloud has a silver lining.
…hmm…
Rory -
m,
Explain that to me again how dumping dry ice in the toilet to freak out the nuns is similar to trying blow up yourself and a jet full of innocent people over the city of Detroit. I mean they’re both just good fun, right?
TLGK
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TLGK,
“I mean they’re both just good fun, right?”
Absolutely. Even better fun is blowing up a jet full of nuns and watching them jump out and go down using their long robes as parachutes. This gives you a chance to check out their warez and how many priests are under those robes, praying to virgin Mary’s holy hymen.
Detroit? Ah… that’s Microdot home territory. Ok Microdot, what have you been up to lately, huh? Come on, don’t be shy, we can take it. I told you time and time again that “Detroit” in EN is not the same as “détruit” in FR.
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No. Mr. Whynot, Detroit is a good old french word, there is a Detroit on the Gorges du Tarn in the Cevenne. It means ” of the strait”…a narrow place on a river or a place connecting two larger bodies of water.
I won’t descend into the idiocy of explaining in detail my analogy to TLGK….why feed into idiotic outrage?
Many Americans have seem to have turned in 5 year old children, afraid of the dark. There’s bad things and bad people everywhere…strange noises. they are terrorized and outraged. Bad people have to be stoipped with what ever it takes. If you can’t find the bad guys in the desert, then punish everyone who looks like them! You can’t be too careful. If the definition of a terrorist is someone who terrorizes and now you aren’t allowed to get out of your plane seat to use the toilet because everyone is terrorized, then I’d say the terrorists have won.Terrorism, like religion is mostly a mental condition.
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Microdot,
“If the definition of a terrorist is someone who terrorizes and now you aren’t allowed to get out of your plane seat to use the toilet because everyone is terrorized, then I’d say the terrorists have won.”
Like your “dreaded curry” syndrome picture, yes, lol?
“Detroit is a good old french word, there is a Detroit on the Gorges du Tarn in the Cevenne. It means ” of the strait”…a narrow place on a river or a place connecting two larger bodies of water”
Like Barb’s throat?
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M,
I gave you the opportunity to explain yourself. The only idiocy is your analogy. It reflects a combination of ignorance and arrogance, which is a pernicious cocktail. It is quite the most stupid thing you have written since you attempted to explain Somali pirates by stating that the only reason why these poor fisherman have reverted to crime is b/c Somali waters have been fished out by other nations.
Look, if you are unwilling to defend your opinions, keep talking about Parochial school when you were a kid. At least that is a subject w/ which you are familiar.
TLGK
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Microdot, Stiletto,
“a narrow place on a river or a place connecting two larger bodies of water”
Like Barb’s throat?”LOLLLLLLLL, Mr Pee, can you make a drawing of this?
WhyNot,
“Even better fun is blowing up a jet full of nuns and watching them jump out and go down using their long robes as parachutes. This gives you a chance to check out their warez and how many priests are under those robes, praying to virgin Mary’s holy hymen.”
LOLLLLLLLL, Mr Pee please make a drawing of this too!
“Like your “dreaded curry” syndrome picture, yes, lol?”
YES! That was a wonderful picture, Microdot, thank you.
TLGK,
Did you have bad Christmas or are you grumpy all the time? You remind me of Snake Hunters. Do you not have a sense of humor? And don’t tell me I’m a stupid cow, because I looked in my mirror again, and I don’t look like a cow. And also, cows do’nt write on computer keyboards, so it can’t be me.
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My we are full of outrage today! Are you installing full body scanners at your mile long driveway entrance to your ranchero and strip searching all all swarthy skinned suspected non approved western religion humans?
And if you think that my piece on Somali pirates stopped with the reason you quoted, then you again are guilty of selectively editing facts to fit your bluster. Perhaps that is why no one takes you seriously….
Always one bubble off the truth to make it fit your preconcieved notions
Maybe this video will make you feel better…. -
Since obviously, TLGK would have us believe that he was never a kid, and his idea of rebellion was to perhaps tie his cravat with an unusual version of the demi windsor knot….
Children are not born terrorists. Terrorism is not a trait that can be genetically profiled. Terrorism is a response to oppressive behaviour by people who believe they have no other weapon.
These people and those who can be manipulated by those who would like to use this desparation as a political tool commit terrorist acts.Usually, the oppressor responds with force to stop the terrorist acts and if they don’t stop, they respond with more and more force. This creates a cycle of mutual destruction. One side never really wins. You can look at many, many historical models that bear this out.
You can find situations where one side “wins” but it always a qualified victory.My grade school analogy which was made tongue in cheek, I realize that this is a big conceptual jump for some, referred to the cycle of pranks which escalated as the retribution grew. We willingly took our swats for the good of our rebellion. The seriousness of the pranking turned into criminal mischief.
Now, I suppose TLGK is outraged because I seem to disparrage the seriousness that Al Qaeda is to him and the threat he percieves to himself, his country, his flag, his loved ones. I would believe that he would say that they are a threat that has to be dealt with in the most decisively final way possible.
We know that Al Qaeda is not an organization as such. They are an idea, a contagious meme existing in cells with different leaders and different goals. The different organizations recruit.
I saw a pretty harrowing report on Al Jazeera last night of an” Al Qaeda ” training camp in Southern Algeria. It was clandestinely filmed by an Al Jazeera reporter. The camp was bare boned survivalist training. The members ate lizards.Now, we know that Al Qaeda affiliated cells grew 250% after the American invasion of Iraq. We know that there was no real Al Qaeda presence in Iraq or Pakistan until 2003. Why is this?
Why do these cells have the ability to recruit from the upper class educated societies, such as the Saudis or the rich Nigerian kid who tried to blow up the plane in Detroit? If you look at the profile of many of the Iraqi suicide bombers, you find that they come from upper class educated backgrounds that would not fit your atypical “profile” prototype.Why can’t we realize that we are the motor that powers this cycle of destruction?
Why can’t we be brave enough to do something different?…. because it is never too late to change.
Why are we dead set on repeating the same historical cycle?Okay, you can turn off the lights, TLGK, I looked under the bed. There’s nothing there. Go back to sleep.
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microdot,
I totally agree with you last two comments EXCEPT for you comparison of TLGK with good old Grover.
Grover has a sense of humour.Rory
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Microdot,
Your comment 340… Thank you, thank you. Like you know, I used to hate Americans because of my past, but when I meet ones like you, it’s like it a new discovery that there are beautiful people everywhere.
Rowry dog,
Who is Grover? Not another dog you have, lol? WhyNot sent me some beautiful music from an American saxophone player, his name is Grover Washington.
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m,
Are you saying I misquoted you regarding Somali pirates? Misrepresented what you said? Reprint what you said (I have no idea where the cite is) and if I am wrong, I will own up to it.
“Terrorism is a response to oppressive behaviour by people who believe they have no other weapon.
These people and those who can be manipulated by those who would like to use this desparation as a political tool commit terrorist acts.”
Well that is partly right and might explain why a Palestinian straps explosives to his or her body and walks into a cafe in Israel and flips the switch.
It does not, however, explain why on August 7, 1998, suicide bombers outside the U.S. embassies in Dar es Salaam and Nairobi detonated trucks full of explosives. 12 Americas were killed but so were 200 Kenyans and Tanzanians, while 4,000 people were wounded, nearly all of them, not Americans.
I don’t think I need to draw you a laundry list. I will defer to Rory if he wishes to discuss terrorism in his home country, but those troubles seem to have subsided.
As for suicide bombings, one can draw several conclusions. Not all Muslims are terrorists, much less suicide bombers, but all suicide bombers are Muslims. The majority of such violence is committed against other Muslims in situations which seems contrary to your second sentence.
In the case of the young Nigerian who attempted to blow up himself and an airliner on Christmas Day, what was he protesting? How was he oppressed? He was the scion of wealth and educated. Last time I checked, the U.S. was not overtly oppressing any peoples in Nigeria.
“Why can’t we realize that we are the motor that powers this cycle of destruction?”
The short answer to your question is: We’re not.
There are branches of Islam just as there are branches of Christianity. Unfortunately, there lived Abd al-Wahhab, who was an 18th century scholar from what is today Saudi Arabia. He advocated a process of purifying Islam (based on his own views and understanding of Islam) from innovation. He condemned those who seek to innovate Islam as Kafirs or Infidels, who should be purged (read killed).
Salafism received a huge boost when Saudi Arabia became rich from petro dollars. The effect of Salafism or Wahhabism has been profoundly negative on Arab and Muslim culture. Think about the cultural effect of discouraging innovation. Whereas for a period after the rise of Islam, Muslims were scientifically progressive (see innovations in Algebra) since the rise of Salafism/Wahhabism the sciences have stagnated.
This is not a religious sect of tolerance. This is a sect whose philosophy is: if you are different you must conform or you must die. It matters not if you are another Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, or a Buddhist. Your nationality does not matter.
It is the Salafists like Osama bin Laden who wish to reinstate the Caliphate and return the world to the 7th century.
As I stated previously, not all Muslims adhere to this credo but the ones who become suicide bombers do. Flip the switch and wake up in paradise attended by 72 perfect beings.
You, m, seem to be of the school of “Blame America first.” Why you are like this, I cannot say b/c I do not know. Whereas, I do not blindly support all American policies, foreign or domestic, nor do I believe that we as a nation are a cause of the evil in the world–so long as you leave out Iraq inasmuch as although Saddam Hussein was a monster, I do not believe that we did the average Iraqi or the other people in the region a great favor by deposing him. As bad as was the disease, the cure was worse.
The bottom line is that al Qaeda and its ilk are not only at war w/ western civilization, they are war w/ everyone who is different. We are an easier target than China. (NB the Uighars have no connection to al Qaeda.)
I favor learning from history.
“Now, I suppose TLGK is outraged because I seem to disparrage the seriousness that Al Qaeda is to him and the threat he percieves to himself, his country, his flag, his loved ones. I would believe that he would say that they are a threat that has to be dealt with in the most decisively final way possible.”
Al Qaeda is a threat to everyone. And you do disparage the seriousness of of the threat. Suppose you had been flying to Detroit Christmas Day? m, suppose I walked into the little town in France in which you reside, found your house, and blew it, you, your wife, and your animals to smithereens b/c you do believe exactly what I do. Do you have a problem with that idea? Yes or no?
The fact is, that by attempting to explain suicide bombing in the fashion you do, you appear to condone it, which I am quite certain you do not.
The 4,200 Kenyans and Tanzanians do not share your sense of humor on this subject and for someone who spent a significant part of his adult life in NYC and still has an apartment there, I am consternated by your indifference.
OK, m, you can turn off the lights and if one does not go in your head, turn on al Jazeera and blame America.
TLGK
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Yes, you totally misrepresented what I said. I’m not your fucking idiot boy and I don’t have to pay attention to your ridiculous attempts at intimidating cross examinations…go back and retrieve your own miserable bullshit.
I can retrieve your ridiculous out of context blurt on my blog regarding the “Climate Change Scandal” emails, but you don’t even seem to have been concious enough to even remember writing it. At least you conveniently ignored any reference to it when I brought it up here.Had you actually read my post regarding the Somalian Pirates, you would have realized that i was writing about an environmental catastrophe involving the Berlusconi government and the Italian Mafia and the dumping of massive amounts of radioactive and chemical waste off the coast of Somalia as well as the illegal over fishing of the territorial waters off the coast of Somalia.
But none of this matters in your hysterically historical interpretation of Islamic hate.
Yea, I admit I still have an apartment in NYC and visit there often. I was an eye witness to the WTC bombings…One of my closest friends is dying of lung cancer which her doctors think was caused by the toxic debris of the bombing…she lives on the corner of Broadway and 3rd Street.
But even she will never have or feed into the hatred that seems to have infected your very marrow. If anything, for a lot of people, the WTC bombing opened their eyes to the rest of the world!You use images of imagined disasters to try to infect me with your hatred. What if Islamic terrorists killed my wife, burned my house and destroyed my village?
I said earlier that terrorism was a mental condition like religion and you my friend are a plague victim and a real carrier of this disease.Just your last sentence…regarding Al Jazeera totally reveals the depths of your mindless hatred….
You just do not know what you are talking about. -
Stilletto,
Please don’t call me Rowdy_Dog. Rowdy_Dog is a figment of Yogi’s imagination. I don’t take any responsibility for his scurrilous remarks
.Who is Grover? OMG what did you watch on TV when you were a kid in Mother Russia. Grover is a naive and lovable puppet on the greatest children’s television program ever made, Sesame Street. It;’s made by public service television in America but I have seen it in every country I have lived in (Ireland, UK, Germany). Gosh you had a deprived childhood.
TLGK,
I don’t think I need to draw you a laundry list. I will defer to Rory if he wishes to discuss terrorism in his home country, but those troubles seem to have subsided.
I don’t tend use the ‘T’ word Loop, freedom fighters, especially the Provisional I.R.A, who were formed to defend the nationalist communities in Belfast and Derry from unionist pogroms.
My crowd, the Official IRA dumped arms in 1971 because they thought the campaign was descending into terrorism. There were atrocities carried out by both sides that could be described a terrorist acts, but some of the worst were carried out by the British Army and the SAS.Are they ‘terrorists’?
Rory
I don’t think I need to draw you a laundry list. I will defer to Rory if he wishes to discuss terrorism in his home country, but those troubles seem to have subsided.
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M,
Why don’t you fuck yourself? You may not be my fucking idiot boy but you tend to reason like a fucking idiot so if the shoe fits… So far as the Somali pirates are concerned, just reprint what you wrote and let a candid audience judge.
So far as my interpretation of history is concerned, precisely which part of it is incorrect?
I don’t hate Muslims. I think it is reasonable to decry the terrorist and anti humanist acts of those Muslims who blow up themselves together w/ a multitude of innocent civilians, mostly other Muslims. If you do not despise that practice then you are not right in the head. But in the world according to microdot, 9/11 was the fault of the United States.
Perhaps you should learn to think critically. Do you deny that the leaked e-mails discredited those scientists from that university who sought to suppress opposing points of views and studies that did not support their position? My comment, as nearly as I can remember was “The leaked e-mails did not further the cause.” How can you not agree? You think the leaked e-mails helped promote the position of those who seek to slow climate change?
Terrorism is a mental condition like religion? I think most religions are fine. I think any sect of a religion that promotes wanton killing into return for the promise of paradise is an abomination. If you do not, which one of us is insane?
Rory,
Correct me if I’m wrong. Notwithstanding the the fact that Catholics were on one side of the conflict and Protestants on the other, wasn’t the conflict essentially a political one as opposed to a religious one? You were there. I’ll defer to your opinion.
My point was, however, that there was a fundamental difference in the nature of the violence in Ireland as opposed to that in Tanzania, Kenya, and New York, that being, if bombs were employed, suicide was not part of the process.
I suppose it’s a good thing that the Church regards suicide as a mortal sin.
TLGK
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TLGK,
“Why don’t you fuck yourself? You may not be my fucking idiot boy but you tend to reason like a fucking idiot so if the shoe fits”
Lollll, I like it when you talk dirty. Do you talk like this when you are in a court case?
“My point was, however, that there was a fundamental difference in the nature of the violence in Ireland as opposed to that in Tanzania, Kenya, and New York, that being, if bombs were employed, suicide was not part of the process.”
I don’t see any difference in the result. The result is that a lot of people who do not want to fight end up dead. What makes dropping atomic bombs on Japan ok? Because it wasn’t suicidal? But if Japanese kamikaze planes blow themselves on American navy then it’s horrible because it’s suicides?
People use what they can to fight. I don’t know much about history but a little bit, and it has always been like this. If your army is stronger than the other army, you blow them up. If it is weaker, you use plots to blow them up in underground warfare.
What makes normal warfare more noble than underground one? Because it is “officially declared”? Fuck that shit: in normal warfare, the clean one that you think it is, I mean not “terrorism” or “suicide bombing”, do you think that the army tells the army of the opponents “we are going to bomb you at 6:30 in the morning, so make sure you leave your town because we don’t want to hurt you”? Is this what USA did with the Japanese people in Nagasaki and Hiroshima?
Where I come from, I don’t remember suicide bombings exactly, but many attacks against Russian tanks were very suicidal because the chances those men and women took were very like zero to escape.
So you can say Chechnyan men and women are terrorists, yes. And you know? I am proud that they are.
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TLGK,
The Northern Ireland conflict was entirely political, however in the main Unionists are protestant and Nationalists are catholic. There are many exceptions to this rule. Really though it’s a matter of aspiration, Unionists tend to conservative and monarchist, all Unionists want to remain in the UK.
Nationalists tend to be more left wing and all want to live in some kind Irish political entity. Unionists tend to be descendants of planters (people who were granted land in Ireland by the British crown from Tudor times onward), Nationalists tend to be decendants of ‘natives’ for want of a better word. The terms Republican and Nationalist are used I suppose to separate those who insist that there should be an Irish republic that covers the whole island of Ireland totally independent of the UK and those who would settle for some compromise solution.
In 1968 when the troubles began there was terrible discrimination against Nationalists which included gerrymandering (rigging electoral districts to insure unionist control of important district councils and parliament seats), a totally biased, para-military police force and massive discrimination in areas such as jobs and public housing.
The troubles started with the civil rights movement, a peaceful campaign of protest and civil disobedience inspired by Gandhi and MLK. These protests were brutally put down by the police and loyalist (unionist) mobs, who then proceeded to burn down whole streets where nationalists lived. In the end the Republicans armed and organized themselves to defend and police nationalist areas.
During the course of the troubles there were purely sectarian murders committed by both sides, but many more were committed by loyalist gangs than the more politically motivated republican groups, who tried to target police and members of the armed forces.
Rory
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“Why don’t I go fuck myself!” Thank You My friend, you have made my day!
Let’s see what levels of outrage you will rise to today, after all you seem to have nothing better to do than to try to get us to ride along on your little flaming tricycle of outrage. the dayglo handle bar streamers are a nice touch.Now at least you admitted that you actually remember your incoherent blurt about the East Anglican College Emails and that you are part of the idiocy that wants to use portions of these pirated communications to disprove human involvement in climate change.
You have one lame line, everything boils down to denial and guilt. If I question the role of the west in the empowering and creation of terrorists, then I must hate America.
If I even hint that Israel could be guilty of inhuman crimes against the Palestinians, then I am an idiot terrorist.Did anyone see the film on ARTE last night: Le Monde Selon Monsanto….?
Another anti corporate, anti American, there fore subversive evil propaganda movie about how Monsaato is destroying the worlds food supply overtly and covertly and why the European Union must pass laws to protect Europe from OGM NOW!
A really great film. -
“In the case of the young Nigerian who attempted to blow up himself and an airliner on Christmas Day, what was he protesting? How was he oppressed? He was the scion of wealth and educated. Last time I checked, the U.S. was not overtly oppressing any peoples in Nigeria.”
You obviously are not up to speed on the involvement of America in Central Africa. And that was not my point of the question I asked you and you know it!
“Why can’t we realize that we are the motor that powers this cycle of destruction?”
The short answer to your question is: We’re not.
Oh, but we are and it’s only your self righteous tunnel vision blindness that prevents you from seeing the interaction, the cause and effect that has fueled the militant muslim extremists and keeps pouring gasoline on the fire. The cells of Al Qaeda now are led by fighters who have gained years of experience and knowlege in Iraq. It’s been 7 years since the invasion, almost a decade of time to hone and acquire hatred and learn how to deal with our tactics.
The drones that are active in Pakistan are flown and controlled by a private company tht the US Military has subcontracted it out to. Pakistani hackers have broken the programming code and they are now able to disrupt the flights of the drones and in some cases turn them onto Pakistani government and NATO troops.There are branches of Islam just as there are branches of Christianity. Unfortunately, there lived Abd al-Wahhab, who was an 18th century scholar from what is today Saudi Arabia. He advocated a process of purifying Islam (based on his own views and understanding of Islam) from innovation. He condemned those who seek to innovate Islam as Kafirs or Infidels, who should be purged (read killed).
Salafism received a huge boost when Saudi Arabia became rich from petro dollars. The effect of Salafism or Wahhabism has been profoundly negative on Arab and Muslim culture. Think about the cultural effect of discouraging innovation. Whereas for a period after the rise of Islam, Muslims were scientifically progressive (see innovations in Algebra) since the rise of Salafism/Wahhabism the sciences have stagnated.
This is not a religious sect of tolerance. This is a sect whose philosophy is: if you are different you must conform or you must die. It matters not if you are another Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, or a Buddhist. Your nationality does not matter.
If the rise of Wahhabism is so ultimately harmful to the States which have adopted it, then why are they some of the richest countries on the planet? Again, I don’t support Wahhabism, but I think that it is a legitimate question. The Wahhabist benefactors of petro dollars seem to have made a convenient arrangement with modern technology and science.
I think many Christian sects are just as oppressive and innately violent. If you were selectively condemn Christianity by the members who interpretations of the more insane sections of the bible have inspired religious movements, like the mormons, or almost any fundamentalist sect, you could portray a very damning case against christianity, which many people do.
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Ah microdot. You remind of some lines written by Delbert McClinton: “The more your lips keep movin’, the more you keep losin’ ground.”
Now that the F bombs, to Stiletto’s amusement, have garnered your attention. Let us examine what I wrote and how you responded.
For those unfamiliar with the news item, in November of last year, persons unknown hacked into the computers of, stole, then released on-line more than a decade of e-mails from one of the world’s leading centers for climate-change research, the Hadley Climatic Research Unit (CRU) at Britain’s University of East Anglia.
Among the hundreds of e-mails, 10 to 20 messages seem to indicate that scientists at CRU and their correspondents considered deleting information requested by critics in the context of British and American freedom of information laws, and in at least two separate cases discussed how to have associate editors of peer-reviewed journals removed from their posts because they accepted critics’ papers for publication.
I remarked that these particular e-mails did not advance the cause of those who believe in global warming and/or anthropomorphic global warming. I am uncertain how anyone can argue w/ this proposition.
There are any number of global warming deniers, however, I do not count myself among them. Smaller sheep on St. Kilda; alterations in migration and breeding habits of some avian species; reduction of Arctic Ocean sea ice; and glacier melting have convinced me the planet is warming. But when I stated that the purloined e-mails were unhelpful to the cause of those who support the idea of global warming, in microdot’s mind that made me a global warming denier, causing him to write in comment #349:
“Now at least you admitted that you actually remember your incoherent blurt about the East Anglican College Emails and that you are part of the idiocy that wants to use portions of these pirated communications to disprove human involvement in climate change.”
This reminiscent of a series of comments above. no_splappz made a comment in #162. I quoted parted of it in #165. Microdot went off on me in # 169. I pointed this out to him in #171 and he was contrite enough to admit his error in #172.
Let us continue:
“You have one lame line, everything boils down to denial and guilt. If I question the role of the west in the empowering and creation of terrorists, then I must hate America.
If I even hint that Israel could be guilty of inhuman crimes against the Palestinians, then I am an idiot terrorist.”My comment # 343 read in part:
“You, m, seem to be of the school of “Blame America first.” Why you are like this, I cannot say b/c I do not know. Whereas, I do not blindly support all American policies, foreign or domestic, nor do I believe that we as a nation are a cause of the evil in the world…”
So where did I state that you hate America, microdot. Don’t bother to look. I didn’t
Unlike to microdot, many of you did not learn English as a first language. These definitions are from the Merriam-Webster Dictionary which I consider to be an authoritative one:
Main Entry: 1blame
Pronunciation: \ˈblām\
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Form(s): blamed; blam•ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French blamer, blasmer, from Late Latin blasphemare to blaspheme, from Greek blasphēmein
Date: 13th century
1 : to find fault with : censure
2 a : to hold responsible b : to place responsibility forMain Entry: hate
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): hat•ed; hat•ing
Date: before 12th century
transitive verb 1 : to feel extreme enmity toward
2 : to have a strong aversion to : find very distasteful intransitive verb : to express or feel extreme enmity or active hostilityAs for the second sentence, microdot, whatever my opinions are regarding Israel, I challenge you to find an instance when I have called you a “terrorist.” As for the readers of this comment, you need not expend any time looking for this as it never occurred.
““Why can’t we realize that we are the motor that powers this cycle of destruction?”
The short answer to your question is: We’re not.Oh, but we are and it’s only your self righteous tunnel vision blindness that prevents you from seeing the interaction, the cause and effect that has fueled the militant muslim extremists and keeps pouring gasoline on the fire. The cells of Al Qaeda now are led by fighters who have gained years of experience and knowlege in Iraq. It’s been 7 years since the invasion, almost a decade of time to hone and acquire hatred and learn how to deal with our tactics.”
If your comment relates to whether the tactics of United States have been effect in counter al Qaeda, that is a matter of fair debate. But initially that is not what you said nor is it what you meant.
In #340, you wrote:
“Now, I suppose TLGK is outraged because I seem to disparrage the seriousness that Al Qaeda is to him and the threat he percieves to himself, his country, his flag, his loved ones. I would believe that he would say that they are a threat that has to be dealt with in the most decisively final way possible.”
This organization was responsible for 9/11. 9/11 had nothing to do w/ U.S. foreign policy. 9/11 has everything to do w/ Muslim extremists who are not only anti secular and anti Western civilization but are anti everything that does not conform to their rigid code of beliefs and who wish to return the world to the 7th century Caliphate.
If any of the above is incorrect, microdot, make your point. And al Qaeda in Iraq (AQM—Al Qaeda in Mesopotamia)? Who did those guys kill? Was it most Americans or mostly Iraqis? Why do you think the Sunni tribes turned against them?
“If the rise of Wahhabism is so ultimately harmful to the States which have adopted it, then why are they some of the richest countries on the planet? Again, I don’t support Wahhabism, but I think that it is a legitimate question. The Wahhabist benefactors of petro dollars seem to have made a convenient arrangement with modern technology and science.”
Look sport, what do you think Saudi Arabia would look like if it were not sitting on oil reserves. Answer: It would look pretty much like it did a century ago. We are talking about a society governed by a monarchy and in which women are not even allowed to drive. I am not saying Saudi Arabia is not prosperous. I am merely saying that adopting a religious credo that discourages innovation has a pernicious trickledown effect on the society that adopts it. The Saudi government, recognizing this, has promoted programs that encourage inventiveness which rather supports my point.
By way of example, look what happened to China following the edict of 1448 during the Ming Dynasty.
You wrote:
“ I think many Christian sects are just as oppressive and innately violent. If you were selectively condemn Christianity by the members who interpretations of the more insane sections of the bible have inspired religious movements, like the mormons, or almost any fundamentalist sect, you could portray a very damning case against christianity, which many people do.”
No. They aren’t as insanely violent. Historically, perhaps, and on occasion (see Branch Davidians) but there is not major Christian sect that is anywhere as violent as Salafist extremists, although that last phrase may be redundant. When was the last time a Southern Baptist, walked into a mall with explosives on his body and blew up himself b/c there were some women Methodists shopping w/ their children?
It is ironic that you have become so reactionary that you are completely unable to read and analyze. Anyone who doesn’t toe the microdot line must be a right wing fascist jingoist lunatic. It seems to me that type of attitude resembles another philosophy discussed here
Regards,
TLGK
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This is getting really good….
I’m glad that I personally have kept you from spreading your bullshit all over your regular wallowing grounds.
I am very pleased that I have become your personal anti christ or what ever….
Feel free to entertain me more with your brain damaged drivel. -
By the way, I am kind of gratified but it is a rather weird feeling by your bizarre qualification about the East Anglican Emails….I truly thought by the non sequiter incoherence of your post that you were trumpeting that the emails were evidence that the human evidence of climate change was a hoax. You really had me convinced, now I am relieved that it was all part of your craftily concieved plan to save the planet.
Garrrrr, if you were a terrorist, we’d be doomed as doomed can be, that’s for sure.
Now on with your damning diatribe, please sir, we all await, languidly fanning our inflamed genitalia with palm fronds. -
Ok…,
This is all very exciting but… what I wanna know is:
Does anybody have pictures of those nuns flying out of the airplane?
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SS,
Not me.
microdot,
Jesus wept. (shortest verse in the Bible, John 11:35) You still don’t get it. If you advocate a position such as global warming and then it is revealed that you have “cooked the books” by attempting to manipulate the data, you do not further your cause. Instead people start thinking that your science may not be genuine.
Probably, I will spend little further time bitch slapping your inanities. I think I made my point inasmuch as you are unable to refute any of it. Just remember that “blame”and “hate” have no senses in common.
TLGK
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ShitStirrer,
“Does anybody have pictures of those nuns flying out of the airplane?”
LOLLL, maybe Mr Pee can make a photoshop drawing? I am trying to imagine them flapping their arms and their long dresses used as parachutes showing all the priests praying to virgin Mary’s hymen.
TLGK,
“Anyone who doesn’t toe the microdot line must be a right wing fascist jingoist lunatic. It seems to me that type of attitude resembles another philosophy discussed here”
Do you mean like if a French girl like me doesn’t agree with you, then I am a stupid cow?
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TLGK, I don’t see how a “bitch-slapping” by a semi ambulant bigot has had any effect here.
This is beginning to resemble a ridiculous opera. You repeatedly make statements based on your own personal warped mythology and then think that your bellicose attitude makes your point obvious.
Yes, the last piece with quotations and citing verses and definitions was pretty nifty, you must have spent hours researching it and you still have come off as a total jack ass and have reinforced your image as the guy who you just don’t want to interact with because he will use his laundy list of nasty names and stereotypes to try to inflict some kind of imaginary psychological damage from his toasty fantasy world somewhere in an undisclosed bunker location.Your words will only harden the attitudes of those you wish to “convert”.
I could never expect you to change and I don’t think anything I or anyone else here could change your percieved mission. Change has to come from with in …a personal revelation.By not attempting to understand and know those you wish to influence, you will never have the ability ot really communicate with them. It’s like you see the world as a twisted carnival game.
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By the way, I reaize, that I have made assumptions about you and I don’t really know you enough to state these things with any kind of accuracy, but then again…..I am beginning to suspect that you would not be a very good guest in any case and I would only end up throwing your car keys down the well.
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Why can’t we all just get along. Global warming is a fact! Look at any glacier. Why do people deny this? Is it that they love their SUVs more than the future of the planet?
Rory
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Rory, you have stated a simple obvious fact that any meth head mind game playing lawyer woud just love to bitch slap around the block for the simple gratification of his bloated ego. Not that it would change anytihng.
I think I hear the mating Belch of a savage lust crazed lawyer in the distance….
I better put on my steel plated platinum armored under wear! -
I know I’ve been bad, but at least I admit it! For every one else, I am unleashing my NUNS OF MASS DESTRUCTION!
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Ah the nuns at last! But not a pair of knickers in sight, damm!
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UU,
“But not a pair of knickers in sight, damm! ”
Oh yes there is:
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Valerie,
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. The validity of that opinion is based upon whether it is informed one. I am not speaking about personal preferences such as “blue is my favorite color” or “I like chocolate ice cream.”
But if you are going to take a position on a issue that is arguable, then you should be able to support it. Almost always, you need to support it w/ facts.
This is why intelligent people from all parts of the political spectrum view as loons those who say that “Barack Obama was born in Kenya” or “Barrack Obama is a Muslim,” yet there are thousands of people in this country who actually believe both of these falsehoods. The reason why is perplexing and I have yet to able to explain it.
Rory,
I read an article earlier this week by David Broks of the New York Times which I will reproduce if you wish. It was about the politicization of global warming. Actually it was about the influence of a recent political movement here called Tea Bag Partyers. This is a reactionary group that is basically anti government; anti taxation; and ultimately, anti progress.
Brooks made the point that as the individual members of our government accept global warming and attempt to pass legislation to address it, the resistance to accepting that the planet is warming seems to be growing in this country. Do these people love their SUVs? Yes, they do, but even more so, the are covetous of what their SUVs represent. To them, their SUVs represent individual freedom like their constitutional right to bear arms.
Is this the exaltation of personal prerogative over the common good? Indeed it is.
Microdot,
You are not the jury. I am not trying to persuade you. I doing something much easier which is simply to prove that many of your positions are rarely predicated on evidence based reality.
Hence the Socratic comparison in #351.I agree that change must come from within. Plato, quoting Socrates, said: “The life which is unexamined is not worth living.”
TLGK
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TLGK,
It’s fucking cold in Ireland now, so I was planning a ski-ing trip, but then the thought crossed my mind that I hadn’t eaten. I havn’t eaten a lawyer in a while.
Watch out, I know where you live and I heard the ski-ing is good there,
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog
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Rowdy Dog,
It’s fucking cold here too. Below 0 degrees F at night. Wind chill below that. The skiing is usually good but the snow pack all over the state is below normal. As for eating lawyers, we are not particularly wholesome. It is kind of like eating fugu but w/o the sex appeal.
TGK
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TLGK,
I’m a fucking dog, I eat week old dead rats I find lying under dumpsters! I’m sure you are tasty enough.
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy-Dog
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No_Slappz,
“The world would benefit a lot from a barrage of cruise missiles fired into the center of government in Tehran.”
You Sir, are the nastist, dumbest piece of shit it has ever been my profound displeasure to come across. You will rot in hell motherfucker.
Rory
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UU/Rory,
“You Sir, are the nastist, dumbest piece of shit it has ever been my profound displeasure to come across. You will rot in hell motherfucker.”
LOLLLLL, who is No_Slappz?
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Valérie,
No_Slappz is a low-life redneck cracker, he commented earlier in this thread (#162) from which I quoted above, he spends a lot of time on SNAKEHUNTERS. Snakey boy and Amillieniest think he’s some class of genius but then again they are not exactly the sharpest knives in the box are they?
No_Slappz occasionally visits Blog of Blogs where he is always welcome, he is so fucking nasty and stupid and predictable that he makes me laugh.
Rory
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Valérie,
Amillenniest (he who dwells in a museum in Istanbul) meanwhile can find nothing better to write about on his charming little blog but myself and my friends, who he describes as “self loathing westerners”. Gosh, I feel like a celebrity . Oh wait now, no one reads his blog, damm!
(I didn’t even read the article, after a promising first paragraph about myself, it degenerated into a semi-pornographic rant about some rapist called Mahammed or something.)
Anyway, enough of this shit,
Rory
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Kids,
You can’t tell the players w/o a scorecard.
Amillennist is a resident of California, I think. He is older, a right wing reactionary, and either a very devout Catholic or a fundamentalist Christian. In one exchange on Snake Hunters, which I assiduously avoided, he argued Biblical Scripture and Koranic verses w/ Mohamed. He does not inhabit any type of evidence based reality, therefore, I cannot recommend anyone reading him.
no_slappz is an entirely different kettle of fish. He is hardly a red neck cracker. He is educated, lives in Brooklyn, works in the financial district in NYC, and has his own blog, which the few times I have visited it, seems to concerned w/ his neighborhood in Brooklyn. He seemed to be little more rational a few years back as now he refers to President Obama as a Muslim or semi Muslim. no_slappz is very anti Muslim, to the point of being racist. There are usually a few nuggets underneath his extremism.
He did say “the world would benefit from a barrage of cruise missiles fired into the cenetr of the government of Iran.” Now nobody here, me included, advocates that method of problem solving. Nevertheless, how many of this blog’s readers believe that the current Iranian regime is a force for good either for Iranians or anybody else? If anyone so believe, I invite you make your case.
Rowdy Dog, Rowdy Dog, Rowdy Dog,
Week old dead rats from underneath dumpsters are delicacies compared to lawyers whose flesh is poisonous as I attempted to advise earlier.
TLGK
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TLGK,
Thanks for differentiating between these two gentlemen for me. I had kind of figured that they were different, but they both share this pretty unpleasant view of Islam. They seem to be very happy to advocate extreme and violent solutions to ‘the Muslim question’ . I dislike these armchair warriors intensely, and you know my feelings on sectarianism.
They have no balance or perspective, for example EVERYTHING your current president does is wrong, he is responsible for all the financial chaos (even though to an outside observer it is clear he inherited this disaster from his predecessor, who in the eyes of these two, could do not wrong). They are obviously narrow minded to the point of being retarded, yet both seem to regard themselves as some kind of expert in their field.
Amillennist is obviously just a religious nutbag living in a world of utter delusion, I seldom read No_Slappz, so am not sure exactly where he is coming from, I’ve tried to read him, but his bitter, nasty style just puts me off after a paragraph or two.
Rory
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Rory,
Your spot on. Some of the anti Obama matter floating around the Blue Nowhere makes you scratch your head. (”The current freezing weather? It’s Obama’s fault.”)
I think all the neocons, like no_slappz may have been pushed over the edge when Obama was elected. I tell you, every day is like a full moon.
TLGK
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TLGK,
On Iran, I don’t think much of their government. I would hate to live under any kind of religious regime, especially one that has such a willingness to use capital punishment and which treats women as second class citizens. However, this government is in place in reaction to the utterly ruthless and undemocratic regime of the Shah, who was installed in a US backed coup when an earlier, more secular, more democratic Iranian government proved unwilling to dance to the tune of the western puppeteers.
Furthermore, compared to some US allies in the mid-east, such as Saudi Arabia, Iran is a bastion of liberty, equality and fraternity. This double standard in US foreign policy always bothers me. It seems to me that the problem the US has with Iran is not the type of government it has, human rights or anything but the foreign policy, and as an independent sovereign state, Iran should be allowed choose it’s own foreign policy.
Rory
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Iran was becoming a pretty interesting place until the election of Ahmadinejad. The society, though under the control of the mullahs had developed a very open and loose flirtation with western ideas and freedom.
I have seen Iranian heavy metal bands and lots of alternative rock. There was even a YouTube video of the Tehran Symphony performing Pedros Dowry, an orchestral work by Frank Zappa. That video has seemed to disappeared.
I found that Sahra 2, the English Language Satellite channel eveh was a great news source for African and Islamic world news.
I firmly beieve that the election of Ahmadinejehad was a direct reaction to the rhetoric of the Bush administration. The diplomatic stance which was a rather immature slamming of doors and emotional hard line in light of the advances that had been made from the time of Reagan through the Clinton years.
After Ahmadinejad was elected, Sahra 2 became unwatchable and all of the personell disappeared, replaced with stiff characatures who spouted wooden propaganda. A few of the better reporters managed to get picked up by Al Jazeera and are in a position to do inside reportage on Iran that you won’t find anywhere else.Too bad for Iran. Now, I believe the country is on the edge of a military coup. I am not sure how that will play out, because the military is more neutral when it comes to the power of the ayatollahs and has some sympathy for the people, but it is going remain nasty. I really have so much sympathy for the urban population of Iran. They want freedom, they want to live in a modern westernized society and they were on the verge of having it.
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More on the current Iranian situation. The fragile balance of power is in the hands of Ahamadinejads clique, which includes the Basiji ad the Revolutionary Guards…The Guards and basiji are a loosely organized collections of cells and they are totally corrupt. They maintain their power and wealth throughthe network of smuggling to evade the sanctions imposed by the West.
The Ayahtollahs seem to have suffered as a group financially in the recent collapse of Dubai. Kahmeni was the richest individual in Iran through his corruption, he had set up his son as his heir…trying to initiate his own sort of religious nobility and insure his families continued control.
The word is that Kahmeni had been a very big investor in Dubai and he lost real big. This has upset the balance of an already shaky regime.
The opposition has taken a lot of bruising, but they have proved that they are in for the long haul and more and more observors are of the opinion that there will be a major shift in the power balance.
The Revolutionary Guard and Ahadinjads clique will lose their power, the Basiji will be dissolved and the army will sieze power in the next 6 months. Kahmeni will remain as a religious figure head but with diminished power….again, is this a good thing for the rest of the world? I don’t know how good, but I am an eternal optimist. -
Micodot,
I hope your optimism isn’t misplaced. I think Iran has great potential, it is one of only a few mid-eastern countries with a real sense of national identity rather than being a collection of lines drawn on a map following the collapse of the Ottoman and British Empires. It also has natural resources and some tradition of democracy.
As you have said, the urban populations are very open to modern culture and ideas.
I fear it could turn into another Afghanistan with civil war, foreign intervention and the rise of an even more backward looking Muslim fundamentalism. Let’s hope you are right and let’s hope the west shows a bit of subtlety whenever this shift in the balance of power takes place.
Rory
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oops I used Rowdy_Dog’s identity in that last comment. Yogi doesn’t care about this stuff, to be honest I think he’s better off.
Rory
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Urban Rowdyclass, sir…dog….
errr….I just read a great article in the LA TIMES which documented the spread of the opposition beyond Tehran and the rural and small city masses that Ahmadinejad counted on as his fundamentalist backbone is disintegrating.
You can bet your frozen doggie paws that the Russians will not tolerate intervention at their door step, especially with such an important potential energy source as Iran. that is the crux here, Iran still sits on huge untapped gas and oil fields. The exploitation of these has just begun…
Interstingly enough, this was one of the reasons that KBR/Halliburton relocated their world head quarters to Dubai 2 years ago. They needed a base of operations from which they could operate outside of the jurisdiction of the sanctions against Iran. Yes, Cheney is still a stock holder and plays a more active role now that he is out of national politics.
This looks to be a family affair as far as the possibility of an Iranian Revolution by the Green Anti Government forces.
It is important to look at who is making the noises about outside intervention and why!I’m having a great time reading about the ongoing debacle in Northern Irish Politics….
How old was the minister’s teenage boyfriend? -
Microdot,
Ah the Northern Ireland scandal, something that put a smirk on the face of just about every one in the Republic and most people North of the border. It has launched a billion text message jokes and a few funny YouTube parodies of the Simon and Garfunkel song ‘Mrs. Robinson’.
My favorite joke so far is;
Q. What has Iris Robinson in common with an IKEA wardrobe?
A. One dodgy screw and the whole cabinet falls apart.
The boyfriend is gone to ground, were he in England he would no doubt be negotiating a tell-all story to a tabloid newspaper. In Northern Ireland that could easily get him shot, I’d say he’s in fear of his life already.
What is so cool about this is that this woman is a sanctimonious Christian fundamentalist bitch prone to saying things like ‘homosexuality is evil’ and so on. This could destroy her whole party, the hard line, ultra conservative Democratic Unionist Party, and that would be no bad thing.
Rory
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oh, the boyfriend is 19, I think she’s 46
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UU,
“oh, the boyfriend is 19, I think she’s 46.”
No problem, UU, I’ll fuck her good and proper.
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Yeah, I just heard that the Northern Irish Governemnt just did fall apart….Coooollll!
When us lower class no moral gutter snipes fuck around, hey it’s no big deal, but when these holy rollers do it , well it’s just so….uhhhh….sordid and a wee bit creepy. Iris honey, could you put the nun costume on again and whip me with your rosary, you nasty little bitch? -
Hello, ladies and gentlemen! I have not been reading the blogs except for very sporadically. As always, thanks for making me laugh.
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ps, sent a pic for this post, Mme Grenouille, in her latest finery, lol.
Hi Valerie, Hi Stiletto, how are my favorite overseas ladies? Here’s hoping your fashion sense is as comfortable as mine,
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Nunya,
SHOOOEEESSSS!!! I just LOVE shoes. Do you mind if I start chewing right away? Can I hump your leg at the same time?
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Yogi has been busy lately killing birds weakened by the recent cold weather and eating his own vomit off the compost heap. So he hasn’t been online. I have to point out that that last comment was made by an impostor. It lacked his trademark bad language and signature (Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog).
That said, he would probably agree with the sentiments expressed in the comment.
Rory
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Dear Rowdy Dog,
Although it may seem like your chewing on them might actually enhance the look of these particular shoes, unless you want to become my next pair of Birkenstocks you may not chew on them. They are very expensive to buy and breaking them in is a real bear. Besides, they may be the same color as a frog, I’m not sure they are any more digestible than than what you’ve been eating lately,
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Hey Nunya, nice feet, real nice shoooooooss….
I gotta question for Mr. Urban Underclass…I just read the next chapter in the Iris Norther ireland sex scandal…it seems that the was not only fucking the 19 year old kid, but his father too.
This from a professed religious “family values” anti homosexual protestant..she got the son, then the father, when are we gonna find the holy ghost in the clioset? -
microdot,
I hadn’t heard that about the father, think it’s just a rumor. If there was a ghost, it would have to be the Dr Rev Ian Paisley, founder of the Free Presbyterian Church and the Democratic Unionist Party, now that would be something.
Nunya,
Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog is too enraged at being impersonated to go online, I think he’d rather hump someone’s shoe and chew their leg at the moment.
Rory
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Rory,
“Yogi A.K.A Rowdy_Dog is too enraged at being impersonated to go online, I think he’d rather hump someone’s shoe and chew their leg at the moment.”
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, Mr Politeness, please, we need a photoshop of this!
Nunya,
“Hi Valerie, Hi Stiletto, how are my favorite overseas ladies?”
It is so lovely to have you again. Your shoes look very comfortable. Just be careful that Rowdy dog and T-Rex don’t steal them from you! I hope it is warmer in San Diego than in Paris. Your garden looks wonderful. There is no gardens like this in Paris, except the public gardens and maybe some very rich people.
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Urban Underclass, I have read a number of references to Iris Robinsons earlier affair with the father of the 19 year old. He died of cancer in 2008.
It is even referred to in the Wikipedia article on her:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iris_Robinson
The father was truly replaced by the son.
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Hi Valérie,
I laughed when I read your comment. This is an apartment complex and the wall that you see in the picture holds up an earthen berm to dull the noise of 14 lanes of freeway. It doesn’t really help much, the freeway is really noisy. Since the complex was built over 40 years ago the landscaping is heavenly compared to most affordable apartment complexes, and the fact that there are only 10 units per building and only one floor per building makes the ability to keep the buildings free of pests (rats, roaches, mice, etc.) relatively easy. I don’t know how affordable the complex will be for many of the residents who do not qualify for gov subsidies and lose their jobs next summer. The full-time, take home wages of someone here at minimum wage would be the equivalent of 725 EUR, and rent would be about 696 EUR a month. Transportation costs would be around 52 EUR unless you walk to work and I can tell you that anything close to here is not employing anyone full-time because the health insurance companies charge so much to employers that none of the employers in the immediate area hire anyone full-time.
Sadly, there are many elderly and disabled people who live here who may get the section 8 voucher (rent subsidy), but are forced to pay more and more of their health care costs. Since they do not get more money from the government they will go without needed health care and medications. Although the elderly and disabled do qualify for subsidies in electricity/gas, telephone and transportation costs, no subsidies exist for food for them, which is also high here. No state subsidized water for farmers during the lengthy drought means that very little food is grown here
It’s hard to watch my neighbors suffer while arrogant banksters who are contemptuous of the people who make them rich insist on disgustingly high bonuses.
Wall Street Gravy Train: Obama To Tax ‘Obscene’ Compensation
We shall see if Obama gets anywhere with this idea, eh?
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Nunya,
In reply to your comment # 394:
Goodness. Shit-a-brick/fuck-a-duck, as we so elegantly say in Oz speak. This sounds worse than when I was in Florida.
Actually, no, it isn’t when I think about it. Dianne and I were incessantly “propped up” by money sent by my family.
On the other hand of course I robbed a few banks here and there to help things along. AmSouth was my favorite - they have a cute branch in Clearwater (Florida). But the best one was in Largo (Florida also): they had a drive-in thingie, just like a MacDonald. You point your gun and bingo… wads of money pour out directly into the trunk of your car.
Ahhh… the good old times… I still wonder why I was deported.
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WhyNot,
” Ahhh… the good old times… I still wonder why I was deported. “
:lol: -
WhyNot,
“they had a drive-in thingie, just like a MacDonald. You point your gun and bingo… wads of money pour out directly into the trunk of your car”
LOLLLLL, did you have to press buttons to say how much you wanted?
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Valérie,
“LOLLLLL, did you have to press buttons to say how much you wanted?”
Well, I never looked closely at the panel thingie, but there was a big button in my gun that said “gimme the whole fucking lot!”
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Maybe it was this big red button:
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Did anyone press THE BIG RED BUTTON YET?
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Microdot,
“Did anyone press THE BIG RED BUTTON YET?”
Hang on, still looking for it… wait, I just pulled my undies down and I think I found the BIG RED BUTTON… lemme press on it…
